2067 Comments
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VasyaCognito's avatar

Winning!

‪Ambassador Ken Fairfax (ret)‬

‪@portlandken.bsky.social

Quintessential Trump:

In 2025, Trump axed the program to combat New World Screwworm, stating that they had "saved" $1.5 million a year.

In 2026, the Trump announces a $1 billion emergency program to combat the Screwworm outbreak.

$1 billion would have funded the old program for 667 years.

https://bsky.app/profile/portlandken.bsky.social/post/3moekjh5v522s

Jamoche's avatar

Evidence that plagiarism is as old as writing: some closing text (colophons) from literary cuneiform tablets:

Whoever trusts in you will not be shamed, o king of the gods, Ashur! Whoever takes (this tablet) away, or writes his own name instead of mine, may Ashur and Ninlil wildly and furiously reject him, and make his name and seed disappear from the land.

Whoever erases my name and writes his own, may Nabu, scribe of everything, erase his name!

Daniel's avatar

"Plagiarism" is, of course, named for Plagiarus, a mythological character who transformed into another person's poetry as famously recounted in Metamorphoses, the collection of myths by the famous Roman poet Dave.

JCfromNC's avatar

I watched this because Kaja Folgio (of "Girl Genius") spoke so highly of it.

Ronald Hutton gives a lecture on "Gods of Prehistoric Britain" for Gresham College's series of online lectures. It's very interesting, and as you might expect, spends a good deal of its time talking about Stonehenge. There's a short Q&A session at the end.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QjC0lGr4h04 (58:10)

easelox is on timeout's avatar

Speaking of AI taking over jobs:

I like to read auto enthusiast blogs about all kinds of car stuff. Sometimes though, they ask the dumbest questions and then answer them in obviously AI fluffed up slop.

So I spent 2 minutes prompting chat gpt to write a parody. I actually laughed out loud pretty hard, I guess because I don’t trust a damn thing online anymore, and this is just icing on the cake:

*Can You Really Convert a Gas Car to Diesel Fuel Just by Doing It Gradually?*

The Internet's Most Patient Engine Swap

Every few years, automotive enthusiasts discover a revolutionary new method for modifying their vehicles that completely bypasses decades of engineering knowledge. This year's breakthrough? Converting a gasoline-powered car to diesel simply by increasing the diesel content in the fuel tank by 5% per fill-up until the car eventually "learns" to run on diesel.

The answer, surprisingly, is yes.

According to several people who have posted confidently online, modern vehicles contain sophisticated computers capable of adapting to changing conditions. These computers routinely adjust fuel mixture, ignition timing, transmission behavior, seat positions, radio presets, and, in some cases, the driver's entire personality. It stands to reason that given enough time, they could gradually teach a spark-ignition gasoline engine the principles of compression ignition.

How the Process Works

The procedure is straightforward:

Tank 1: 95% gasoline, 5% diesel

Tank 2: 90% gasoline, 10% diesel

Tank 3: 85% gasoline, 15% diesel

Continue until the vehicle is running on 100% diesel

During this transition period, the engine control unit (ECU) carefully studies the diesel molecules as they pass through the fuel system. Much like learning a foreign language through immersion, the injectors slowly become familiar with diesel culture and customs.

By approximately 40% diesel concentration, the pistons typically begin speaking with a faint German accent.

The Science

Skeptics often point out that gasoline and diesel engines operate on fundamentally different combustion principles.

These people are technically correct, which is the least useful kind of correct.

What they fail to understand is that modern electronics are incredibly advanced. Your smartphone can recognize faces, translate languages, and recommend videos that somehow know exactly how much time you intended to waste today. Why couldn't a Honda Civic simply decide to become a diesel?

Researchers estimate that if enough diesel is added gradually, the engine's compression ratio will eventually realize it has been holding itself back all these years.

Warning Signs of Successful Conversion

As the transformation progresses, owners may notice:

Increased confidence during cold starts

A sudden desire to idle for long periods

The vehicle referring to fuel economy in a smug tone

The appearance of an invisible turbocharger

Growing interest in European station wagons

These are all normal signs that the vehicle is embracing its new identity.

What About the Transmission?

Some readers may wonder whether additional modifications are needed.

Fortunately, the transmission learns as well.

Much as some people mistakenly assume different transmission fluids are important for different transmission designs, the adaptive-learning approach allows mechanical components to discover their true purpose over time. A transmission exposed to enough diesel-fueled driving will naturally begin shifting with the gravitas expected of a compression-ignition vehicle.

