When camping at Mammoth Cave National Park in KY (The Jelly State) we once watched a Raccoon raid on a neighboring campsite while that family was out on an evening stroll. It was quick, organized, and well executed. Watching them use their hands to open ice chests, retrieve hot dogs, open the packages and devour them was a lesson in dexterity.
For the record, the sound of raccoons engaging in a romantic interlude instigates from them a cacaphony of noise that sounds a little like maybe cats in a running dryer.
I married a hog farmer's daughter. One hot summer night we were in the living room with the winders open and a loud grunting noise came to our ears. You should have seen the looks on the parents' American Gothic faces.
I heard a wretched noise coming from the yard next door, which is always bathed in darkness, and opened the window. "Oh, it's a raccoon. But why is it making that horri-...Oh! It's TWO raccoons!"
Trump had to paper over the golden calf with his picture to make sure everybody knows it belongs to him. Let me know when he starts sacrificing Evangelicals to it, would ya?
... another thing people seem to be expressing is like, a hostile takeover of a government has never happened before. Whereas it's if not usual at least normal, whether by palace coup or surrendur to armed invasion or just the old king dies, here's your new king. America is NOT an exceptional wunderkind, just good progress if we can keep it.
"Roger Stone is promoting Prospera, a “Freedom City” (per Stone) in Honduras backed by Peter Thiel, Marc Andreessen (who once tweeted that “anti-colonialism has been economically catastrophic for the Indian people…”) & Balaji Srinivasan (author of The Network State: How to Build a New Country). 1/". 🧵
Man, that Crowded House video looked like it must’ve been fun to make. “Let’s just go to the beach, and bring a whole lot of people, and drive a bunch of cool old cars!”
Members of boards that provide oversight at the U.S. service academies are no longer in their posts, after President Donald Trump fired them for what he said was their promotion of “woke leftist” ideology.
So eggs are going through the roof, anything made of steel or aluminum is about to get more expensive, and Cheeto has made bribery great again, but at least we’re getting plastic straws.
Musk and a group of other investors have offered $97 billion to buy OpenAI (more precisely it's nonprofit arm), in which Musk was a co-founder. Sam Altman, the CEO, said no thanks, mentioning just how far into the shitter Musk took X after buying it.
I need every single journalist who has even the narrowest chance of directly asking Trump administration lackeys a question to perfect this new form:
“It has been reported that Musk is doing X thing. How will this help President Trump make eggs more affordable?”
“X” needs to be things that have no clear rationale… like blocking USAID funds that were going to US farmers. Cutting head start funding for poor kids. Taking down all the posters of women and minorities in government offices. Blocking the IRS’ own free file software. Blocking the CDC and NIH from active tracking and work on bird flu…
Every single day needs to be a parade of pointing out none of what they are doing is to help US, and most of it is deliberately meant to harm and destroy our lives.
Your hed gif source info: https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/rocky-and-rita-sittin-in-a-tree
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/818b521b-9706-4519-b005-5a0528ebae38?utm_source=share
Thanks for the fuzzies, Martini. ❤️
I'm pulling for raccoons to replace us when we're gone.
When camping at Mammoth Cave National Park in KY (The Jelly State) we once watched a Raccoon raid on a neighboring campsite while that family was out on an evening stroll. It was quick, organized, and well executed. Watching them use their hands to open ice chests, retrieve hot dogs, open the packages and devour them was a lesson in dexterity.
'If that damned bear can do it, so can we! Who's with me?'
"He's on a roll."
Jellystone is the camping area right? Cuz, we're not the "Jelly State".
Anyhoo, did you go into Mammoth Cave? It's very cool.
We were there at Christmas. As we turned a corner into one of the huge caverns, we beheld a lighted Christmas tree. Joy to nature!
Yes. The KY crack was a joke.
https://www.riteaid.com/shop/media/catalog/product/3/8/381370089025.jpg?quality=80&bg-color=255,255,255&height=1500&width=1500&canvas=1500:1500
Did you tell the family what happened when they got back? Were they pissed? Confused? I have do many follow up questions!
The raccoons were still rummaging around when they got back and chased them off. Pissed off doesn't half cover their reaction.
Hope to see some this morn😃
Madison, AL has a minor league baseball team called the Rocket City Trash Pandas.
I have two of their team t-shirts.
For the record, the sound of raccoons engaging in a romantic interlude instigates from them a cacaphony of noise that sounds a little like maybe cats in a running dryer.
It doesn't sound romantic at all.
The sound of cats doing it is the sound of mass murders
Well you'd be screaming too if you were a female and the male's penis was BARBED!!!!!
Some of the lady cats do it whilst sticking their butts up in the air to the males they like as a presentation display…yeeeowl
I married a hog farmer's daughter. One hot summer night we were in the living room with the winders open and a loud grunting noise came to our ears. You should have seen the looks on the parents' American Gothic faces.
I heard a wretched noise coming from the yard next door, which is always bathed in darkness, and opened the window. "Oh, it's a raccoon. But why is it making that horri-...Oh! It's TWO raccoons!"
You should hear Koalas fucking!
