14 Comments

Whenever you go out You can hear the people shout, "Look at that stupid ass dog's cunt!"

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It's all about the Core.

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Working on a pun for liposuction.

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No, see -- they want to hold high school graduation in the church, so that EVERYBODY has to go there. And if anyone objects, they're just a demon-possessed atheist.

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Piyush Jindal, where are you?!?!

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Dear Klingenschmitt-voters: Fuck you. Morans.

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He thinks that he's exorcising his first amendment rights.

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It's just that demon life has got me in its sway

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I thought that was just the reaction to Canadian Whiskey.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has many ideas, but none worth mentioning.

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O Lord, do we have the strength to carry off this mighty task in one night? Or are we just jerking off? **courtesy of Reverend Johnson, "Blazing Saddles"

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In our no-religion high school here in rural Ontario, we often end up with some Christianist doing the invocation, during which he expresses the sincere desire that all the graduates embrace Jay-sus as their personal saviour. And after the commencement is over I head straight for the principal to bitch about it. Last year I cut it off at the pass by volunteering to do it myself, and was brief, non-denominational, and at the same time sufficiently spiritual to keep the crowd happy. Alas, this coming year the local fundy preacher, whose daughter is graduating, has asked to do the invocation. And he is one of the WORST.

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Yes, and you can track their progress on your <i>demonicfitbit</i>™

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His daughter is actually one of my special pets- a very sweet, shy girl. Now, her eldest brother- he's an asshole. Oh, and now a teacher as well, thankfully far, far away.

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