2268 Comments
User's avatar
Pisto75666-Radical Left Scum's avatar

A MAGA...sexting someone other than their spouse?

Gasp...pretends to be shocked.gif.

Speaking of witches I'm finally listening to Florence & The Machine's "Everybody Scream" album. It's SO so good.

forestvillain's avatar

I thought everyone knew that the only way to save a fallen woman is through her vagina. /s (for the snark challenged)

Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

The “family values” crowd never seems to run out of pastors warning America about witches, lesbians, and moral collapse while allegedly texting beauty queens from Mar-a-Lago like a youth pastor who found the emoji keyboard after midnight. The hypocrisy is the whole brand now: scream about sexual sin, blame women, call everyone else demonic, then announce God has forgiven you right before the next fundraising email goes out.

larry gassan's avatar

Fundies would collapse without Satan, and his Scissor Sisters help-meats. Meets. WTF ever.

Snarkasaurus Rex's avatar

Damien Helpmeats is definitely going to be my Satanic pr0n name.

larry gassan's avatar

Or your indie band name at the next JesusPalooza

marydn's avatar

I know I have been using computers since the late 1980's but that does not mean I understand them. So I couldn't sleep and pulled out my tablet to start the doom scroll. There was an "article" about a Taco Bell in Missouri. Just a reminder I am in AZ and my tablet knows that. So, of course it wasn't an article but an ad to order food from Taco Bell in Missouri. Why?!? I live less than two miles from a Taco Bell so why would I want to order from one in Missouri? I tried to change the address and got it to agree that I am in AZ but it would not bring up my Taco Bell. I know, white people (who aren't eating proper Mexican food) problems but somebody make it make sense.

JCfromNC's avatar

I still have Swarm on my phone from when I played Pokemon, and I still check in to places for shits & giggles. Anyway, every now and then, I'll open up Swarm and it'll be convinced that I'm in Ecuador. I have no idea why it does this, but it does.

Schmannity's avatar

"Retired General Shreds Trump’s Iran Concessions on Fox News: ‘They Shouldn’t Get Any of It’"

"There’s $300 billion investment fund. Who cares where the money comes from? If it doesn’t come from the United States, I get that. Of course it shouldn’t. But it shouldn’t come from anybody. I mean, when we recovered Germany and Japan, the Nazis weren’t in charge, the Japanese imperialists weren’t in charge. Here, the Iranians are in charge. The killers and thugs are still in charge. We don’t give them that money because what are they going to do with it? They’re going to recover everything we have taken away from them. Who cares whether it’s coming from the Arabs or Qataris or whatever. They don’t get it. They shouldn’t get any of it. That’s just the reality of it. They’re going to take that money and recover everything. And you know that, Sean. You know that you can’t trust these people."

Jen Is Not It's avatar

Where does dude think the 300 billion "investment fund" is going to come from?

Tammy Scumbag's avatar

So Iran is going to take the money and...rebuild everything the U.S. destroyed for no reason in Trump's pointless, idiotic war? This is his beef? Am I reading this correctly?

Jen Is Not It's avatar

Quite. Part of the concept of a deal is that we fund their rebuilding.

Dude is pissed about that.

Tammy Scumbag's avatar

Too bad it won't bring back the children the Trump regime murdered.

Raccoon of Vengeance's avatar

No. We lost this war. The money comes from us.

Shocktreatment's avatar

Oh shite! The gardener next door has put down blood meal, to deter rabbits from the veggies...

There's an owl in the alley that has rabbit duty, he's effective and enthusiastic. Nobody on the block has rabbit or squirrel problems. What we have now are meat flies and stinging flies...

Jen Is Not It's avatar

It's gonna be 81 freedom degrees today. It's gonna be 95 on Thursday, which is just two days from now. I should like el nino to get the fuck off my seesaw now, thanks.

