704 Comments
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Martini Glambassador's avatar

You’re soaking in a hed gif Palmolive advert. The source details and a bit about actress Jan Miner here: https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/madge-hand-shaming-for-over-a-quarter

Sister Artemis's avatar

Madge!

Eva, Iron Goddess of Mercy's avatar

I hated this commercial when I was a kid because doing the dishes was MY job, never my siblings', and I hated and resented it. I especially hated the smell of dish washing soap, and of course knew that the whole thing was bullshit. Thank goodness for dishwashers! I haven't done a dish in years.

tehbaddr's avatar

Oh Martini! This gif is amazing!

"Geez, that's a little rude" You're such a bitch Madge!

Lascauxcaveman's avatar

Through ingesting my daily dose of TABS, I'm thinking that Martini Ambassador is the best short form writer on the staff.

Joe Bacon's avatar

What a family! Madge the Manicurist was married to Mr. Charmin Squeezing Whipple and their daughter is Flo the Progressive Insurance Spokeslady!

Pere Ubu's avatar

Where do the Charmin Poop Bears fit in?

Queroloustwo's avatar

There having LeMu Emu over for dinner.

Stuart's avatar

Clever, but an awful lot of Wonkette readers are betraying their age.

Gammarae's avatar

are you suggesting there's a problem with that?

:)

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Madge! So polished.

Alpaca Suitcase's avatar

File that one under "Brilliant!"

Menotsure's avatar

Once again, you nailed it.

Menotsure's avatar

I knew you would.

abbienormal's avatar

When I was young, I thought that the commercial was real. That it was a good idea to soak your fingers in dishwashing detergent. Mom had to sit me down and explain that it was all hogwash.

avidlurker's avatar

There were girls in our neighborhood soaking their hands in Palmolive.

bluePNWcats's avatar

I know my sister and I did it.

Shocktreatment's avatar

I always use dish soap when cleaning the hogs...

glenglish's avatar

So did you try soaking your hands in hogwash?

Jezdukowski's avatar

Bacon grease. I was the best friend of all the neighborhood dogs.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

Oh, I’m sure you weren’t the only kid that tried that.

Sadly Practical's avatar

We only bought Joy but I’m pretty sure I whined for Palmolive at the grocery store. I think those commercials were designed for preschoolers.

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

I wanted to try it!

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

"You ladies will have beautiful hands if you skip the salon and get to scrubbing some dishes. And make me a sammich while you're in there."

bluePNWcats's avatar

It was genius propaganda, that's a fact. Lol

Pope Buck I's avatar

I'll bet Taylor Swift NEVER washes dishes. If only someone would tell her she's missing her chance to be a REAL woman.

bluePNWcats's avatar

I'll bet her sammich making numbers are fairly low as well. Good. That's what I call progress. ❣️

glenglish's avatar

She can't be a Ma'am cuz she doesn't smoke the same cigarettes as me...

DDB9000's avatar

Tell me what can a poor girl do, but to play for an NFL team...

Babe Paley's avatar

I love me some Madge. I like an Eve Arden-style wisecracking yet sympathetic dame!

JustPixelz's avatar

Good one, 'Tini!

Froglooksfunny's avatar

Wonderful, as always!,

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

A nail salon with my Grandma's cuckoo clock. Weird.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

How else are the advert writers gonna get in a good hand joke and then a good cuckoo joke?

But seriously, how those guys came up with 27 years of hand gags, it’s impressive when you think about it. I’m imagining plenty of FML moments in the staff room.

bluePNWcats's avatar

Wow, back then everyone was getting handsy at work. Like a whole world of Boeberts. 😁

Babe Paley's avatar

I bet there was some "hand job" based ribaldry as it was getting late and they were facing a deadline.

Joe's avatar

Can I ask a dumb question? I'm newish to Wonkette, and I've noticed that sometimes the Tabs headline has a matching article, and sometimes it doesn't. Like today, there's no article about 5 people who didn't win a Grammy. At least, not that I can see. Am I missing something? Thanks!

Spleen Victoria's avatar

I adore Ms. Mitchell, local woman, because she is just so blunt about how awesome she is and calls bullshit on anyone who calls her immodest or suggests it’s unseemly. If you’re a living music legend and you wrote so many songs that you sleep on a giant pile of riches like Smaug and you boinked anyone worth boinking in the 60’s and 70’s…well, it ain’t bragging if it’s true.

