Is The Water Making Boys Cry And Turning Frogs Transgender? Fox News Discusses!

Also turning boys transgender.

If you want a quick indicator of how quickly the Republican needle has moved into outright conspiracy theories in just a few short years, here's one.

People used to laugh and laugh at Alex Jones shaking around and screaming that the water was turning the frogs gay. That is, when he wasn't busy abusing Sandy Hook families instead. What a radical, crazy person idea that is! But that was then, this is now.

Because yesterday on Fox News's "The Five," hosts Greg Gutfeld and Jesse Watters, both of whom are headed for primetime next month, had a bunch of their own thoughts on what the water's doing. This time it's making all the men cry and turning them non-binary and also turning frogs transgender.

GREG GUTFELD (CO-HOST): It's okay to cry, my fellow guys. A survey finds that 71 percent of modern men confess to being in touch with how they feel and 82 percent of women are saying the same thing. I can't even see who this survey is. Thirty-seven percent of men say being called sensitive would be a compliment versus just 23 percent of women. I know.

First, I'm going to go to Jesse: I think we're learning that RFK Jr. was right. There's substances in the water that reduce testosterone and when you reduce testosterone, you get these weepy men and this rise in nonbinary affiliations.

JESSE WATTERS (CO-HOST): Yeah, so I'm not drinking water anymore because you told me it turns you trans.

GUTFELD: Yeah, it turns you trans, especially if you're a frog.

This is the most-watched show in cable news. This used to be relegated to the far fringes. Now it's on the show your Nana watches before she takes her fourth afternoon nap. "It turns you trans, especially if you're a frog."

Now, to be fair, the recent Gutfeld profile in the New York Times, which was published for some reason, alludes to the idea that sometimes he is being serious and other times he is being very funny but it can be hard to tell which. They suggest this is part of his schtick, but we'd like to posit that perhaps he's just not a very funny person. Regardless, maybe this is one of those times he's being a jokester. Or maybe he believes the water is turning frogs transgender.

Who knows? In the clip, Gutfeld laughs and his hosts laugh, but he also says unhinged lunatic Robert Kennedy Jr. is right to believe there are things in the water removing all the testosterone. Because this is what RFK Jr. believes. That there are chemicals in the water making all the men transgender. (See this in context of the snail trails Fox News covered its studios with wanking to those shirtless pictures of RFK Jr. Guess he's not drinking the water!)

Jesse Watters is surely attempting to make a "joke" when he says he's not drinking water anymore because Greg said it might turn him transgender.

Of course, these "jokes" are only "jokes" to people with bizarre Caucasian masculinity issues, i.e. a lot of Fox's audience. And the fact that they're talking about this is mainstreaming it just the same.

After the part we excerpted above, the boy hosts have a talk about all the times they have cried, and then Dana Perino talks about crying and how she loves it when Jesse Watters cries when he laughs, and Greg Gutfeld says if you go out on a date and the guy starts crying because you order veal — is that a thing? — then you should "stab him in the throat," and Judge Boxwine says you should stab them with a fork. Judge Boxwine says she's fine with men crying. Gutfeld says he always cries after he does a murder. (Remember he is a comedian.)

Then Jesse and Greg start making fun of each other about lotion.

People think this is the news.

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