440 Comments
User's avatar
Pamela Gregory's avatar

Good call ending with Squirrel Nut Zippers!

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Blair Lehman's avatar

Leaving Chicago in early November and not returning until March…tough guys can’t handle winter, huh?

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Maybe's avatar

We need an Internet definition for the word "bovino". Dan Savage did it for Santorum and it worked out great. His definition still comes up near-top in a Google search.

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A.J.'s avatar

I hate that this is true, but that picture in front of the bean is quite excellent

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fuflans's avatar

well for the chicago nuremburg trial records, yeah it will be great.

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Goonemeritus's avatar

I'm told Chicago is now just as peaceful and lovely as in the "Sound of Music".

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Maybe's avatar

Weren't there also Nazis in that story?

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Goonemeritus's avatar

In both stories there are Nazis

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LOU LOU's avatar

Why do ICE agents get to wear masks? Why are body cams not being used? I know the answer but why is this even legal?

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Kirsty Gnome-Poledance Himmler's avatar

They shouldn't be called "ICE" for their weather tolerance.

I've seen tougher daffodils.

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Maybe's avatar

And, like ICE, daffodils are poisonous. But much prettier.

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Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

Not so long ago, I made a gratuitous fielding error while playing softball. There was a hard hit but high pop fly; I had to sprint in at full speed to attempt a catch. I got there. The ball got there. My glove was in the wrong place, and I “caught” it square in the nuts.

I’ll let all the men get over their cringe, and for the women to stop laughing.

OK, now that we’re past that, it hurt like hell. Way worse than an ordinary kick to the nads. Way, way worse. I mean, I was running maybe 16 mph and the ball was descending me a lot faster than that. It wasn’t something I could shake off; I had to leave the game, and spent the next 24 hours in real pain.

But, like the peasant who had been turned into a newt, I got better. I did not need medical attention, much less an MRI. And I guarantee that me running full tilt into that ball made for a way harder impact than any rock that was merely thrown. So Bovino is either a liar (no doubt!) or the opposite of a tough guy when he claims to have needed two weeks of bed rest to recover from this event. He doesn’t actually know what it is he’s making up. I do.

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Maybe's avatar

What peasant got turned into a newt? I haven't heard that one before.

As you are probably aware, being turned into a newt is likely far less painful than what you went through.

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Maybe's avatar

Thanks very much for the source. I love it.

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Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

The whole movie (Monty Python’s Holy Grail) is hilarious.

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ManchuCandidate's avatar

When I spray tear gas into your eyes

I can see the spite restrained

But, people', when I detain you

Don't you know I feel the same? Yeah

'Cause nothing lasts forever

And we both know the Pedo's mind can change

And it's hard to hold a pistol

In the cold November rain

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Bitter Scribe's avatar

Now ICE is hunkering down inside that Broadview microgulag and leaving it to local, county and state police to protect them from protestors. All of the latter paid with my tax money, of course. Fuckheads.

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Joshua's avatar

Squirrel Nut Zippers! Thanks Marcie Jones!

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Glennis Waterman's avatar

Trump regime says crime in Chicago has “dropped dramatically” since their illegal operation. What do they base this on? The same statistics that showed crime was already down before they came in, which they denied?

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Maybe's avatar

Well, if much of ICE left then that would certainly reduce crime in Chicago. I bet there is no one left in Chicago who has been convicted of 34 felonies.

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Glennis Waterman's avatar

Why do I keep mixing up Bovino and Bongino? Is it because they’re both assholes?

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a. diderot's avatar

Every time I see the top photo, it reminds me of a Spencer Tunick group photo, then I realize the pubic hair is in the wrong place and there are no dicks...huh. That was a little fun, but everything else in this post is awful except:

The idiot ICE agent pointing his gun out the car window has a face gaiter that is thin like a pair of Lululemon yoga pants, we can see everything going on underneath -- silly twatwaffle

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Free beach's avatar

They are all dicks.

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Khavrinen's avatar

"agents have continued to go around using them, including spraying a one-year-old in the face with pepper spray"

Obviously that poor, traumatized ICE agent was in fear for his life! Do you have any idea how dangerous one-year-olds are in the wild??!!!

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Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

Or in captivity for that matter. He’s lucky to have survived!

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Stuart's avatar

So... DHS and ICE are moving out of Chicago now that it's November and are heading for sunnier climes in North Carolina. But... they promise to be back to Chicago in March.

Fair-weather fiends.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Chicago in March. When lovers frolic in the park, basking in the warmth and sunshine.

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