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AboveTheGrayFog's avatar

"So the possibility of watching Jordan sit through 15 humiliating rounds of voting while groveling at the feet of Matt Gaetz"

I'd like to see him sit through those rounds of voting FOREVER.

Meanwhile Hakeem Jefferies can handle all the duties of speaker that come his way.

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Get Out! Stay Out! 2024's avatar

"Yelling fidget spinner". Thanks for that.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

"Who, somebody once said, has a Glock in that Chanel bag."

You can't be tough without a gun with these people.

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Marla's avatar

Gym Jordan is respected BY ALL?

Oh sure, if by ALL, Fat Nixon means the inhabitants of the cray cray ward at Bellevue, assorted mole rats who live under the IRT, and a few miscellaneous wharf dwellers at the old piers.

Depends on what he means by ALL.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

What's this about the mole rats now?

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DemoCat's avatar

THE most critical issue for the House is what effect the next Speaker will have on the war in Ukraine. Jim Jordan must answer these questions - “will you allow Russia to submit the free, democratic people of Ukraine to Putin’s will by force? Will you end the vital support that is surely preventing Russia from expanding its homeland by way of war? If so, what responsibility do you and the gop accept for jeopardizing the freedom of other neighboring nations and free people? And what becomes of the millions of people in Ukraine who must accept Putin’s tyranny or risk their life and Liberty?” Watch Jordan sputter something about “southern border” or our “woke” military. Putin is going to decide whether to suspend his reign of terror or to kill thousands of people defending their country based on what America does next. Do we end the war in favor of Ukraine by pledging to supply as much money and resources as necessary, or do we end the war in favor of Russia by pulling back or stopping our support? Putin is a madman every bit as greedy and evil as so many dictators before him, never satisfied to govern and lead their own country. Germany was a growing nation and economy in the late 30’s with its own cosmopolitan metropolis in Berlin. Hitler presided over a growing nation, when he chose to indulge his dark impulses and invade Poland, intent on consuming all of Europe and even the world. He left Germany in rubble. Putin is following a very similar playbook, and history is being written now.

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Revenant's avatar

Wait, stop laughing- Gym Jordan is "RESPECTED BY ALL"?!?!

Just who is this ALL, "Your Favorite President"? 9 out of 10 syphilitic brainworms? ALL the voices in your head, at least all the ones who aren't shouting "KILL KILL KILL!" or "N_____, N_____, N_____,"!! Maybe all the other coaches who've been caught doing what they should not. Certainly isn't ANYONE of my acquaintance, but then I avoid contact with the lower forms of life, mostly.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

I like how he so very often uses the style: "I, Donald Trump, your favorite president." As though his followers might think: "Huh, who is this Trump guy again?"

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Revenant's avatar

Is it for their edification, or just another usage of the Big Lie technique? You know, repeat a whopper until it becomes a commonly accepted truth. That, in addition to the endless self promotion of this, the neediest black hole of fragile self-regard in human history.

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Mr. Knows Nothing, et. al.'s avatar

I thought Mr. Legum was doing his regular mocking of the martini swiller, but was being quite clever by making it look like she really said that--when in fact, she didn't.

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm really cut out for reality.

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Mark Linimon's avatar

Reality? Assumes facts not in evidence.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

We'd all like our own private Barbie-Land.

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Catman's avatar

One of those very, very short lists: Jim Jordan's legislative record--that's right, exactly ZERO bills authored

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Rooster Cogburn's avatar

I heard that Boebert was too busy to run for Speaker. She had her hands full, if you’ll pardon the expression

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

They say that watching legislators craft laws is like watching them make sausage...

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

“Grimly hilarious” is absolutely how I feel about this entire legislative dumpsterfire shitshow on steroids. It’s so funny yet “funny” to watch them try to burn our democracy to the ground…

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

They are not here to amuse us.

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Jim Parker's avatar

I must have started drinking exceptionally early on the day Gym was given a Presidential Medal of Freedom and missed this travesty. What an appalling insult to previous recipients who actually deserved such high recognition for accomplishments that befitted their contributions to society. Gym didn't even have the integrity, moral fortitude, or simple human decency to help some of his former wrestling athletes who came to him with accusations of sexual abuse at UWM. Duh-nald's effusive praise of Gym is disgustingly on brand. I'm sure it's the result of of Gym happily and enthusiasticly tugging the mushroom head of Dear Leader. Fuck them both.

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Jim Parker's avatar

Oops. Apologies to UWM, and condolences to The Ohio State University for the confusion of sexual abuse accusations.

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Will's avatar

Phone flasher Matt Gaetz, investigated for dispensing ecstasy and boinking an under age girl (allegedly!) must be thrilled at the prospect of Blind-Eye Jordon, who managed to be looking the other way (allegedly!) when 153 male athletes were probed and prodded at Ohio State where he was an assistant coach, as Speaker. According to Marc Short, former chief of staff for Mike Pence and therefore unimpeachable when it comes to transgressions, quoted in the Daily Beast, “Matt Gaetz, to say he came here as a fiscal crusader—it’s more likely he came here for the teenage interns on Capitol Hill, to be honest.” What a team they're going to be!

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DrBDH's avatar

Christ, I feel bad for all decent UW Madison alums, faculty and employees. Such a stain on a fine institution.

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Vic's avatar

So he went to a no-name law school and he likes to roll around on plastic mats with sweaty men. Fine. Sounds like a good Republican. Trump's kid of guy. Whatever.

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Zap's avatar

PAB is already trying to figure out how to throw Gym Jordan under all the busses.

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Secret Agent Super Dragon's avatar

It’s kind of amazing the media still takes the Republican Party seriously when Drunk Aunt Peggy can get a column out of “You know who the Republican Party needs? Nancy Pelosi, that’s who”

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Bruce's avatar

She honestly thinks there could be some magical Republican version of Nancy Smash out there (that no one has ever seen, somehow) who will come riding in like a dreamy Ronny Ray-Gun to save the day.

Without ever ONCE stopping to realize that the modern GOP is essentially nothing more than a large number of syphilitic rabid weasels stuffed five at a time into badly fitting human suits and are constitutionally incapable behaving 'responsibly'.

(and any that try are immediately attacked and torn into bloody gobbets by their fellow syphilitic rabid weasels at the slightest hint of apostasy like "daring to work with a Democrat" or "recognizing that the current obsessions of the GOP are nothing more than hallucinations brought on by ingesting massive quantities of home-made bath salts"

Standard GOP Strong Daddy syndrome.

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Robert Eckert's avatar

Syphilitic rabid weasel libelz!

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