Dildo Enthusiast James O'Keefe Facing Criminal Investigations, Is Dildo
Dildo Enthusiast James O'Keefe Facing Criminal Investigations, Is Dildo
The "investigative journalist" is facing felony charges of being James O'Keefe.
Let’s check in on former Project Veritas head honcho James O’Keefe and his ongoing journey towards fulfilling his destiny of playing Roxie Hart in an all-male prison production of Chicago.
Old Wonkette pals Liz Farkas and Matthew Phelan, who have owned the O’Keefe beat since they were publishing exclusives for us, reported for The Nation on Friday that the dollar-store Allen Funt is under criminal investigation by the Westchester County District Attorney in New York.
The DA’s office would only confirm that there is a new investigation, but Farkas and Phelan speculate it has something to do with the financial improprieties the Veritas board accused O’Keefe of engaging in when it kicked his pimp-hatted butt to the curb a few months back:
Attorneys for Project Veritas also filed a civil complaint against O’Keefe in federal court this past May, accusing the ostensible investigative reporting outfit’s original hidden-camera sting artist of breaching his contract and fiduciary duties to the group, among other counts.
Those breaches of fiduciary duty include, among other inanities: spending $150k on high-end limo services, spending $14,000 “on a charter flight to meet someone to fix his boat under the guise of meeting with a donor” (yr Wonkette does not know what fixes his boat needed, but it would be irresponsible not to speculate that O’Keefe punched holes in the hull with a malfunctioning dildo that he lost control of during a particularly vigorous bout of self-pleasuring, ALLEGEDLY), spending $60,000 on — holy hell, how did we miss this one — “a semi-autobiographical pop music celebration of his life in muckraking” called The Project Veritas Experience (which got cancelled before its big opening in, we shit you not, a nightclub in Las Vegas), and using Veritas funds to build a music studio for one of his high-school buddies.
And we haven’t even gotten to the legal exposure O’Keefe brought on Project Veritas (Latin for bottom-feeding hose beasts) by allegedly paying people for First Daughter Ashley Biden’s stolen diary, which O’Keefe then claimed he had decided to not publish because of his overriding commitment to journalistic (HA HA HA) ethics. (HA HA HA GASP WHEEZE ANYONE HAVE AN OXYGEN TANK?)
That caper led to a federal investigation that included the FBI raiding O’Keefe’s apartment early one morning while forcing him to stand out in the hall in his underwear, and you’re welcome for that visual.
Nor have we mentioned all the money O’Keefe supposedly made Veritas spend so he could have some company staffers spend a month with him in Virginia while he starred in a summer-stock production of Oklahoma! Oh wait. We did!
This is an incredible amount of alleged financial malfeasance. O’Keefe has a ways to go before he reaches the Donald Trump tier of grifting, but he’s got the necessary levels of shamelessness and amorality lurking in his curdled little soul.
All of this is happening in the midst of a great deal of upheaval that has the future of Project Veritas shrouded in uncertainty. The organization recently appointed a new CEO in the form of Hannah Giles, who is best known for playing the hooker to O’Keefe’s Super Fly in the infamous ACORN videos that first put O’Keefe on the map.
Now Giles is apparently cleaning house, having reportedly fired nearly the entire Veritas staff. Meanwhile, in addition to the DA’s criminal inquiry and the civil complaint, the Veritas board turned over its audit of the company’s books to the same law firm that recently investigated Wayne LaPierre for the National Rifle Association. And we know how that turned out.
There is also a counter-audit into the company’s finances funded by O’Keefe and led by Ed Hulse, Veritas’s long-time tax preparer. Hulse’s audit may be trying to pin all of the company’s shady financial dealings on its CFO, Tom O’Hara, whom O’Keefe tried to fire before being forced out himself.
So yeah, it’s a giant soap opera starring some of the most vile charlatans to sully the grand stage of American life over the last decade and a half, and there has been an extraordinary number of said charlatans doing said sullying.
O’Keefe will probably survive because he is to surviving scandals what cockroaches are to surviving nuclear war. But we won’t complain if we see a few more mug shots along the way.
This guy defines the cliche of the pot and the kettle.
And what's the story on the dildos? Never mind, I'm not sure I want to know.
Fake homophobes loudly denounce the practice in immense detail, which suggests they know a great deal more about it than they should...I mean, if they think it's ghastly, why do they study it so much?
My answer has always been...they are loud homophobes to cover up their secret and potentially embarrassing personal life.
I always get amused when these clowns get nailed for getting nailed, and announce they are quitting whatever major public post they hold "for personal reflection and to spend more time with my family."
Translated, that means: "To avoid that wave of incoming snotty e-mails at my office and ridiculing Twitter posts, and to sit down with my wife and her divorce lawyer and the lawyer's private investigator's pictures of me at the Whoopee Motel with my boyfriend, where we stayed for nearly the whole hour."
Wait, how can Veritas tax preparer conduct an audit? Isn't that a giant freaking conflict of interest?