Tallahassee Principal Axed Over 'Pornographic' Statue Of David Shown In Art Class

'Is it a masterpiece or just some guy with his pants down?' — Kent Brockman

For the last few years, conservatives with a white supremacist bent have been huffing and puffing over "Western culture" and "Western civilization" and "Western this" and "Western that," because they think it sounds less obviously white supremacist than just saying "white."

Part of this huffing and puffing has been over "classical" art and literature that most of them don't know anything about themselves, but which they want taught to children instead of things created by people of color or any women so that they can grow up believing that white men did pretty much everything important.

However, even that does not seem to be going over well with today's hypervigilant Christian parents.

The principal of a charter school in Tallahassee has resigned following a parental uproar over Michelangelo's statue of David, which one parent called "pornographic." The parents were very upset that they were not made aware weeks ahead of time that children were going to be seeing a picture of the sexy, sexy statue.

File: 'David' by Michelangelo Fir JBU005 denoised.jpg - Wikimedia ...    commons.wikimedia.org 

This was, if you will recall, literally the plot of an episode of "The Simpsons." From Season 2. In which Marge tried to get "Itchy and Scratchy" taken off the air after Maggie hit Homer on the head with a mallet. Marge then realized the error of her ways when the same people who backed her up on that also wanted to ban the statue of David from coming to Springfield on tour.

Perhaps they should have just photoshopped some pants on him? 

After having been the principal of Tallahassee Classical for not even a full year, Hope Carrasquilla was told by the school board's chair, Barney Bishop, that she would either have to resign or get fired following the parental uproar over a sixth grade Renaissance art lesson.

Via Tallahassee Democrat:  

Tallahassee Classical, a Hillsdale College curriculum school, is required to teach about Renaissance art in sixth grade. But three parents complained that the lesson’s content, which included learning about Michelangelo’s sculpture, “David,” upset their children. [...]

Out of the three parents, two said they wished they had been notified of the lesson beforehand, and the other parent complained the lesson was pornographic, Carrasquilla said.

A letter notifying parents of the art lesson should have been sent to parents, Carrasquilla said, but a breakdown in communication between the principal, the director of operations and the art teacher led to an administrative oversight, and parents were not informed.

The board passed a new rule last month that would require parental notification two weeks in advance of any curriculum that is taught that is “potentially controversial,” Bishop said.

The parents will also be able to review the curriculum and the photos that go along with it, and a reminder notice will go out one week in advance.

The irony here is that Hillsdale is a conservative Christian school that basically provides an "anti-woke" conservative, Christian, white male-centered school curriculum to Christian schools (for now) and even that was too much for these parents. Clearly, the parents didn't get the memo that they were only supposed to be pretending to be het up about these kinds of things in order to go after LGBTQ people and were not supposed to apply this newfound puritanical bent to statues of Bible characters made by white men.

The parents are also, oddly enough, upset about staff instability in the school, which has had three principals in the three years it has been open, along with high teacher turnover rates.

“It’s not unusual in new charter schools to go through several principals,” Bishop said. It's also not unusual for charter schools to shut down in the middle of the year, leaving kids with no place to go, or to refuse to accept kids with special needs.

Charter schools in Florida, whether they teach kids things anything or not, have been getting windfalls of cash courtesy of taxpayers and PPP loans, often getting money that should have gone to the state's public school system. 

So far the school hasn't done too well in any capacity — while it was initially a "member" of the Hillsdale classical school network, it was dropped due to failing to meet "improvement standards." In other words, it is not a very good school. Though as terrible as charter schools are (and how extra-bad a charter school following a Hillsdale curriculum must be) ... with parents like this, it is hard to fathom that any school would be able to teach anything.

Bishop — who is not just a charter school board chair, but also a lobbyist — said that he hopes for Tallahassee Classic to be on the “cutting edge” of Ron DeSantis's education reform and is already planning to not tell teenage students that gay people exist even before Republicans are able to pass legislation banning it.

“We agree with everything the governor is doing in the educational arena. We support him because he’s right,” Bishop said. “The whole woke indoctrination going on about pronouns and drag queens isn’t appropriate in school.”

If there is one thing kids should not be learning about in grammar school, other than the statue of David, it is pronouns. Perhaps soon they'll even go so far as to ban nouns entirely. And then verbs! And adverbs! Who needs words anyway when they can just teach the children to grunt approvingly at pictures of Barbara Billingsley and Jesus? As long as he's appropriately dressed, of course. We can't just be showing kids pictures of Jesus hanging out on a cross in his underwear like some kind of gigolo.

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