Engineers call this "personal growth."

Expert Testimony

One enthusiast reported:

"After 17 tanks, my car was running terribly, producing smoke, and illuminating several warning lights. This proves the computer was actively rewriting its operating parameters."

Another noted:

"The dealership told me to stop immediately, which shows how disruptive this technology could be to the traditional automotive industry."

The Final Stage

At 100% diesel, the conversion is complete.

The engine may no longer start, run, or operate in any recognizable manner, but this should not be interpreted as failure. Instead, it indicates the vehicle has transcended gasoline-era assumptions and entered a period of deep mechanical reflection.

Some cars remain in this state permanently.

Conclusion

So can you really convert a gasoline car into a diesel-powered vehicle simply by gradually increasing the diesel content and allowing the onboard electronics to learn?

Absolutely.

Just as a goldfish can become a trout through exposure to increasingly cold water, and a microwave can become an air fryer if you believe in software updates strongly enough, a gasoline engine can become a diesel through patience, persistence, and a complete disregard for how engines work.

Results may vary slightly depending on the vehicle, the fuel, and the laws of thermodynamics.

Jens TINGLEFF's avatar

The A1 creating jobs! In auto repair…

JCfromNC's avatar

I thought maybe this was going to go in this direction somewhat:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uErKI0zWgjg

"One Piece at a Time", Johnny Cash

easelox is on timeout's avatar

Oh yeah, that song is buried in the foundations of my psyche, I first heard it in the 70’s on FM radio in the Santa Cruz mountains. KFAT RIP.

Nancy Naive's avatar

When I consider the technological miracle of the internet and the creation of AI, I am awestruck by the ability of the human intellect, and then dumbstruck when I read what we put on it.

PrimerGray's avatar

Like our pal belfryp said, the internet made smart people smarter and stupid people dangerous.

Daniel's avatar

https://bsky.app/profile/antifa-ultras.bsky.social/post/3moe7z6qys226

Far right chud goes to Manchester, tries to attack some kids, gets the shit kicked out of him in front of fucking Gregg's.

Daniel's avatar

It should also be noted that through the middle of the city centre in Manchester runs Moseley Street.

It is, in fact, named for the family of THAT Moseley, but one of his ancestors. It's just quite fitting.

InMyRoom's avatar

Racist ass gets his ass kicked.

Good.

Daniel's avatar

Some people moan the kids of today have no respect for tradition, but they clearly do. They're keeping the local rite of "kicking pallid fascists, especially when they're down" alive.

Aquaman, Real Estate Investor.'s avatar

I did enjoy people repeatedly kicking him in the arse.

That was quite amusing.

Daniel's avatar

The original video post doesn't say where it is, but as soon as I heard the "oh my fucking god!" I knew. That's home. That's us.

𝕺𝖓𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖔𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖍𝖆𝖓𝖉's avatar

So you know how you don’t even notice something until you notice it and then it’s there and it cannot be tolerated? The dust cover was sagging on the bottom of my sofa, which seems to come with the territory with cats, so I got some little upholstery tacks with which to fix it.

I flipped the couch up on its side, and discovered that the fabric was beyond salvage. So I removed it, but then I discovered that the lining was gapping down and I had to nail the cover back on the frame. I just finished, looked up, and realized I was under supervision.

https://substack.com/profile/1687878-1d57a1d5931d/note/c-277131809?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=106di

InMyRoom's avatar

They are making sure you do it right.

InMyRoom's avatar

The DACA renewals are being slow-walked. People are losing their jobs because, without the renewal, they have lost the right to work. And ICE is starting to pick them up for deportation.

Enter Ranting's avatar

Reducing the tax rolls wasn't part of the plan, but they're OK with that.

noname's avatar

Absolutely.

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

In the nobody gives a shit category, I just watched Season 3, Episode 8 "Ice Chips" on The Bear. Jamie Lee Curtis is nothing short of magnificent. One of the most emotional performances that I've ever seen ever. She had already won an Emmy for an earlier guest appearance on the same show called "Fishes," but I thought "Ice Chips" was even better.

Now our Halloween girl has an Oscar and an Emmy. I'm happy for her.

Rad's avatar

"Oh, and he considers the Epstein files “unreliable.” Because of course he would." - That's all I needed to read. Makes perfect sense why SCROTUS adores him.

...and on that, I just tuned out yet another day at this circus.

