National Opt-Out Day is finally here! Thousands of men, women, children and stray cats are expected to refuse a TSA naked cancer chamber scan, choosing instead to be gate raped by career failures. Chief TSA Pedobear "John Pistole" says that people who love getting cancer shouldn't opt-out, because then you won't get cancer and also there might be flight delays. So now everyone must opt-out, in order to make John Pistole look foolish and dumb. Would you like to be groped, for pleasure, but do not anticipate flying anywhere today? That's okay, the TSA is giving out free grope coupons! Print one out and hustle over to the nearest airport. There is a one hundred percent chance somebody is going to touch your penis or vagina today.
"Hey, are you gonna buy me dinner after your done?" and "Hey, don't I get a kiss first?" are two questions I suggest asking the poor slob who has to cup his hands under your man-boobs. He will be really amazed and impressed by your originality.
Sorry, I'm feeling a little sympathy for the poor TSA drones who have to spend the day reaching under the corn-syrup flab of 98% of the American traveling public today. Unless, of course, said drone has his or her own corn-syrup flab to be proud of.
Someone posted a comment on the NPR blog that he went through security with a banana stuffed in his pants, and unfortunately did not have to go through porn cancer box, nor get felt up. Sad face :(
turkey stories, TSA and palin coverage.
wonkette is the new grand guignol of the interwebs.
Ok, Miss Jones...show us on the doll where the TSA agent touched you.
"Hey, are you gonna buy me dinner after your done?" and "Hey, don't I get a kiss first?" are two questions I suggest asking the poor slob who has to cup his hands under your man-boobs. He will be really amazed and impressed by your originality.
Sorry, I'm feeling a little sympathy for the poor TSA drones who have to spend the day reaching under the corn-syrup flab of 98% of the American traveling public today. Unless, of course, said drone has his or her own corn-syrup flab to be proud of.
Someone posted a comment on the NPR blog that he went through security with a banana stuffed in his pants, and unfortunately did not have to go through porn cancer box, nor get felt up. Sad face :(