Happy Solstice, you ugly vile little snark mob! Welcome to yet another Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we steam-clean our browser tabs, clearing out a bunch of stories that weren't worth a full post on their own, but too stoopid to ignore altogether. Then we serve up the resulting sludge up for you to choke down as best you can (Protip: Add liquor).
<i>&quot;Also, there are &ldquo;legions of lawyers lined up to bludgeon wealthy Americans and corporations&rdquo; for a &ldquo;piece of the action.&rdquo;</i>
The legions of Wall Street brokers, advisors, fund managers, and &quot;investment gurus&quot; like this twatwaffle represent, at a rough guess, about one million times the parasitic load of lawyers. What does Schiff&#039;s &quot;piece of the action&quot; come to, for doing nothing remotely productive?
Bristol&#039;s got the grift nailed: she&#039;s making a fine living doing absolutely nothing, withi nothing to contribute but imitations of her mommy, and without the distinction of having once been a governor and VP candidate for a minute. I&#039;d say she&#039;s doing it right.
That&#039;s one helluva long name, GW. I&#039;d love to be present in that kid&#039;s homeroom when the teacher takes attendance on the first day of school...
&quot;...Nelson, Monica (&#039;Here!&#039;), Norris, Eugene (&#039;Present!&#039;), O&#039;Neill, Patrick (&#039;Yo!&#039;), O&#039;Reilly, Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue...(no answer). Repeating: O&#039;Reilly, Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue... are you here? (No answer.) Anyone? Does anyone know if Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue O&#039;Reilly is in school today? Anyone? (Faint cry from the back of the room: &#039;Here!&#039;)&quot;
As I was reading about Ms Sacco&#039;s tweet, I got a delicious foreshadowing . . . Could it be, I thought to myself, that by the time her plane touches down she will need either police protection or a new job? I guess it truly is a season of miracles! Go enjoy unemployment, Sacked-o. Nobody deserves it more (today, anyway).
Read some of the her other tweets from the same flight:
&quot;Been downing #WhiteRussians all flight in support of #Sochi2014! Seat 5A sent me a Johnnie Walker Black, but I sent it back!&quot;
&quot;ugh now White Chicks is playing on the in-flight don&rsquo;t understand why it&rsquo;s okay when THEY do it #confused&quot;
&quot;I think the lady across the aisle is clicking at me. I&rsquo;m sorry ... I don&rsquo;t speak Kwanzaa LOL #whitesanta&quot;
And some older tweets that the good people of Twitter and Gawker dug up:
&ldquo;I had a sex dream about an autistic kid last night.&rdquo;
&quot;Someone get the rape kit ready for Tom Brady. Go Giants! #SuperBowl&quot;
&quot;As I sit and eat a bagel with lox, i would like to send love to my jews who are all starving themselves right now. #hungryhungryhebrews&quot;
&quot;Just thanked Gov Cuomo for supporting #womensrights. Need to stop geeking out over politicians that love abortions.&quot;
It bothers me more than a bit that every not-so-affluent person is in a lot more danger, and the affluent started it.
<i>&quot;Also, there are &ldquo;legions of lawyers lined up to bludgeon wealthy Americans and corporations&rdquo; for a &ldquo;piece of the action.&rdquo;</i>
The legions of Wall Street brokers, advisors, fund managers, and &quot;investment gurus&quot; like this twatwaffle represent, at a rough guess, about one million times the parasitic load of lawyers. What does Schiff&#039;s &quot;piece of the action&quot; come to, for doing nothing remotely productive?
Bristol&#039;s got the grift nailed: she&#039;s making a fine living doing absolutely nothing, withi nothing to contribute but imitations of her mommy, and without the distinction of having once been a governor and VP candidate for a minute. I&#039;d say she&#039;s doing it right.
Slumming is flying on a commercial airline.
Today&#039;s guillotines are mounted on drones.
Plumber, electrician, air conditioning technician, etc, work too.
Thanks for the tip, Billo. I&#039;m not affluent, so I guess I don&#039;t have anything to worry about.
&ldquo;Every affluent person in America is in danger. Every one.&rdquo;
If by &quot;affluent&quot; you mean &quot;stinking rich&quot; then not quite yet, Billo. But soon...
That&#039;s one helluva long name, GW. I&#039;d love to be present in that kid&#039;s homeroom when the teacher takes attendance on the first day of school...
&quot;...Nelson, Monica (&#039;Here!&#039;), Norris, Eugene (&#039;Present!&#039;), O&#039;Neill, Patrick (&#039;Yo!&#039;), O&#039;Reilly, Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue...(no answer). Repeating: O&#039;Reilly, Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue... are you here? (No answer.) Anyone? Does anyone know if Fuck Justine Gay Marry Obama Kill Schiff Sue O&#039;Reilly is in school today? Anyone? (Faint cry from the back of the room: &#039;Here!&#039;)&quot;
I learn so much at Wonkette. Thanks Dok for a new internet favorite in my house: assholeoftheday.us
As I was reading about Ms Sacco&#039;s tweet, I got a delicious foreshadowing . . . Could it be, I thought to myself, that by the time her plane touches down she will need either police protection or a new job? I guess it truly is a season of miracles! Go enjoy unemployment, Sacked-o. Nobody deserves it more (today, anyway).
I always pray for the rich; I pray many of them fry in Hell.
Yes...I will. In fact, I&#039;m thinking about torches, pitchforks, and guillotines .
Read some of the her other tweets from the same flight:
&quot;Been downing #WhiteRussians all flight in support of #Sochi2014! Seat 5A sent me a Johnnie Walker Black, but I sent it back!&quot;
&quot;ugh now White Chicks is playing on the in-flight don&rsquo;t understand why it&rsquo;s okay when THEY do it #confused&quot;
&quot;I think the lady across the aisle is clicking at me. I&rsquo;m sorry ... I don&rsquo;t speak Kwanzaa LOL #whitesanta&quot;
And some older tweets that the good people of Twitter and Gawker dug up:
&ldquo;I had a sex dream about an autistic kid last night.&rdquo;
&quot;Someone get the rape kit ready for Tom Brady. Go Giants! #SuperBowl&quot;
&quot;As I sit and eat a bagel with lox, i would like to send love to my jews who are all starving themselves right now. #hungryhungryhebrews&quot;
&quot;Just thanked Gov Cuomo for supporting #womensrights. Need to stop geeking out over politicians that love abortions.&quot;
Yeah, she&#039;s a peach. <a href="http://gawker.com/are-we-su..." target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://gawker.com/are-we-sure-this-was-not-meant-...">http://gawker.com/are-we-su...
&quot;you ugly vile little snark mob!&quot; *joy*
Yeah, so did I, but I&#039;m allowed to because I am one. #confused