Jen Is Not It's avatar

Thursday night into friday it looks like. We need the rain so I will take it, but I would not be me without wishing the rain would hit about 11 am so I could quit the field on Hotday

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

Working the local elections today. Primaries for dem and MAGA GQP pieces of shit primaries and a state question to raise minimum wage (vote yes). Despite having a dearth of sleep Monday, I still didn't sleep well last night due to anticipation about over sleeping. Election days are LONG.

JCfromNC's avatar

I feel your pain, or at least I used to. Back when I was in the Reserve, we would occasionally travel to Camp Lejeune for our weekend training. Since they didn't want to pay us for an extra half-day, instead of having us bussed down at night, we'd have to show up at 4am at the Reserve center to get on the bus to head to Jacksonville. Most of the times we had to do that, I'd wake up at least 3 times during the night, in a panic that I'd overslept.

Hirightnow's avatar

Sweety is the same way: "I can't go to sleep! I won't wake up in time!"

(next day)

"How was work?"

"huzlaamaakurflim"

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

I just wake up in a panic every 45 minutes. -_-

Schmannity's avatar

Fox’s Greg Gutfeld Defends UFC Fighter Who Called Michelle Obama a Man: ‘We Enjoy It When You’re Upset’

https://www.mediaite.com/media/tv/foxs-greg-gutfeld-defends-ufc-fighter-who-called-michelle-obama-a-man-we-enjoy-it-when-youre-upset/

noname's avatar

Does anyone anywhere care what he thinks or says?

noname's avatar

Even the idiot showrunner of that shit (Dana White?) has criticized that asshole fighter. "Condmemned" is the word I'm seeing, don't know more than that.

Raccoon of Vengeance's avatar

No you just want picks of her vagina.

Linda1961 aka Pollyanna's avatar

At this point, it doesn't upset me. This 5 year old mentality (as Carstonio put it) is what I expect from these morons. Most 5 year olds mature, but these people are hopeless.

Hops: grrr mad's avatar

I'll enjoy it when he's (redacted).

Carstonio's avatar

He’s basically admitting that they have the mentality of spoiled 5-year-olds. Despite Michelle Obama’s talk about going high, it seems unreasonable to suggest she doesn’t imagine breaking the UFC fighter’s jaw.

Shocktreatment's avatar

The risible twerp believes that an appalling imbecile in the brain damage business has the ability to "upset" us?

A fellow gets handed a microphone to address more people than he'll ever have the chance to speak to again, ever...

He takes this rare, precious opportunity and makes sure that the world knows he's an unemployable dumbass...

Who would ask that asshole anything about anything?

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

The "own the libs" battle cry. What a completely ignorant fucknozzle he is. Juvenile, playground taunts of bully.

Tia Loca's avatar

Yes, we know that you’re proud to be bullies, wife beaters, child abusers and psychopaths.

And you get your jollies off being able to get away with no consequences because it has been normalized by people like you.

Tia Loca's avatar

And that orange abomination that you worship will just pardon you anyways.

Yeah, we know.

Jen Is Not It's avatar

Gee, tell us something we don't know.

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

Even an ant couldn't swim in their shallowness.

Randy Bender's avatar

Republinazis parading their transgressive personality disorders again. OH NOE I said a forbidden word--THOUGHT CRIMES!

I'd better hop in my TransAm and getaway--OH SHIT I DIDIT AGAIN!

I'm gonna book a ticket on TransWorld Airlines and get the hell outta here!!1!!

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

We were embarrassed for you, not with you.

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

Got an email from an author yesterday saying that using the (scant) information I gave him, he used GeminiAI to run the analysis of his test and could I or my boss (who is a big proponent of AI) could help him write the next prompt. I wrote back to him and said, "I'm going to kick this over to Boss as I don't really use AI." I'll be curious to see what she says. Our manuals say we use a specific process for analyses, and since we don't know the process AI uses, I'm not sure how we write the methodology. Writing "we used AI to X, Y, and Z," isn't sound science one bit.

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

A letter from a Maine citizen, presented without comment.

𝗔𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗙𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗠𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗲

https://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/another-perspective-from-maine

Jen Is Not It's avatar

I think Mainers are hungry for public servants who are not obviously and shamelessly full of shit.

