538 Comments
User's avatar
Runfastandwin's avatar

The Beaver uses

his teeth and tail

to build a dam

that will not fail

weejee's avatar

Eeeegrrrr beavers.

tehbaddr's avatar

Babby Paddle Tailed Water Rats!

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

Happy babies!

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Momma Beaver was wise to get them babies out of that reflecting pool.

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Beavers are like British Bulldogs; you can’t believe there are actually baby ones.

Monsieur Grumpe's avatar

Beaver milk? Has RFK heard about this?

Thomas Molano's avatar

He’s more interested in beaver talleywhackers.

satch's avatar

Goes great with wood chips.

The Wanderer's avatar

Venezuelan Beaver Cheese!

Craig Nixon's avatar

My imagination is running rampant.

The Wanderer's avatar

Look up the "Monty Python Cheese Shop" sketch. It's amazing.

And beavers aren't native to that region. Capybaras are, and I imagine you can milk them to make cheese, but why?

Craig Nixon's avatar

I was just speaking of the Dirty Vicar Sketch yesterday.

Sarah Ennals's avatar

My favourite part of that sketch is the two or three young men in the background whose sole job is to come in, notice the vicar, and dash back out before anyone sees them.

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

You told us why - because beavers are not readily available.

Menotsure's avatar

Til old enough to chew on wood

The little baby beavers

Find their mother's milk so good

They never want to leave her

But when those beaver teeth come in

Mama says she's through

To suckle is a good thing

But no mom likes a chew.

Linda1961 is proudly woke's avatar

I've been trying in vain to come up with a "Leave it to Beaver" joke.

PrimerGray's avatar

Don't bang your head against the Wally trying to think of one. It will become Lumpy and it's not worth the Haskell.

Stuart's avatar

It's really kind of amazing. June Cleaver is often held up as the most wholesome mother in American history -- and she called her own son "Beaver Cleaver." Really?

Sarah Ennals's avatar

And she can translate Jive!

marydn's avatar
11hEdited

Theodore was Beaver's real name. June had an uncle named Theodore. Wally is the one who first called him Beaver because he couldn't pronounce Theodore. And now everyone knows I have watched too much Leave it to Beaver.

CambridgeKnitter's avatar

As the daughter, sister and aunt of Theodores (and the niece of an aunt whose middle name was Theodora), I glommed right onto that Theodore stuff in Leave It to Beaver.

The Wanderer's avatar

So damned cute.

The Wanderer's avatar

(bows)

Kay Ducky's avatar

Aw, dam.

Monsieur Grumpe's avatar

Or as tRump now spells it

Aw damb.

Well Dressed & Incredibly Jen's avatar

Sorta related: the other night I let youngest DJ in the car and Primus came on, Winonna's Big Brown Beaver. Hubby's car does the tell you what is playing thing, and hubby near had a heart attack guffawing at the name of the song. Then asked me why I said they sucked, cause he thought it was pretty good, musically.

Old man out of touch!

Craig Nixon's avatar

Not Primus related, but how was supper-in-the-middle-of-the-day yesterday?

Well Dressed & Incredibly Jen's avatar

In the middle of the day XD I was quite peckish come 9, but I went to bed instead lol

Also, very tasty

Martini Glambassador's avatar

Aw, I like Primus!

Martini Glambassador's avatar

LOL, clearly I am also an out-of-touch old man!

Well Dressed & Incredibly Jen's avatar

I have no idea why Les started saying that back in the day but he went through a phase where he didn't like it anymore, but then he leaned back into it. He is a weird dude ^.^

Martini Glambassador's avatar

He is, although that's why they are so quirky and wonderful.

Al Bellenchia's avatar

Eager beavers…

GrannysKnitting's avatar

seriously, the leader of your country is a fucking moron 'ooh lets own the libs and chance ice to nice' what a tit

3FingerPete's avatar

The proper reply to Ambassador Bill White's request for personal information should be a referral to the reply given in the case of Arkell v. Pressdram.

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

It'll have to be Dumocrat no matter what MAGA wants.

A Dumbocrat is a small, floppy-eared pachyderm who works for the Deep State.

3FingerPete's avatar

Has Peter Doocy's voice always been that flouncy?

Nemo's avatar

We need to take Trump up to Maine, plop his flabby ass on his gold "throne" at low tide and get him to command the sea to stay ebbed. Take a picnic box full of Big Macs and Diet Coke and let him text. It will only take a few hours.

TalentNotAutotune's avatar

Trump Media Group's stock is at (or very near) an all-time low. $8.24/share. I think it's the worst-performing stock of the last 12 months - something like that. And by "worst-performing" I mean the worst-performing of ALL stocks from ANY market.

