227 Comments
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Bitter Scribe's avatar

Jeanine Pirro may not be very good at getting convictions, but she's a superstar at overturning them.

Khavrinen's avatar

Will all these vacated convictions include the ones they've been charged with *since* January 6th?

Because a lot of them have all new criming to be "pardoned" for.

Bitter Scribe's avatar

One guy who was caught molesting children actually tried to argue that his J6 pardon covered that charge too. The court said nuh-uh, nice try.

Hank Napkin's avatar

"They shall take their rightful place beside Benedict Arnold, James Wilkinson, Alrdich Ames and other American Heroes"

Thixotropickle's avatar

Trumphole 2.0: "Tough On Criming*"

*Actual toughness on purported crimings may vary, see your local voting booth for proper response.

Khavrinen's avatar

"Tough on the Crimes committed by anyone we don't like", that is.

Nora's avatar

Well, I guess doj is timing it right for the terror guys to get the band together and plan for the mid terms.

Stephen St John's avatar

And once they get their guns back I suppose the government will give each of them a few million bucks to compensate them for the mean way they've been treated.

Kate's avatar

I'm so weary of living in the Upside Down.

Runfastandwin's avatar

If this actually happens the next Democrat needs to reinstate both the convictions and sentences. Double Jeopardy be damned. Make them sue us for a change.

Hollysdower's avatar

I bet that JanuaryClaire has a picture of Linus in a tie working on a computer

HarryButtle, degenerate artist's avatar

This story is fucking infuriating.

As they round up immigrant kids and abuelas claiming to be tough on crime, this is what they're doing to actual terrorists. A lot of them will end up back in jail...but some folks are gonna get unnecessarily hurt/killed in the meantime. Possibly even law enforcement.

JunkYardDogg's avatar

My Q-dar tells me that it is absolutely no coincidence that Punch Drunk Pirro filed those motions to vacate the convictions of the enemy combatants at the same time that Toady Tom Lyons turned in his ICE resignation papers . Solved that problem. Trump found a suitable group of violent thugs to take Lyons place to run his own private Trumpstapo army. Just in time to fuck with the MidTerms. Now, Stink Eye Stew, the Oaf Keepers & The Pud Boys can renew their reign of terror on America.

Michael's avatar

In other news, Judge Boasberg gets trampled on again by two Trump appointees on the DC Circuit. Neomi Rao auditioning for a SCOTUS seat?

https://chrisgeidner.substack.com/p/dc-circuit-trump-appointees-again?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=email

EyeQueue's avatar

We should have Reconstructed the motherfuck out of these bucketheads when we had the chance. Until they HOWLED AND CRIED FOR MERCY!

I hope we have another chance.

Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

So the plan is to un-convict people involved in a coup attempt and give them their guns back… and we’re calling that “justice” now, got it

At this point the only thing missing is a loyalty rewards program.

VwllssWndr's avatar

The "loyalty rewards.program" is the out of court settlements they'll get when they sue the federal government for being locked up in the first place. Can't wait for my tax money to go compensate for the emotional distress of fucking traitors.

Thesaurus Wrecks's avatar

Is starving our troops part of the warrior ethos?

Families Share Pics of Paltry Meals From Soldiers Aboard US Warships

https://www.mediaite.com/media/news/families-share-pics-of-paltry-meals-from-soldiers-aboard-us-warships/

BoB the TacoɔɒT, Tumbrel Pilot's avatar

Where'd all that steak and lobster go, Petey? The men are getting surly.

Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

It's almost like the hegseth-military-complex is trying to go full Putin.

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

Welcome to the Underfyre Festival.

TakingAmes's avatar

Please collect your internet at the cost check.

PrimerGray's avatar

"Lean" is the first word in "lean, mean, fighting machine."

VwllssWndr's avatar

NO CHICKS

NO HOMOS

NO FATTIES

PrimerGray's avatar

<Once the requests from “US Attorney for DC Jeanine Pirro” — a phrase that still makes us snort-laugh in disbelief — are approved, they’ll erase the only remaining criminal convictions of people involved in the January 6 coup attempt/tourist visit.>

I'm sure it will be fine. The requests were drafted by Ernest and Julio.