Almighty God is apparently supporting the presidential ambitions of three GOP candidates, which is going to be awkward because God's Law, the U.S. Constitution, only allows foronepresident (and one vice president, who exists only so God can choose to take the real president to Heaven, for sexytime). Anyway, according to a
You know who else said God wanted him to run for President? <a href="http:\/\/www.guardian.co.uk\/world\/2003\/nov\/02\/usa.religion" target="_blank">Dubya Bush. </a> Apparently God also told him to invade Iraq. And to eat more <a href="http:\/\/politicalhumor.about.com\/library\/blpretzeljokes.htm" target="_blank">pretzels</a>. God gives crappy advice.
God tells me all sorts of crazy shit. (I assume it&#039;s God. What else could that voice in my head be?) Anyway, mostly God wants me to watch more porn and play more XBOX. Drinking is high on his commandments to me. On several occasions he hath spake that I should do more begat&#039;ing. Once he said to help the poor, but I called his bluff by NOT helping the poor and nothing bad happened (to me).
I&#039;m an atheist but I can imagine God face-palming and muttering &quot;What IS IT with these idiots?? &quot; Kind of like your kid eating the last popsicle because she was pretty sure you meant for her to do it.
รขยยซ She can&#039;t seem to face up to the facts She&#039;s tense and nervous and she can&#039;t relax...
Run run run run run away!
You know who else said God wanted him to run for President? <a href="http:\/\/www.guardian.co.uk\/world\/2003\/nov\/02\/usa.religion" target="_blank">Dubya Bush. </a> Apparently God also told him to invade Iraq. And to eat more <a href="http:\/\/politicalhumor.about.com\/library\/blpretzeljokes.htm" target="_blank">pretzels</a>. God gives crappy advice.
God tells me all sorts of crazy shit. (I assume it&#039;s God. What else could that voice in my head be?) Anyway, mostly God wants me to watch more porn and play more XBOX. Drinking is high on his commandments to me. On several occasions he hath spake that I should do more begat&#039;ing. Once he said to help the poor, but I called his bluff by NOT helping the poor and nothing bad happened (to me).
<i>God is so old and dumb, he doesn&rsquo;t even know about the Blu-Ray...</i>
On the contrary, God&#039;s seen what Mike Huckabee would look like in hi-def. Do not question the wisdom of the Lord.
God cured Herman Cain of his cancer so he can be President. Q E fucking D.
My karma ran over my dogma!
I&#039;m an atheist but I can imagine God face-palming and muttering &quot;What IS IT with these idiots?? &quot; Kind of like your kid eating the last popsicle because she was pretty sure you meant for her to do it.
I ignore the voices in my head which means I&#039;m not crazy... right?