It's down 40% this calendar year which is better that what it's done over the last 12 months - down 53% since June 2025. It's down 91% from its all-time high of $97.54, set back in March 2022.

No one has ever seen anything like it! Except Enron shareholders, they have.

Let's all hope those clowns borrowed against their DJT stock.

Hank Napkin's avatar

The so-called problem with the Reflecting Pool is not a problem with the Reflecting Pool. The problem is with the Washington Monument.

TalentNotAutotune's avatar

Soon to be known as the Trump/Washington Monument!

Hollysdower's avatar

I read the article about Bill White, ambassador to Belgium, threatening a US citizen for emailing Zac Brown not to play at Trump's birthday cage fight. What it doesn't say is how on earth Bill White saw this email. It was from an American in Belgium, but...is the US embassy in Belgium monitoring all outgoing email? Did Zac Brown report this guy? How does something like this happen?

Karen Scofield's avatar

Gotta have my Tab's and Coffee ☕ 💯👍

Pere Ubu's avatar

Well, if el Caudillo decides to get all UNPREDICTABLE!!! by renaming the Gestapo to "NICE", what we need to do is then use the pronunciation of the French city, so we can all "hate those NICEs to pieces"! Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

My god! It’s full of grifts!

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/jun/22/barron-kai-trump-yerba-mate-energy-drink-review

One thing you can always be guaranteed with a Trump product: failure. And a focus on low quality. Okay, that’s two things. Also, a premium price for a substandard offering.

Stranger Than Friction's avatar

200mg of caffeine in every Blue Raz Slush Accelerator drink, with a label warning "not for children under 18," created by Kai Trump (who turned 19 in May). What could go wrong?

Why didn't she just name it "True Grift"? The name says it all and implies a ripping off of "True Grit," while boosting the scent of "bootstraps," yet providing a soupcon of "robbing the rubes." SO Trumpy.

pskbh's avatar

Curious why she's Kai Trump not Kai Kushner 🤔?

AppleScruff's avatar

Isn't she Don or Eric's kid? I don't think she belongs to Ivanka.

🕊️ ꕷꖹꕷꗍ ♌'s avatar

Fun article! The drinks sound destined for failure, as usual for this loser family.

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

While the blue Kai drink sounds awful and chemically, Barton’s taste of Florida makes me think of whatever a used crack pipe dipped in Coppertone might taste like.

Stranger Than Friction's avatar

With a hint of urine soaked bedding?

David N. Brown's avatar

Undoubtedly late to this, when ICE/ NICE first came up, I immediately referenced CS Lewis' That Hideous Strength and saw others doing the same. And the book said a whole lot more about masculinity that completely applies to MAGA.

Sister Artemis's avatar

Can't believe we didn't get a wonk-poll out of this

Cincinnatus's avatar

"Ride the D!"

Los Angeles’ public transit agency, Metro, sold out of its supply of new t‑shirts and crop tops promoting the agency’s upcoming subway extension thanks to a viral, and risqué, marketing push.

The shirts read, “Ride the D,” referring to the D Line extension running beneath Wilshire Boulevard through the Mid‑Wilshire corridor. The long-awaited stretch, with new stations at La Brea, Fairfax and La Cienega, opens May 8.

“Traveling through Mid‑Wilshire to experience the culture, cuisine and commerce across diverse neighborhoods will be easier, faster and more accessible,” Metro said in a news release Thursday, the same day it began selling “Ride the D” shirts for $21. “Give the gift of the D before opening day 5.8.2026!,” the agency posted on social media alongside a photo of a male model wearing a unisex shirt.

About 24 hours later, the shirts were gone; Metro’s online store temporarily had an error message: “Oops! The page you are looking for is not here.” Fans jumped onto social media to demand a restock, and to weigh in on the clearly intentional innuendo. Without addressing the wink behind the campaign, Metro reassured fans that more “Ride the D” gear was on the way. And in a statement to KTLA on Friday, the transit agency still wouldn’t admit the innuendo was deliberate.

https://ktla.com/news/local-news/metro-ride-the-d-shirts/

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Stiff Records and Tapes, an indie label from the 80's, had t-shirts that read: If It Stiff, It Ain't Worth A Fuck.

Nemo's avatar

Reminds me of the sweat shirts for Seattle's South Lake Union Transit; S.L.U.T

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

“What’s that patch for, soldier?”

“Reflecting pool paint patrol.”

Pope Buck I's avatar

"My grandpa who marched behind Patton would be so proud!"