91 Comments

But the stakes are so high!

Expand full comment

I thought that was the lottery.

Expand full comment

the roumanian stakes, even.

Expand full comment

Keep it up long enough and it turns into a religion.

Expand full comment

Donald Trump would have swindled them out of thousands AND made them fill out an evaluation giving his swindle a positive grade...rank amateur.

Expand full comment

If she's petite, though, she'd be a small medium at large...

Expand full comment

I guess if you believe in this sort of thing sooner or later you're going to get souled out.

Expand full comment

It would have been a neat sleight of hand, that...

Expand full comment

This is slightly OT, but I've been dying to post this since Sunday and this is the most relevant Wonkette post all week so...

Expand full comment

It's as old as, if Anu doesn't get a cut of the harvest, don't expect the rain to fall next year.

Expand full comment

Right, never burned her. They also didn't really think she was a witch, they just used some archaic law that they forgot to scrub.

Expand full comment

One bad apple does not define the entire profession. I have worked many years as a personal exorcist. First off, I make no claims about removing demons. That's just a bunch of hokum.

I work with your demons to improve their core, get them in shape and help them to be the best demon they can be; with a proven formula of diet, exercise and spirituality (or lack thereof). I guarantee that once your demon feels good about itself and builds confidence, you're going to feel a lot better about your possession.

Take Charlie, for example. Charlie was possessed by a fat, slovenly demon that made him gay, atheistic and a Democrat. I worked with his demon to tighten its abs, strengthen its core and improve its outlook on eternal damnation. Today Charlie is a registered Independent! He's still a gay atheist, but he's okay with that and so is his demon.

They're very happy together. So I'd call that a small miracle.

Expand full comment

Now now Corey, he could have also been talking about River Phoenix

Expand full comment

These people are monsters. They should be treated as such.

Expand full comment