LuluBean12 StarGeezer's avatar

I love love love her music even though her life in the 60s is so different than mine was.

Like Sci Fi to me. You can somehow still feel her songs strongly.

marcia cannon's avatar

The chicken shawarma recipe is paywalled. Sad.

Pere Ubu's avatar

Yesterday on Knowledge Fight, Dan had a clip of Alex Jones doing his RAWR AM VRY SERIUS thing concerning parents of trans kids, and immediately pivoting from that to "alright, I'm out of time" thereby, as Dan points out, invalidating the supposed fury of Alex's previous five or so minutes, and gosh, I don't know WHY that's coming to mind when I think of the GOP on the issue of border security. It's a mystery!

GrannysKnitting's avatar

"Nikki Haley is having to seek Secret Service protection because of threats from people low enough to respect Donald Trump." at this point the secret service probably have a standard, pre filled form for that

defpac's avatar

Now, thats a slogan I can support.

https://twitter.com/afalkhatib/status/1754933437499375642

From the river to the sea, only peace will set us free

TalentNotAutotune's avatar

PAB is in deep doo-doo - even deeper than we thought. His CFO, Allen Weisselberg, is in talks with DA. Alvin Bragg to admit to perjury. This caught the attention of Judge Engoron, who said that he needs to know more. In fact, he needs to know whether or not he should invoke the "if you lied about one thing, you lied about everything" judicial precept.

That would be EXTREMELY BAD for PAB. And not for just one reason, but for about 370,000,000 reasons.

subterrene's avatar

Today James O'Keefe had to publicly admit he and Project VeritASS lied about election fraud in Pennsylvania! It's a good day.

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

OT: A federal Appeals Court gave Jack Smith a huge win in his arguments that a former POTUS can face charges from subversion of the 2020 election. I imagine Trump will now file at the SCOTUS and he will probably lose there as well.

The G-7 Experience's avatar

O,, well everything I clicked had a pay-wall...good times!

HooverVilles's avatar

Brane Klenzer courtesy of HRS Findus.

NB: I used superscript to indicate a higher pitch sound.

https://substack.com/profile/157525103-hoovervilles/note/c-48956775?r=2lsb5b

M-X's avatar

News:

Jeff Tiedrich

@itsJeffTiedrich

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha no immunity for you, fuckface ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha oops I mean how terrible for Donald Trump

https://x.com/itsJeffTiedrich/status/1754889063675363702?s=20

ZorPern's avatar

I am seriously questioning the bias of this man !!!

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

The worst time line? You’re soaking in it.

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

Donald Trump is very sad about King Charles’s cancer, and also it looks like there’s ketchup caked on his caps lock and he can’t unstick it

To be far, Trump says everything at the top of his lungs out of his disgusting Big Mac hole so the Cap locks kind of makes sense for his “sympathy note” to King Charles. I have no doubt that’s exactly how loud he said it in person.

Sleepmonger's avatar

Well, KC can't hear him all the way across the ocean if he doesn't shout.

defpac's avatar

Biiiiiiig leeeegalz.

Unless I read this wrong, the appeals court upholds Chutkin, and the case is unstayed, for now.

Now pray that SCOTUS goes: GFY Trump.

https://twitter.com/steve_vladeck/status/1754889356773347782

As @bradheath flags, the D.C. Circuit panel did *exactly* what we predicted on timing: Trump has until next Monday to ask #SCOTUS for a stay, otherwise the trial-court proceedings can resume.

So the Supreme Court will have to decide next week whether it’s going to intervene now:

easelox is on timeout's avatar

If I'm the Supreme Court, I'm so tired of this asshole I just do that thing where they refuse to hear it so the appeals court decision stands (whatever that's called).

Resource NW's avatar

It may be the extra time the three judge panel took was to write an opinion the SCrOTUS could take and put on the books forever... or at least until someone less objectionable than PAB comes along to crime their way through the peznutsy.

defpac's avatar

It is quite possibly that they don't take this one.

I bet: they are angry enough they have to decide on the CO ballot thing, they don't have any interest in wasting their time with this crap here.