71 Comments
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Latverian Diplomat's avatar

Ordinarily, I'd say $15k probably buys you a judge in Kansas, but there's a nail sticking out that must be hammered down in this case, so no deal.

Kansans call that "ethics".

sillyclucker's avatar

The best part of waking up is cupcakes made with crack! (Sung to the Folgers song tune)

Villago Delenda Est  🇺🇦's avatar

That's pretty much always the case.

When one of Reinhard Heydrich's subordinates questioned what he was proposing, as to it's legality, Heydrich told him "We're the police. Who's going to investigate us?"

Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

I knew it was one or the other

Jenny, a lowly Piñata Farmer🪅's avatar

Ha oh yeah they did. so you "know" what the bad drugs are of course. Then you can call the police and say Billy has pcp in his coat jacket today! GET HIM!

Jenny, a lowly Piñata Farmer🪅's avatar

The oil is enough to maybe fill a shotglass (1.5 oz) . An ounce of weed makes about 3 ml of oil. which is 10% of an ounce. So it probably looks like a lot just dry, laying about on a table, but not when it comes to making oil.

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🇺🇦 🇺🇦's avatar

Not yet, but the Kansas church ladies are knitting up a large number of "Dear Leader Brownback" quilts.

RevZafod's avatar

Well, fuck it, kids.

FYI, the name of the Kansas Gov is not Brownback; it's Brownshirt.

Next, I'm gonna start a GoFundMe for me to run for ANY OFFICE in Texas as a Republican, and I guarantee a win within my lifetime or triple your money back, personally from me [not my estate].

1] You fund me.2] I run for an office of the funders' choice.3] I change my name to George Prescott Herbert Walker Davy Crockett Sam Houston Bush.4] I run for any office and win, and consider my constituents to be Wonketeers.

How can you lose?

And Praise "Bob"!

stevola's avatar

So those are the cakes we like!

HogeyeGrex🌻's avatar

Imagine? Why do you think I Do Not Buy Cupcakes.

lovelydestruction's avatar

Oh honey, that's by the DARE playbook

amindofitsown's avatar

"Of course, said Kansas thugs have a different version of the story, claiming that “the boy told school officials that his mother and other adults in his home were avid drug users and that there was a lot of drug use occurring at the home.”

What the boy probably said: "You're full of shit! The benefits of medical marijuana have been well-documented, your Reagan-era patronizing propaganda won't work with me! My mom uses medical marijuana and it's been quite helpful with her ailments!"

What the teachers thought: "Drugs, drugs, drugs are bad, Obama coming for my guns, drugs drugs drugs..."

emw12's avatar

There's only one good thing about Kansas, and that's the BBQ.

kindness's avatar

California....so long as you don't really want any water.