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FeloniousMonk's avatar

That confused me too. I eventually figured out that his excuse was was that he meant to say something fitting the template "If you're bashful, then <something improbable>". Me, I'd probably fill in the blank with "I'm a monkey's uncle" or "I'm the king of Siam". To him, apparently, the obvious thing is "I've got a big dick", but he toned it down to something about snakes. Trying to explain himself, he comes up with something that only makes sense when you realize that an acre of land in the Everglades is hard to find. This is a natural idiom to people in Connecticut. Screw him. To put together the best suggestions so far, horsewhip him, tar and feather him, and ride him out of town on a rail.

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FeloniousMonk's avatar

Won't you view my collection of stamps? All unperforated.

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FeloniousMonk's avatar

They are better viewed in the kind candlelight. Now, have some Madeira, m'dear.

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

Mellowed...or maybe gained some wisdom. However, "it's amazing how much mature wisdom resembles being too tired". ~ Robert Heinlein

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

I'm betting Lorena Bobbitt was first in line...

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SullivanSt's avatar

Aside from the fundamental ignorance of biology and simple falsehood of this statement, I still really can't help but wonder: what point are they even trying to make with this nonsense?

I mean, if pregnancy from rape really was rare, then surely it would not be a big deal to allow an exception that would only cover a small number of cases, right?

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

Now see, I'm not a violent man, but in my world this fool would be immediately taken outside and tarred/feather. Then maybe horsewhipped.

Ok, maybe I am kinda violent, but in my world we'd find a new way forward is all I'm sayin'.

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

Not for at least 40 years, but yeah.

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WA Bishop's avatar

Please tell us more about this scandal.

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malsperanza's avatar

Be of good cheer. Iowa, as much as every other state, elects a few dingbats to its state legislature, but it has a damn fine record nationally. Since his mouth is apparently always full of Stupid, he seems to be an ideal GOP candidate for Senate ... if the aim is for the Dems to hold the majority: <a href="http:\/\/www.electoral-vote.com\/evp2013\/Pres\/Maps\/Mar01.html#item-1" target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://www.electoral-vote.com/evp2013/Pres/Maps/M...">http://www.electoral-vote.c...

What fascinates me is how common it is for conservative male public officials to be skeptical about the seriousness of rape. What constituency do they think they're speaking for? People who sympathize with rapists? People who think most women are liars and paranoids?

And if they are (as it seems) speaking purely on personal grounds, rather than as representatives of the voters, then ... just, yeeeeech.

ETA: not only the male Republicans. Silly me, I left out Celeste Greig, president of the California Republican Assembly, and Mary Sue McClurkin of the Alabama state legislature.

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

at least it wasn't one of those dreaded Harlem Snakes

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

I'm just glad your link isn't to a My Little Pony with its trouser snake out, not sure I could deal with that one. Though I imagine it's probably hung like a...

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

Hey kid, nice asp...

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Comrade Wingtardd's avatar

"Oh shit, no, by damp and dark swampland, I meant take her out to the hunting property and show her my gun ... "

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Comrade Wingtardd's avatar

For some reason I'd wager this guy watches a lot of Seth McFarlane and South Park type crap.

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malsperanza's avatar

Also, Rep. Steve King of Iowa is the likely next GOP candidate for the Senate, thereby helping the Dems to retain the majority there: <a href="http://2012.talkingpointsme..." target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://2012.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/08/steve-k...">http://2012.talkingpointsme...

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