604 Comments
User's avatar
Martini Glambassador's avatar

Ta-da, tamarin! Evolution went a little crazy with variations on a theme with this bunch. https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/treetop-tamarin-toddler

And your meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/85d7c275-9476-47a8-aa72-d794d4d1d2ba

Runfastandwin's avatar

The Monkey likes

to fling his poo

and you better duck

or he’ll aim at you

Skye Marthaler's avatar

Yo! Hey! You! Did I ever tell you about my cousin, he became sort of famous. His stage name was the Lorax...some doctor even wrote a book about him!

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

Cutie pie

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

Mini Lorax with a different color scheme!

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Little monkey in a tree, little monkeys, it’s no doubt, little monkeys weird me out. Burma shave!

OneYieldRegular's avatar

Tarmarin and tamarin and tarmarin

Creeps in the pretty place from day to day.

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

I had to memorize this for class back in about 1964.

Menotsure's avatar

A tamarin's a monkey

A tamarind's a fruit

One is sweet and sour

The other small and cute.

Les Bontemps's avatar

Ogden Nash, is that you?

Thalia Is Not Amused's avatar

What a fine compliment! I agree, he's quite the quip.

Menotsure's avatar

Thanks, dearie.

Menotsure's avatar

I should be so good,

Jjamie's avatar

Actually, I beg to differ. I live for your daily poem!

Ted Cruz's Beard's avatar

The Lorax!

Miss Grundy's avatar

Not to be confused with tamarind. Un monito lindo.

Good morning!

tehbaddr's avatar

Mustached Minkey!

jltympanum's avatar

That's not my dog.

OneYieldRegular's avatar

The Wilford Brimley of the animal kingdom.

The Wanderer's avatar

Whee!

Jen Is Journalisming's avatar

Evolution-Gone-Wild

Show us your tamarins!

Linda1961 aka Pollyanna's avatar

Babby tamarin may be a monkey, but is curious as a kitty.

The Estivating Hibernian's avatar

Vox Beastie Boys:

'Stache monkey!

That funky monkey junkie!"

eddi-SABH's avatar

"You have 30 seconds to comply." Bang. Bang. Bang. etc

PuraVida's avatar

You had me at little fascist piss trough.

The Mighty Ox's avatar

Remember about four years ago, when people were upset about a salty Turkish steakhouse proprietor touching the World Cup trophy? We were so happy and innocent then.

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

A slight correction to your last Tab, Evan.

JD Vance did not reproduce. Usha Vance reproduced. The child isn't white.

AppleScruff's avatar

What's even funnier about the World Cup is that the Argentine president is so superstitious that he never goes to big games. Guess even him staying home can't overcome the Trump Curse.

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

"an encyclopedic mind." Which would be great, if it weren't a poorly done forgery of the ninth edition of the Encyclopaedia Britannica, most of the volumes missing, and those that aren't have been almost entirely destroyed by mold and mildew. While it is technically possible to read some of what remains, you are likely to end up with aspergillosis.

Khavrinen's avatar

"Speaking of, surprise, the FBI is no longer going to be investigating ICE murders."

Why waste all that time and effort investigating, when everybody already knows what conclusions they're going to come to before they even start?

Anzu's avatar

We've been trying to identify the source of a tiny little beetle infestation in the house. Well, this morning, I found it - they'd gotten into the bag of bird seed that was just sitting by the back door and had turned it into an incubator. I sprayed the interior of a plastic trash bag with the good bug killer, dumped the entire bag of bird seed into it, tied it shut, and dropped it into our outside rubbish bin wholesale. Then sprayed it down again for good measure. Then sprayed down the area around where the bird seed had been sitting with the pet safe bug spray, and I'll give it another day to finish the job.

Tomorrow I'll do some decluttering along that wall, followed by a deep vacuum of the dead corpses, then a sweep and mop of the whole house.

At least it wasn't roaches this time. We've got one of them in the garage now and I've screamed like a little girl each time I see it because I have a phobia. The big traps aren't big enough for palmetto bugs....

jltympanum's avatar

"Donald Trump found a way to be pathetic and embarrassing during the ceremony afterward". Even more so than usual. If that is even possible.

After Roosevelt's 4 terms, the 22d Amendment was added to the Constitution, limiting presidents to 2 terms. There is no reason why there can't be a 28th Amendment, limiting the presidency to persons of sound mind, and of above-average intelligence, both of which to be determined by an impartial examination by qualified psychologists.

ConorFusbol's avatar

I will always love Madrid, and Spain, for this statue to Lucifer I stumbled on one day while I was eating my lunch:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuente_del_%C3%81ngel_Ca%C3%ADdo

Cincinnatus's avatar

Ka$h Patel on Sunday dropped a celebratory promo video applauding himself and his bureau for getting “it done” at the World Cup. Vanity Fair’s Washington correspondent Aidan McLaughlin, wrote that the “dramatic” promo video was further evidence of his role in an “influencer administration.” [HuffPost]

https://xcancel.com/FBIDirectorKash/status/2078996853618835637

Littorally Speaking's avatar

Nancy Guthrie has entered the ch—OH WAIT.

Shallow state's avatar

Unexpectedly, I am forced to agree with RFK, Jr.: The Encyclopedia of Stupidity.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1861892314?lv=shuf&channelId=500&plpRedirect=mhFallback

*In short sections with such titles as ‘The Blunderers’ Club’, ‘Fools in Hell’, ‘Genealogy of Idiots’, and ‘The Aesthetics of the Empty Gesture’, stupidity is analysed on the basis of fairy tales, cartoons, triumphal arches, garden architecture, Baroque ceilings, jokes, flimsy excuses and science fiction."

Ward From Cali's avatar

If Trump has an "encyclopedic" mind, it's an old World Book after the bindings have been cut off in order to pulp the things. Not only is it irrelevant and mostly outdated, but also totally random.

But does this mean we can call him Enciclopedia Brownpants, now?

Sister Artemis's avatar

My inner nine year old, a huge EB fan, is offended by your vague association between that brilliant (and generally kind) kid and The Orange Embarrassment.

clairence's avatar

why do so many of the people around him say he has an encyclopedic mind when clearly he struggles with coherent thought? Maybe they mean his knowledge of things is roughly a paragraph or two each, and organized alphabetically.

Littorally Speaking's avatar

Have you ever watched one of his “cabinet meetings”?

Unrestrained tongue massages of Shitler’s prostate is a competitive sport in this regime; the word “ obsequious” doesn’t even begin to adequately describe it.

Randy Bender's avatar

Just wait til these sycophants get going with the shameless flattery about Emperor Enshitticus's new clothes, another parable about which they have zero knowledge.

DV Thrombossa Nova's avatar

Encyclopedic: dusty, closed, untouched.