*rubs eyes*

So...we swallowed the entire I was just an innocent marine and had no idea what it meant line?

Randy Bender's avatar

Whatever we personally may think about Platner, at the end of the day it's a numbers game, and our people's survival depends on the Demonrats controlling the Senate & the House.

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

London dogs are bright, but they're also disobedient.

They can read the sign, but choose to ignore it.

https://bsky.app/profile/nocontextbritss.bsky.social/post/3mofg2wb3he2h

Shocktreatment's avatar

I tried a 𝗜𝗳 𝗬𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗟𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗧𝗼 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝗼𝗺, 𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗟𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗢𝗳𝗳 sign, but the cats ignored it like it wasn't even there!

aktlib101's avatar

Tom Dans (who?) must be a genius. See, we need Greenland because who wouldn't want to save Red Lobster?

https://www.rawstory.com/greenland-red-lobster/

"One of the Trump administration officials who went all-in on President Donald Trump's far-fetched scheme of taking over Greenland pitched it as a bizarre way to rescue the Red Lobster restaurants, the New Yorker reported on Monday."

"Tom Dans, the Trump-appointed director of the United States Arctic Research Commission, has a much stranger pitch for why the U.S. needs control of Greenland.

"When I met him for lunch in Washington, earlier this year, he declined to speak further on the record, except to articulate a narrow, symbiotic vision for the future," reported Ben Taub. Specifically, Dans suggested, “My view is that the United States could take all the seafood Greenland could produce, and cut out the middleman, and keep it from China, and you could bring back all-you-can-eat shrimp at Red Lobster.”

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

1. Take Greenland.

2. Bring back all you can eat shrimp.

3. ??

4. National security.

Shocktreatment's avatar

The Strategic Shrimp Cocktail Sauce Reservoir hasn't been used in awhile, we should check expiration dates...

Tia Loca's avatar

*Blinks*

*Blinks*

*Blinks*

……………

*Pulls blanket back over head*

Bobathonic's avatar

Maybe Dead Lobster deserves to fail, did you think of that?

Shocktreatment's avatar

I would really like to bring back 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 to government.

People miss it

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

JFC ... how many of these mediocre white men are running things now?

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

𝟲-𝗬𝗲𝗮𝗿-𝗼𝗹𝗱 𝗙𝗶𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗔𝗻𝗰𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗩𝗶𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗦𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗹 𝗙𝗶𝗲𝗹𝗱 𝗧𝗿𝗶𝗽, 𝗕𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟭,𝟯𝟬𝟬 𝗬𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀

https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/6-year-old-finds-ancient-viking-sword-on-school-field-trip-buried-for-1300-years/

Meccalopolis's avatar

Is that where I left it?

Shocktreatment's avatar

Always the last place you look...

vorpal 🇨🇦 Elbows Up! 🇨🇦's avatar

well, by ancient law the six year old is now the local king.

Opalescent Riddles's avatar

Listen. Strange children loitering in fields picking up rusty metal bits is no basis for a system of government.

Shocktreatment's avatar

"Oh, king, eh, very nice. An’ how’d you get that, eh? By exploitin’ the workers — by ‘angin’ on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic an’ social differences in our society! If there’s ever going to be any progress..."

Come and see the violence inherent in the system!

Jen Is Not It's avatar

Must be graded on a curve though. A full grown man has to pull it out of a stone, a six year old may pull it from the soil.

Jen Is Not It's avatar

you know, I have never found a sword. Part of a bayonet once, bits of kitchen knife here and there, but never a sword. Some people have all the luck.

eo's avatar

I unearthed an antique glass insulator in my front yard, and I became King of the Electrical Grid.

JCfromNC's avatar

IK,R? How cool would that be?

Jen Is Not It's avatar

SO VERY COOL.

But I do not think the vikings got this far south so probably never gonna happen XD

Someone found a CS Calvary saber or whatever it is actually called (I read something about the sword terminology being corrected from what is generally known by the public, but I do not remember all of it) at the work place years ago, before there was even an antiquities act, but it is certainly nothing I might find.