472 Comments
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William Donnell's avatar

Yes, the connectivity between cat and tail is routed through the base of the tail aka the Fat End (like a pool cue). When swinging a cat, always grab the fat end because cats have no problem reaching the skinny end with their pointy parts.

What is not well-known is who is in charge. It is the tail, which manifests its will through the cat. From ass revving to headbonking, the tail makes its calculations, decides, and transmits its will to the cat via the Fat End.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

I would never advocate swinging a cat, though!

satch's avatar

Our cats love skritches at the base of the tail

tehbaddr's avatar

The hinie scritch

William Donnell's avatar

That's how they gitcha.

William Donnell's avatar

No indeed. In fact, don't even touch the Fat End because that makes 'em crazy. I know, I know: short drop.

Menotsure's avatar

My parents bought me a parrot when I was kid. He was the smartest animal that I have ever

owned. He was also kind of goofy. My mom had him out of his cage to clean it and my dad came home, opened the front door and he went out of that door like a bullet, never to be seen again.

Shocktreatment's avatar

I would occasionally bird sit an Amazon Red of ~65 years. You'd have needed dynamite to get him out of the house...

They are terribly smart and not afraid to hold a grudge, either...

James's avatar

Looking at how poofed out that tail is, that cat is running at the red line! Cinnamon used to poof like that, which was more noticeable with her than most because she was so slender that her porcupine act practically doubled her size.

Damn, I miss that cat.

tehbaddr's avatar

Yes I am still here birb.

Shocktreatment's avatar

"𝘐'𝘮 not thinking about birdmurder, not 𝘮𝘦! Why do you ask?"

The Scots word 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘬𝘪𝘵 seems like it was coined for certain cats...

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

The parrot is a brat. What cool photos inside! My dentist has just got those things.

helenasgarden's avatar

I'm betting on the bird.

Bobathonic's avatar

It's like birb is checking to see if the monster is gone.

Easterncedar's avatar

Playing peek-a-birb

Jen Lacks a Domesticated Bone's avatar

that birb is 100% doing taunting on purpose.

Now you see me! Now you don't! cackle cackle

eppe's avatar

Parrots can be real assholes.

James's avatar

Pinin' for the fjords!

Noma Larkey's avatar

I love the 'Peek-a-boo' action! I play 'peek-a-boo' with my hound sometimes and he comes to chase me! I'm still a kid when it comes to animals.

Jen Lacks a Domesticated Bone's avatar

I do it with my cats. They are surprised every time! I am like guys, I do this every day. Why are you still surprised?

Jen Lacks a Domesticated Bone's avatar

The FAA malarky zapped tabs!

Noma Larkey's avatar

It screwed up the DFW air traffic (both airports) then we had late afternoon T-storms in the area to throw on top of it. Sure glad I wasn't traveling yesterday!

Bobathonic's avatar

I was, and I had no issues. But then I flew through Charlotte.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

Couchy is at peak repulsiveness, he is a rat without a corner to be cornered in.

Resource NW's avatar

JV- Fart left is when the poor schmuck standing behind and to the the left of the convicted felon suddenly looks like they DO NOT WANT TO BREATHE. Spoiler? It is not a fart.

GiggleSnort's avatar

"Fart left?" What is he, 10 years old? Or is this just another way he emulates his orange-hued Leader, who is also hurling grade-school insults?

tehbaddr's avatar

Keep shopping, and don't be afraid to give into panic buying.

Schmannity's avatar

I just said Shart Right. It was not an accident.

Rosy red ASS's avatar

I'm not ready for a post about "president" diaper pants. Here are some new earrings I did yesterday. https://substack.com/profile/157182336-rosy-red-ass/note/c-343072020?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2lkyo0

SkeptiKC's avatar

Beautiful!

I particularly fancy the pair on the right.

Why So Lugubrious?'s avatar

JD Vance is not very good at this.

Rosy red ASS's avatar

A pile of donkey shit has more charisma!

Trespassers Will's avatar

Trump TV on YouTube. Comments are turned off. Shocker.

Hops: grrr mad's avatar

Currently showing one of his lie-fests. Mind-numbingly stupid. Every sentence a lie, and they eat it up.

Lance Thrustwell's avatar

That's too bad. I might get on there just to log some comments from the screaming mouth of Hell.

...After I logged into a VPN, that is. You might say I don't trust those assholes.

Rosy red ASS's avatar

Thin skinned, diaper baby, dumbass orange MOTHERFUCKER.

Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

All those human props holding “defend our future” signs behind JD Vance puts me in mind of my 11 month old granddaughter and yes, her future needs to be defended from YOU.

Richard S's avatar

For a moment there, I read that as "Defend Our Furniture".........

Oy!'s avatar

Who holds an 'opening ceremony' for a helipad?? Needy much? 🤪

Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

It’s the best helipad. All the dictators have one.

Monsieur Grumpe's avatar

Trump TV. What an original title.

How about one of those 3 letter acronyms?

WTF TV would work.

freakishlystrong's avatar

Sadly, ALL TV is "Trump TV." We can't get a fucking moment of anything else.

Lblomg's avatar

Trump America network TAN

William Donnell's avatar

If Gunney Hartman were here, Pyotr's stinky warfighters would have some god-damned discipline. Like so:

"FART LEFT

FART RIGHT

BRING IT ON DOWN

BEDEL DU

You're bouncing!"

freakishlystrong's avatar

“It’s interesting ’cause they said they were gonna boycott me, but they never boycott me,” he said at Gracie Mansion. “So, I wasn’t very worried about that. Look at all that press.”

THIS is why "the press" needs to evaporate until HE behaves.

Rosy red ASS's avatar

Good morning. I worked on jewelry all day and ignored "Trump TV". As an aside, I've been calling the "news" the Trump Show since 2016.