974 Comments
User's avatar
DaveB's avatar

Zach Lahn moved to Iowa to run for, and lose the governor race.

He closed his concession speech with a promise: “To the people of Iowa, we’ll see you in four years.”

RMKH's avatar

Looks like my use of the $90 Agent Orange bribe really paid off! Like many of us, I gave mine to Talarico and Hinojosa. You can thank me now

weejee's avatar

I'm still getting my magic pillz from the VA for the Stage IV cancer that Agent Orange gifted me.

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

So we going to unfuck all the gerrymandered districts across the country and make sure voting rights are unfucked as well? Maybe even make it so that every eligible voter has a reasonable chance to cast a ballot, and that ballot to be counted? Or do we plan on having to lose all of our gains next election cycle?

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

Can we recreate the Voting Rights Act and shove it up Alito's and Roberts asses?

tehbaddr's avatar

Jeffries looks forward to working with ALL the Representatives!

Jen's Big Blue Wave's avatar

well, with the state ledges we took, we got a shot at some of that

But that is all on the state level, not the fed, so not sure we can do it across the country

yet

ManchuCandidate's avatar

I'm sure that's what Dim Consultants like James Dried Apple Face want. Fuck them assholes.

Ambiance Chaser's avatar

I still have an ominous feeling that there are still a bunch of backhoe operators working in DC that do not answer to Congress . . .

Free beach's avatar

Send them to the Supreme Court

tehbaddr's avatar

Get an official go ahead!

Tetman Callis's avatar

Time be out of fucks to give.

Free beach's avatar

He made the cover again. Where’s the noble? Or Pulitzer?

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Haha! Person of the year material right there!

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

I might need a copy of that.

Brian McCurdy's avatar

I hope I didn't wake up my family early this morning when I was cheering about this!

M-X's avatar

Thanks for working yesterday and you deserve all the loud breakfast dancing.

tek's avatar
7mEdited

cnbc:

𝐕𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐈𝐫𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬

No, JD.. the Iran war is just a symptom.

The root cause is the assholes in charge have been shown to be assholes.

Chemical's avatar

I read his comments and I don't think he's wrong. I do think a few Trump voters flipped in this election for the reasons he's describing, but he's missing something huge: that this blowout is in response to his party's gutter racism directed at Latinos over the last two years.

That is why Texas flipped. Texas has a lot of Latino voters in it. Latino voters in a lot of states -- not just Texas -- just shoved every Klan hood up GOP politicians' asses.

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

That tells me that JD opposed it from the start but that trump doesn't give a fuck what he thinks.

ManchuCandidate's avatar

Who pushed for that War?

Some fuckwad shitbrain named JD Vance among others.

Snarfyguy's avatar

"the party of personal responsibility"

Gern Blansten's avatar

"IT WERE THE OBIDENBAMA WUT GOT 'IM!!!!111!1!!"

Cincinnatus's avatar

Defeated by a Poindexter!

Jen's Big Blue Wave's avatar

real it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again energy, that picture

Gern Blansten's avatar

I'm sure he'll handle rejection well, just like he always does, by stealing some poor child's doll and withholding it from them for starters.

aktlib101's avatar

It looks like the 6-genders, vegan Talafreako wiped the floors with Trump and his choice candidate.

Imagine that

Ambiance Chaser's avatar

A ham sandwich could have beaten Paxton, it was a fortuitous perfect storm . . .

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

Much of what happened last night was self-inflicted by trump. In fact, almost all of it. If we weren't voting against one of his terrible candidates, we were voting against him. May I just say, with tears in my eyes, well done, sir.

Sk8erChoi's avatar

That's the hilarious part, Trump actually personally chose Paxton. He wasn't just some spoiled apple hiding in the middle of the bag.

Chemical's avatar

Ditto for Graham in SC.

I think Cornyn would have lost, anyways, but Trump wouldn't have gotten as much loser stink on him over that loss, and the race would have been closer.

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

Imagine all the people

voting for life and peace

Yooooooooou may say I'm a dreamer

but I'm not the only one....

RMKH's avatar

What's everyone so giddy about? Did something happen last night?

Gern Blansten's avatar

FREE ABORTOGENDERBURGERS FOR EVERYONE!!!!