Gotta be more pleasant than Nickleback or Ted Nugent.
TBH, I imagine the sounds of most copulations from across the mammal range is not super-melodic.
But not mammal, marsupials, their mating and courting noises are horrific.
Just listen!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2TTVt5RDbU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocIR6B-YtYE
Eeee, maybe after more coffee.
For you or for them?
Puppehs!
Can I pet your Puppeh?
https://substack.com/@tehbaddr/note/c-63627315
Oh, I liked the short fillum also too, it gave me a needed giggle.
He’s just pretending to be romantic; wait a few months and it’ll be nothing but farting and burping after dumpster.
How do you know it wasn't SHE on top? Oh, wait, not anatomically possible. Never mind.
You mean that's not a part of the courting ritual?
YOU DON"T KNOW ME!
And this is wrong?
As it happens, I am looking at a masked marauder right now! He's drinking water from the heated bird bath...
Big as a beach ball, he is...
Well let him in already for some crumpets!
They come gunning for cat food, they console themselves with not-frozen water...
Cute little masked critters.
Aww...love!
I was just about to ask "WHAT are they doing besides fondling ears?"
Soaking.
I don't get it, but I haven't had coffee yet?
Soaking is one of the loopholes for the Mormons, allegedly. It's penetrative sex with no motion. Supposedly, virginity is maintained that way.
EEEEyuuuuu. (sp?)
No offense, but sorry I asked.
(evil eyebrow wiggle)
Trump had to paper over the golden calf with his picture to make sure everybody knows it belongs to him. Let me know when he starts sacrificing Evangelicals to it, would ya?
Trump pardoned Blagojevich because Felon34 believes all corruption are legitimate business practices.
When it comes to "who's abusing kids" I'll stick with Joe.My.God.
Got the fuzz ripped off of my lower face with hot wax today, and yummm, that felt great! *not*
and still feels great! *not* but well, yeah.
Have some pop-punk.
Sum 41. 'Dopamine'
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYk2BTwuQnM
Yea Sherrilyn.
... another thing people seem to be expressing is like, a hostile takeover of a government has never happened before. Whereas it's if not usual at least normal, whether by palace coup or surrendur to armed invasion or just the old king dies, here's your new king. America is NOT an exceptional wunderkind, just good progress if we can keep it.
"Roger Stone is promoting Prospera, a “Freedom City” (per Stone) in Honduras backed by Peter Thiel, Marc Andreessen (who once tweeted that “anti-colonialism has been economically catastrophic for the Indian people…”) & Balaji Srinivasan (author of The Network State: How to Build a New Country). 1/". 🧵
https://bsky.app/profile/jennycohn.bsky.social/post/3lhw3qfgtfc2b
I've had friends do (bleeding heart librul) assistance work in Honduras. It is dangerous as fuck. What could go wrong?
Hopefully everything.
Sounds a bit like Jonestown to me!
Late to the party on today's Tabs, but this is probably where this should go.
That time Mike Meyers gave me his hat and had Wayne Campbell record my outgoing answering machine message. Now! With added Brooke Shields!
https://chrisxcarroll.substack.com
How Kanye West Got a Super Bowl Ad Then Used It to Sell Swastika Shirt
https://variety.com/2025/tv/news/how-kanye-west-super-bowl-ad-swastika-shirts-1236302946/
Trump’s Plan for Mass Detention at Guantánamo Has Happened Before. It Was a Disaster. | Teen Vogue
https://www.teenvogue.com/story/trump-mass-detention-guantanamo-haiti
Man, that Crowded House video looked like it must’ve been fun to make. “Let’s just go to the beach, and bring a whole lot of people, and drive a bunch of cool old cars!”
Love my Tab's and Coffee in the morning ☕💯👍
Members of boards that provide oversight at the U.S. service academies are no longer in their posts, after President Donald Trump fired them for what he said was their promotion of “woke leftist” ideology.
https://www.stripes.com/theaters/us/2025-02-11/trump-fires-service-academy-boards-16795113.html
So eggs are going through the roof, anything made of steel or aluminum is about to get more expensive, and Cheeto has made bribery great again, but at least we’re getting plastic straws.
I see that Thom Thillis took a courageous stand on Tulsi’s nomination by not voting.
profiles in timidity?
So did Fetterman.
So baffled by that guy.
Musk and a group of other investors have offered $97 billion to buy OpenAI (more precisely it's nonprofit arm), in which Musk was a co-founder. Sam Altman, the CEO, said no thanks, mentioning just how far into the shitter Musk took X after buying it.
I need every single journalist who has even the narrowest chance of directly asking Trump administration lackeys a question to perfect this new form:
“It has been reported that Musk is doing X thing. How will this help President Trump make eggs more affordable?”
“X” needs to be things that have no clear rationale… like blocking USAID funds that were going to US farmers. Cutting head start funding for poor kids. Taking down all the posters of women and minorities in government offices. Blocking the IRS’ own free file software. Blocking the CDC and NIH from active tracking and work on bird flu…
Every single day needs to be a parade of pointing out none of what they are doing is to help US, and most of it is deliberately meant to harm and destroy our lives.
🏆