Gobsmacking Crooks! Tabs, Thurs., Sept. 4, 2025

Morning news roundup and things to read!

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

The trial of Brazil’s former president Jair Bolsonaro — for emulating hero Trump with his very own January 6 — has begun. It is hard not to feel despondent at the pretty future we could have voted in, if we weren’t fucking idiots. (Gift link New York Times)

Meanwhile, we’re going to give our January 6ers restitution, for the horrible crime of having persecuted them for trying to murder Congress and overthrow the government. (Gift link NYT)

Donald Trump’s long, humiliating weekend, heart-eyes emoji! (Amanda Marcotte at Salon) And his whirling dervish distractions to distract from his previous distractions. (David Lurie at Public Notice) And the Epstein Files and the sending Texas troops (under Texas’s command!) to invade a sovereign state, and WHAT! (Jeff Tiedrich)

Congratulations, Measles, and Polio! You win. (Ars Technica)

RFK Jr. is focusing on “diet and exercise” (and sure, most of us could eat better and sit less) so he, the secretary of the Department of Fucking Health and Human Services, can take away “medicine.” Like at all. THE MAN DOESN’T EVEN BELIEVE IN GERMS. (Another Marcotte at Salon)

Kristi Noem is deliberately slandering Kilmar Abrego Garcia, and will presumably sue CBS for declining to air her doing so. I’ve never seen a game of Calvinball like the Trumpist Right (and his wife) treat libel laws. (Emptywheel)

Ahahahahahaha, Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick’s old firm (now run by his twentysomething sons, so it’s fiiiine) has been buying up “tariff refund” options from all the big importers. Say you paid $10 million in tariffs; they’d buy the right to any potential refund for say $2 million, and once the courts (as they have!) declare the tariffs illegal, they are sitting on millions or billions of dollars, WHEEEEEEE! These fucking crooks, man. These gobsmacking crooks! (Talking Points Memo)

Yes, the harm would have been to DOGE had the Supreme Court not allowed it to copy every American’s permanent file and put it all in the cloud with no security, that’s where the harm would have been. Don’t miss this Madiba Dennie post, it’s … Christ. (Balls and Strikes)

But some evidence that good lower court rulings are standing … sometimes! And there’ve been several more good ones lately! (Status Kuo)

Ewwwww now Putin and Xi want to join Peter Thiel and all those other Silicon Valley vampires in “immortality,” ughhhhhh. (Paul Waldman)

The AI slop is drowning out the people who actually research their history videos, because it’s coming for everything we enjoy. (404 Media)

Yes, correct, the fecklessness of Democratic leadership — won’t even endorse their own nominee for mayor of New York City — is why Democrats’ popularity is in the shitter, and my wallet remains closed … to some. It’s not because Dems aren’t bipartisan enough, HAKEEM AND CHUCK. (Mehdi Hasan at The Guardian)

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Someone who GETS IT? Come to My Mallory McMorrow fundraiser, at my Detroit home, Sun., Sept. 21, even if you’re not in Michigan; here’s where you can buy tickets! Hooray!

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