Even Russian Media Can't Tell Trump's '$50 Million For Bomb Condoms For Hamas!' Lie Without Laughing
Explosive orgasms if true!
One of our favorite (current) Trump/MAGA lies is the one that Elon Musk’s DOGE has discovered that “We’re sending $50 MILLION! Worth of CONDOMS! To HAMAS! To MAKE BOMBS!” You almost don’t care the exact derivation of the lie, what line item Fox News and the rest of the the MAGA media are purposefully lying about, which is then downloaded into Donald Trump’s mangled dementia brain for him to hallucinate about all by his lonesome.
The other day he turned it into $100 million. Why? Because he’s a liar, and because he gets confused easily.
By the way, he’s getting confused more and more easily these days, and it’s getting more and more embarrassing. That whole thing about the tariffs, when he humiliated himself by immediately backing down and letting Mexico and Canada regift presents they gave Joe Biden and calling it “victory”? The whole thing where he started babbling about developing Gaza like it was one of his roach motels in Atlantic City, only to have even his buttsniffing Republicans in Congress be (mostly) like “Oh noooooo, Grandpa, let’s put you back on top of your bedpan” and his own White House officials have spent the time ever since trying to walk it back?
Is there any way the rumor about Trump’s Cabinet getting together to Article 25 the old bitch just as soon as the last member is confirmed is not true? Lord, at least President JD Vance can mentally grasp the details of the terrorist attack Apartheid bin Laden is currently carrying out against the United States. Trump? All he knows is that it involves these newfangled computers all the kids are asking Santa to bring them.
They’re sending $50 MILLION! In CONDOMS! To HAMAS! They’re using them to MAKE BOMBS!
It’s that last part that kills us. It’s not just one of those “$70,000 for transgender comic in Peru!” lies about USAID that’s designed to hit all their followers’ bigot prostate spots, the part that hates trans people, the part that hates people who speak Spanish, the part that doesn’t know where “Peru” is but is definitely sure it’s past Walmart, the direction good Christian MAGA people don’t dare to go.
How, sir? How do you think bombs are made? How are they using the condoms to make bombs? Did the box say something about “explosive orgasms”?
One entity that’s usually prepared to babble out any stupid lie Trump comes up with can’t keep a straight face with this one, and no, we’re not talking about White House Nazi Barbie Karoline Leavitt. She’s dutifully repeating it, because she’s that kind of a shameless MAGA trash liar.
We are talking about Russian state-owned media, specifically RT.
Alina Habba, a different White House Nazi Barbie from Leavitt — there are many of them! — had just dutifully ralphed up the lie to Jesse Watters on Fox News. “We’ve seen $50 million to Gaza for condoms that they’re using for bombs.” OK, Alina, but next time with passion!
She said it in the course of trying to defend Trump’s dementia idea about stealing Gaza and turning it into the “Riviera of the Middle East.” She said Democrats should support it, “IF THEY CARE ABOUT WORLD PEACE!” and if they care about stopping “DEI plays and operas in Colombia!” and also the successful Condoms-For-Bombs program.
And Russian media was like … ehhhhhhhhh, excellent Russian journalists cannot even with this one!
RT News wrote that Habba's comment “leans on debunked claim USAID was sending $50m to embattled enclave for ‘bomb-making condoms.’” It added, “It was to Gaza in Africa.”
And Julia Davis, Daily Beast reporter and prolific watchdog of the Russian state media, tweeted, “I’ve lived long enough to see RT fact check Alina Habba.”
Even then RT doesn’t quite have it right, or at least elides its usual commitment to thorough factchecking. But saying “it was Gaza in Africa” is a piece of the truth about the origin story of this particular bullshit, if you are curious. There is a province in Mozambique called “Gaza” — kind of like how there is a Paris in Tennessee and a Rome in Georgia! — and it was the recipient of foreign aid, though “condoms” don’t actually appear in there, so the DOGE incels are either lying or they’re just ignorant.
Forsooth, as the president of Refugees International explained on Twitter:
But yes, if there is any sort of kernel of an origin for this, it is about the Gaza province of Mozambique:
According to the HHS grants database, the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation in Mozambique received more than $83m in funding since 2021 for reproductive health projects in two provinces: Inhambane and Gaza.
They’re putting the condoms on the DOGS! They’re putting the condoms on the CATS! They’re putting the condoms on the people who LIVE THERE!
And they’re making BOMBS OUT OF THEM!
See? We can still laugh about and mock these dumbass motherfuckers in the regular way that doesn’t feel totally like the Apocalypse.
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$50 MILLION! In CONDOMS!
Shoot, a guy can have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all of that!
They call it "jizzkreig".