Greg Gutfeld Thinks Teachers Having Sex With High School Boys Is Great, But Tell Us More About Groomers

The real groomers are at the Bud Light drag show at Target, probably.

Back in October, Fox News's Greg Gutfeld, who is almost 60 and looks it, made a wee stir when he said some truly weird things about how the college students just aren't hot enough for him anymore. It's always upsetting to find out you've run afoul of the surely high standards of Greg Gutfeld.

Here's that clip:

“58-year-old Greg Gutfeld complains that today's college kids aren't hot enough. "They are deliberately ugly-fying themselves... They're out of shape, asexual, they're rejecting the truth in beauty, they all look like rejects from a loony bin. I'd steer clear of college, too!"”

— Justin Baragona (@Justin Baragona) 1665093692 

As the Daily Beast reports, after Gutfeld said those things, he tweeted to promote his late night show, saying it was “another insane hour of quality programming hosted by the most handsome host on the planet (studies show).” This is real sad, because (studies show that) Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, and Jimmy Kimmel are all objectively far more fuckable than the dumpy old 58-year-old garbage boy Greg Gutfeld.

But please tell us more about how the ratings say you're the king of late night, dude. We'll all pretend your viewership isn't mostly people whose oxygen runs out during Laura Ingraham and the TV is still on.

Anyway, Gutfeld was a gross creep again this week on his "Gutfeld!" show, but this time it was about younger kids. He's just super hot for a news story about a woman teacher who's in trouble for having sex with a 16-year-old student. We're going to just copy and paste this transcript with minimal interruption, because considering this week's news cycle, we're going to be talking a lot about how right-wing terrorists are escalating their war against LGBTQ+ people for allegedly going after children. Except wait, who are the groomers?

GREG GUTFELD: OK, this 38-year-old math teacher in California, was once named teacher of the year (and I support that), was arrested and booked into jail for allegedly having sex with a 16-year-old male student. She posted bail but this is what bothers me.

KATHERINE TIMPF: The fact that she had sex with a student?

No it's not that.

GUTFELD: No, that she went to jail for it! I'm sorry! Come on! 16 years old — I would have died for that!

TIMPF: Again, I am vehemently against banging kids.

It's a thing you have to say on Fox News, when the white male conservative host is taking the opposite position. We report, you decide, eh, Fox?

GUTFELD: Can we live in the real world?

TIMPF: I can't believe how many times I've had to say that just sitting in this chair.

It's a thing she has to say here on this show.

GUTFELD: Let's live in the real world, Kat.

TIMPF: I've never had to say it any other time.

Not a thing she has to say at Target, for instance, or on a Bud Light factory tour. Just on the set at Fox News, on the "Greg!" show.

GREG: A 16-year-old boy! 16-year-old boy with like a hot teacher. You're, I mean — what was the Van Halen song? Hot for teacher? That was written about this! It wasn't about, hey, let's have a responsible relationship with someone close to my age. Peter, you're a professor. You deal with, you've dealt with topics in a way like this. Am I right to say it's an unfair comparison to do the female-to-male teacher? Like a male teacher, 38-year-old, creepy. Female, heroic.

Well all right. We'd ask if this is something his therapist recommends talking about out loud, but then we remembered that guys like Greg don't really strike us as the type to try to fix their own mental health issues, surely not with a therapist.

So we won't ask that.

Maybe it was supposed to be a comedy bit. Conservatives are getting better at comedy, after all. Making the Left nervous.

Anyway, guess it's time to get about the rest of the news of the day, now that this creeper has set the scene so nicely.

[ Media Matters ]

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