200 Comments

There he goes, acting all presidential again!

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Ted Cruz was conceived on the grassy knoll...and born nine month later in Canada. I saw this written in the sky. It's true.

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I saw him "Whitewater" rafting in Arkansas! OMG!

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"Rodham" is the Americanized form of "Ruby". She's Jackie Ruby.

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This election campaign could only be better if Hillary had dragons.

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This is so unbelievable!Do you expect me to believe that anyone actually needs to expend effort to make up stories to convince people how terrible Ted Cruz is??

That's a hell of a long way to go to say "water is wet," Enquirer.

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Well, Saskatoon, yeah...

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Now you know one of the reasons I don't drink. Haven't had that problem since I stopped. ;)

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WOW! So it's true: Trump is an idiot. And may get the nukular launch codes in less than one year.

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Praying for death probably

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You guys forgot to report on Carly Fiorina's connection to space Nazis. Alleged connection, I mean.**space Nazis are notoriously litigious when it comes to damaging their reputation.

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^^^This, my friends, and only this.

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She also did Pearl Harbor!

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Luckily he will immediately forget where he put them and blame it on Melanoma, or, um, whatever her name is.I forget.

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So they're like $cientologists?

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With better publicists and tentacles, yes.

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