353 Comments
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Satanic Pancake's avatar

If he runs as an independent, part of his campaign could be showcasing how much corruption he uncovered in the GOP. His base would eat it up.

Satanic Pancake's avatar

Stiff a hooker? That horse sailed years ago.

mailman27's avatar

Hint: Ladies, we never grow up.

Mahousu's avatar

I got your smocking gun right here! Oddly, it's from South Africa rather than Russia:https://www.ebay.com/itm/Re...

L. Ron Pony  ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ's avatar

As a rule it works even LESS well when you're an adult.

L. Ron Pony  ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ's avatar

Hardly worth going to all the trouble of typing up a charge sheet.

L. Ron Pony  ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ's avatar

So what you're saying is, this iS something you should be aiming for?

sarah_kay_gee โšœ๏ธ๐Ÿฐโญ's avatar

Yeah, would someone please remind Congressman Hot Take that the incoming majority don't take their marching orders from the opposite party leader, especially when they're a borscht-slurping partisan hack who proudly bragged about abusing his power in order to hurt an icky girl candidate.

L. Ron Pony  ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ's avatar

Yup - United Fruit Company was the big player at the time, Dole's (Standard Fruit) main competitor. UFC is now Chiquita. So it goes.

The Villainess+'s avatar

It's only funny because his base would be spooning bullshit directly into their mouths.

LeighBowery'sLuxuryComedy's avatar

I cannot second this motion loudly or quickly enough.

Cliff Hendroval's avatar

And UFC was often a front for CIA operations in Central America.

Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

Silly wabbit. Don't you know that only Democratic politicians commit crimes? Republicans just have trouble complying with all the pesky regulations the Deep State keeps cramming down our throats.

Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

It's probably telling that these crimes are a bigger deal because the perpetrators don't possess penises.