Edith Prickly's avatar

Shawarma law! Vegan taco trucks on every corner!

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

now now now, vegan is a bridge too far..... vegan OPTIONS on every taco truck mebbe.

Cincinnatus's avatar

Drag Queen Story Hours on every corner!

Antifa Commander's avatar

The Taco trucks are on the way!

aktlib101's avatar

Susan Collins is concerned

RMKH's avatar

Did I see that Madame Theater Handjob got sent packing?

Cincinnatus's avatar

Still holding on, but with a soft grip.

Gern Blansten's avatar

But in imminent danger of getting rubbed out

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

Trump got one day closer to meeting his maker.

gallbladder's avatar

I gave birth to myself.

Anna-Elizabeth's avatar

And let me tell you, that orifice is gaping.

Gern Blansten's avatar

Which one?

ALL OF THEM, KATIE????

NOOOOOO!!!

gallbladder's avatar

The very last utterance of Generalfeldmarschall Erwin Rommel!

Anna-Elizabeth's avatar

~insert gif of Scarlett Johansson laughing and blushing~

Free beach's avatar

Martha Stewart apologized for her Halloween costume.

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

Oligarchs are scratching their heads right now. They've just learned that blanketing the airways with evil ads doesn't work. In fact, it may have backfired because we heard from voters that they were sick of it. Ramasmarmy found out in the hardest way possible. So, what to do? How do we use our money to influence voters? Buying the politician outright won't work because voters will take notice. Perhaps, discarding any pretense of fair & balanced reporting on their networks will do the job. Make it impossible for people to even get a different opinion. Make them think that working 3 jobs with no healthcare and living in a slum is the American Dream?

I don't know. But you know they'll be workshopping this shit.

Tiffany in Houston's avatar

I'm so bummed out that we won't be getting that $5,000 that Trump promised us.

Free beach's avatar

It’s with your tariff bonus.

Snarfyguy's avatar

18 U.S. Code § 597

"Whoever makes or offers to make an expenditure to any person, either to vote or withhold his vote, or to vote for or against any candidate . . . Shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than one year, or both; and if the violation was willful, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than two years, or both."

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

I would laugh and laugh and laugh if we had a DOJ that would go after Trump for the 350,000,000+ violations of this. Let him serve a full year per violation, consecutively. And make him pay the full fine for each violation.

Free beach's avatar

Just add it to my crimes portfolio

-DJT

TerseNurse's avatar

ah, I was just going to spend it on porn and booze and ral partha d&d miniatures anyway.

paperlesstiger's avatar

He could stop with the trade war tariffs and accomplish the same thing.

YaJagoff's avatar

Welp, there goes the pony I wanted.

Free beach's avatar

I hated those kids with ponies.

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

Let the ketchup fly.

======

Trump Media stock is down 46% today. A share costs about as much as a Happy Meal. At its peak, investors paid $175 a share.

https://bsky.app/profile/drewharwell.com/post/3mzinr4a5s22k

Kid 'n Nipple-Play's avatar

Still has room to fall if it is going to be valued at what it is actually worth. Wait, can stocks actually have negative share prices?

Ambiance Chaser's avatar

It always was and always will be a straight gratuity to Trump.

Liberty Financials' TOS states "purchased coins cannot be transferred or withdrawn" . . .

Sk8erChoi's avatar

You always want to work with a bank that doesn't let you take your own money, and also they continue to technically own the coin like a casino chip.

Sk8erChoi's avatar

And now it's the Happy Meal going up to $175

Susan Niemann's avatar

Great story about Ann Richards and Mr. Miles. 😂😂 She was a fantastic woman. 💙

Thesaurus Wrecks 2547's avatar

I wish Dem leadership would pull a McConnell and say they’re going to make Trump a half-term President.

PrimerGray's avatar

Oh yes. Any Supreme Court openings that suddenly are available are not to be considered until after 2028.

Free beach's avatar

Too bad he’s dead.

Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

I’m reminded of the Texas political saying: “Ain’t nothin’ in the middle of the road except yellow lines and dead armadillos.”

josephebacon's avatar

...or white lines that Killer Kennedy and Trump Jr love to snort...