Djew Look Like A Tiger, Baby. Tabs, Thurs., May 23, 2024

Morning news roundup!

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

Just a refresher, Walt Nauta moved all Trump’s WHAR BOXES onto that plane to his New Jersey trash palace the day Joe Biden had poor Trump killed. (CNN) Apropos of course of this. (Politico)

This is correct, Democrats need to learn to never shut up. (Oliver Willis)

Like, Dick Durbin here? Samuel Alito hung a traitor insurrection flag, and Durbin isn’t even willing hold a hearing, much less impeach. This is … woof. (Noah Berlatsky)

Oh yeah, by the way: Sam Alito’s other white supremacist flag. (Gift link New York Times)

Also, if I were a Democrat in North Carolina, I would be SCREAMING about gubernatorial candidate/Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson’s grifty as fuck family foundation stealing taxpayer money from poor kids’ lunches, and their THREE bankruptcies in five years, when they stiffed a landlord whose wife was dying of cancer. (AP)

AP, stop it before you give that nice Jeff Tiedrich an aneurysm.

The word “Reich” is often largely associated with Nazi Germany’s Third Reich, though the references in the video Trump shared appear to be a reference to the formation of the modern pan-German nation, unifying smaller states into a single Reich, or empire, in 1871.

Stop doing that to Tiedrich’s poor brain. He already lost all his capital letters! (Jeff Tiedrich)

Buncha rightwing Republican congressmen want to take over DC’s criminal justice system just like all red state governments want to stomp the progressive prosecutors in their big cities. The really special part though is they specifically want to ban judges being able to cut young people a break — and the whole thing’s the brainchild of a congressman who was a young felon who got his sentences — plural — expunged, Byron Donalds. Man, fuck that guy. (Popular Info)

The coordinated campaign to bring chaplains into public schools ARGHHHHH. (The Split)

The coordinated campaign to buy the culture if they can’t win it. Vivek Ramaswamy’s activist stake in Buzzfeed. I will remind you, again, this is why Wonkette will never have a paywall as long as I am its king. What the fuck good is it if everything true and real is hidden from view, while Vivek Ramaswamy and Breitbart and Fox are free? (Guardian)

Garrett Bucks is such a lovely, bloody-hearted writer. He always makes me cry. I don’t believe in God and if you don’t either then Jesus shut up about it ONE TIME. We don’t *always* have to blame the religious for everything bad in the world, because it’s not fucking all of them. Some of them want all the children to get a fucking cupcake. (White Pages)

Porn sperms: NOT SACRED. (Joe. My. God.)

Relevant! Ted Cruz and Katie Britt’s “IVF Protection” bill … allows states to restrict IVF. (Abortion, Every Day)

Jonathan Last on Frank (“Not Ratso”) Rizzo, the worst of the big city mayors, and why do we feel like we’ve seen that guy before? (The Bulwark)

The Senate polls look good actually, turn around and spit three times. (Five-Thirty-Eight)

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