13 Comments

If the lawsuit doesn't work out Juror Doe can always go the Snowden route with his/her revelations. I hear that the international arrivals lounge at Sheremetevo is lovely this time of year.

Expand full comment

"I'm making out the report now. We haven't quite decided whether he committed suicide or died trying to escape." Capt Louis Renault

Expand full comment

<i>We can’t imagine why anything about their experience might have led them to be skeptical about the fairness and effectiveness of the grand jury system.</i>

Because SHUT UP!! That's why.

Expand full comment

What wine does one serve with a Big Bag o' Dicks? A nice chianti?

Expand full comment

<i>In addition, the juror acknowledges that they “would also like to use Plaintiff’s own experiences to advocate for legislative change to the way grand juries are conducted in Missouri.”</i>

Whomever this person is, she/he has serious ballz. Profiles in courage, indeed. I'm probably being way too optimistic given the Missouri location, but I do hope at least something good like legal reform can emerge from this otherwise awful legal shitstorm.

Expand full comment

You can't go wrong following traditional rules, white with fish, red with meat and ripple with penis.

Expand full comment

More likely, it's his desire to remain a good buddy of the cops, who are, after all, on the "same side".

Expand full comment

Commenting with your pants on is like committing a crime while wearing a hoodie -- it's not permitted!

Expand full comment

"The 12 people who could say for sure are currently sworn to secrecy."

McCulloch's all-out, balls-to-the-wall fight to keep it that way should be fun to watch. Also, I'm pretty sure they're free to tell a federal judge all about it, something which I hope keeps him awake at night.

Expand full comment

... a solid gold Kama Sutra coffee pot...

Expand full comment

As long as he dont stand on a dog while eating the bag of dicks everyone will be just fine but then again they may not

Expand full comment

All the people who yelled "free speech!" when the Duck Dynasty guy was in trouble are surely out there militating for free speech for this grand juror. I can almost see them.

Expand full comment