FukuiSanYesOta's avatar

Ahahahahaha - suffer, you UFC assclowns

https://www.yahoo.com/news/politics/articles/ufc-fighters-white-house-got-222440360.html

"UFC fighters at the White House got paid with Trump family stablecoins—but an ethics expert says a gap in the law allows this"

---

Trump's Ultimate Fighting Championship Freedom 250 spectacle on the White House South Lawn resulted in record bonuses for the winners. The fighters, though, didn't get paid in U.S. dollars, which would seem to be the obvious currency for such an event. Instead, the prize money came in the form of USD1, a type of synthetic dollar known as a stablecoin, that is run by the Trump family's cryptocurrency business, World Liberty Financial.

...

In Trump's case, that exemption allows him to take part in events that feature World Liberty Financial, which issues USD1. Stablecoins like USD1 are backed by cash and government debt, and their issuers earn interest on those reserves, turning every dollar held in tokens into a steady revenue stream.

---

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

Who is this "ethics" expert, Pam Bondi?

eppe's avatar

The true meanings of "Liberty" and "Financial" are being seriously abused here.

gallbladder's avatar

In other words, you just got fucked--royally--by speculators, you fucking geniuses.

FukuiSanYesOta's avatar

"We're giving you a million dollars!"

"In cash?"

"No, better, in USD1, the Trump Stablecoin issued by World Liberty Financial!"

"So I can sell that for dollars then, right?"

"Well, no."

"But I can switch it for ethereum or bitcoin which I can sell, right?"

"No, you can't do that"

"Did I just get fucked?"

"Yes you did. Freedom 250."

gallbladder's avatar

"But you SAID!!!1!"

gallbladder's avatar

Now look: I don't know about the rest of you, but...

That's all I had to say.

Stulexington's avatar

No, no you don't.

gallbladder's avatar

Where the hell where you in last week's meeting?

Biff52 Lost Canadian's avatar

You only just hired me tonight!

I can't take this kind of pressure.

JCfromNC's avatar

Some McSweeney's links I got today:

::

"The Art of the Nuclear Deal"

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-art-of-the-nuclear-deal

This sounds less like satire and more like just a straight reporting of what happened, minus the journalistic language.

::

"Due to a Clerical Error, Your Commencement Speaker Is A.I. Pacino"

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/due-to-a-clerical-error-your-commencement-speaker-is-ai-pacino

I was a little "meh" on this one, but I'm sharing it anyway. YMMV

::

"I Am Hummingbird, Lord of Your Doorknob"

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-am-hummingbird-lord-of-your-doorknob

//

I am very small. “Smol” in your new English, you reductive idiots. SMOL. I am the smallest dinosaur. Small as a Brazil nut. I’ve been inside a dog’s mouth. I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU.

//

Sister Artemis's avatar

I like the hummingbird one very much

JCfromNC's avatar

That one was my favorite, too.

Pauly2coffees's avatar

It’s almost Bloomsday, which also happens to be my birthday.

noname's avatar

Happy BDay tomorrow, or possibly today depending on where you are at the moment.

FrancescoTheMagnificent's avatar

Cool & congratulations!

I've never been to Dublin to do Bloomsday! But I discovered that they do a similar pilgrimage around New Orleans tracing the peregrinations of Ignatius Reilly from A Confederacy of Dunces.

https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&source=web&rct=j&url=https://deepsouthmag.com/2021/10/20/an-ignatian-journey-following-in-the-footsteps-of-a-comic-masterpiece/&ved=2ahUKEwj-p_-3hIuVAxVXk4kEHVFYEZ4Qy_kOegoIAggACAAIDRAC&opi=89978449&cd&psig=AOvVaw12UIKS2ToT-sEFvZuDDTTA&ust=1781674385290000

I myself also traced the footsteps of Hannibal Lecter around Florence & hit all of the shops, cafes & murder sites that Thomas Harris described him visiting during his time of exile following The Silence of the Lambs. The doc liked to shop. And cook...

gallbladder's avatar

Happy birthday, bubbe.

JCfromNC's avatar

Happy almost birthday!

FukuiSanYesOta's avatar

Well, happy damn birthday, friend Pauly!

gallbladder's avatar

Just looking over tonight's scores...

Dave M has a bit of explaining to do when it comes to the Feynman vs lamprey contest tonight.

Seems I thought we won...

🕊️ ꕷꖹꕷꗍ ♌'s avatar

What is the deal with Dump salivating all over muscular young men, putting his hands on them, and talking about his lust for them in public?

Marty Smit's avatar

Donnie is in the closet?

Pauly2coffees's avatar

Homosocial bonding. The presence of ladies with large breasts makes those strange feelings you get “down there” acceptable.