Dirty Deeds. Don: Dirt Cheap. Tabs, Thurs., Nov. 13, 2025
Morning news roundup and things to read!
Good morning pals, what are we reading today? Some tabs!
The Epstein emails. And they are … well, holy Jesus. (House)
Oh man, she’s so mad. I mean she’s always got a mad bitchface, but she’s SO SO MAD.
And yet, surprisingly, Lauren Boebert held firm; Rep. Adelita Grijalva, the 218th member to sign the Epstein Files discharge petition, has finally been sworn in, and the House will hold a vote oh maybe next month maybe, on whether to demand the release of the files.
Bill Kristol doing a little first person fiction like he’s our Gary, but he’s 100 percent correct (if, GIANT IF, Trump lives that long). Meanwhile, holy shit, Mona Charen wants Zohran Mamdani to declare an emergency and seize and raze Trump Tower. I like Mona Charen: Out of Fucks! (The Bulwark)
What does Our Liz think of Trump’s latest lawsuit, demanding a billion from the BBC? It’s probably a very good lawsuit, what what? (Public Notice)
Hmmm, was Trump’s interview with Laura Ingraham a “shocking brawl”? I don’t know, in order to know, I would have to watch it! I guess I’d best just agree with Greg Sargent! Even though his headline is kind of clickbait for a look at embracing immigration, which I keep saying is a “positive good.” (The New Republic)
A good question going around Bluesky about this report on just what shockingly fake bullshit about Portland, Oregon, Fox News was shoving down Donald Trump’s throat prior to him sending in The Troops is: Could Portland sue Fox News, Dominion-style? (Pro Publica)
But was Portland invaded by evil anarchist Santas? Yes. (Mother Jones)
Border Patrol goons can’t stop won’t stop pepper-spraying babies. (People)
The indispensable Bolts mag would like to dance some more on the political grave of the Bucks County sheriff who collaborated with ICE :) (Bolts mag)
Yes of course, Trump and his Stephen Millers et al. completely understand what “affordability” is and why it matters and how to get to it, they already did! And they’re not losing a pissed off MAGA base at all! (David Bernstein at Good Politics Bad Politics)
The AP being real mean to Trump’s “plan” (mouthfart) to give us all $2000 in tariff bribes. (AP)
Marcie keeps trying to write about this crazy Kash Patel article and the Boondoggle Ranch (LOL), and I keep having to pull her off it because more Epstein shit keeps breaking! (Gift link Wall Street Journal) But seriously it’s presumably gonna take her some time to get through those holy shit.
AOC, as per usual, es verdad. (Politico) On the other hand, wait no, it’s the same hand: “Resistance Is Exhausting.” (SER at The Play Typer Guy)
“Peter Thiel-funded wearable period tracker” sounds like the world’s greatest idea and everyone should have one! (Abortion, Every Day)
TRIGGER WARNING, JUST SKIP THIS ONE. I think what pisses me off most about this (ANOTHER) AI-cheers-on-your-child’s-suicide story is how fucking stupid its slang sounds. Am I wrong? You don’t know because you were smart and didn’t read it. (CNN)
Maybe 15,000 new homes for New York City? Zohran Mamdani ain’t even mayor yet! (Gift link New York Times)
TELL US THE SECRETS OF THE GOATS. (Reasons to Be Cheerful)
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Your hed gif info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/lady-amhersts-pheasant
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/3a183431-59f7-4c26-85dc-12bd61930950?utm_source=share
A LOT of awful shit involving terrible people coming to light in last night’s document dump, but I feel this needs more sunlight
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Jeffrey Epstein advised Steve Bannon that the lawyers representing Brett Kavanaugh in his confirmation hearing should accuse Christine Blasey Ford of being on medications that cause false memories or memory loss.
https://bsky.app/profile/snmrrw.bsky.social/post/3m5hqgclxnc2p