The Golden Rule, replicated in various iterations in other religions, shows us that people have always needed to be reminded that courtesy ought to be more common. Manners and etiquette are more demanding and controlling expansions.
One thing is, though, you can read the Rule in reverse and treat assholes as they treat you.
That dog photo reminds me of a visit to someone's house, where I found myself facing three small dogs barking and growling in front of me. After 20 minutes drinking coffee and talking while sitting on the couch I had a dog resting it's head on each leg and the third on top of the couch resting it's head on my shoulder.
I was very particular regarding the demonstration of good manners at our house when my girls were growing up. "Please" and "Thank you" were expected. Failure to do so meant being taken aside and gently corrected. Fortunately that was all that was required to correct rude or otherwise thoughtless, careless behavior that could offend.
I was very proud of my girls and their excellent manners. It was very gratifying when other people noticed and commented on how kind, helpful, or otherwise impressive the girls' behavior was in various social situations. The girls learned early on that how you will be treated depends entirely upon how you treat others.
I am a fervent admirer of Miss Manners. Courtesy lubricates the relations among us selfish oafs. Were it not for "common" courtesy we'd all just revert to being the boys in Lord of the Flies.
I'm more on the Amy Vanderbilt side - etiquette exists to make others comfortable.
My mother told us the story of my great aunt who was married to someone very high up in an international service organization. At a fancy dinner (in Argentina, I think) my great aunt saw a fingerbowl for the first time. So she drank from it. The hostess saw that, so she drank from hers too, rather than embarrass my great aunt.
Today feels like an outside day. It’s only 51f, but the birds are singing, the dew is cooling my bare toes, the coffee is warming my belly, and the cat at my feet is happily tossing her dead mouse in the air and catching it. What a day to be alive!
I took one semester of japanese in college - it was great. THe prof always wore a suit - which should be one Manners Rule. You had to learn A LOT of Japanese manners just to speak the language. Like if you visit a friend and the friend offers you a cookie (not actually a cookie) you have to refuse twice and then on the third offer you can dig in. It's just common courtesy. There were a million of these if you please.
Two refusals before acceptance is ritual, not common courtesy. But considering I feel people should be honest, even about wanting a cookie, I may have a warped sense of courtesy. Which is why I will always ask if something died in the foyer if I enter your home and it smells.
I admit to slight inadequacy there. While I expect guests to remove their footwear, I don’t provide shelves, just floor space. My wife has filled the shelves with all her damned boots. Why, for the love of dogs and cats, does anyone need twelve pairs of dress boots?
Because they have to match the style and color of the clothes you're wearing them with. For guys, that's casual or dressy, brown or black. Women have far more permutations to deal with.
Ta, Robyn. I'm courteous every day. When I get off the bus, I thank the driver (can't do that on the train). Common courtesy has become all too uncommon. Senior citizen Zyxomma has to race the kids for a seat on the bus or train, because horrors! if they have to stand up while scrolling on their ubiquitous phones. I made our delicious fruit bowls this morning; the flowery green tea was made already. Darling husband Meccalopolis served our elitist avocado toast, and the coffee is brewing. Good day, beloved Wonketteers. We love and appreciate you all and we bless us all with love, health, peace, and grace.
Please, please stay safe. Wear a mask or two, wash your hands, sanitize when you cannot wash and let the sanitizer dry completely, stop touching your face, take Vitamin D, get a booster shot six months after your last and catch up on any other needed vaccines (the kids, too, need all their shots), avoid indoor and crowded outdoor gatherings and when you must meet, remove masks only to eat, drink, and take quick photos, and stay the fuck away from us and anyone with whom you do not share a roof. Do this because you love yourself, and because we love you, too. Do this in memory of dear departed friends like 27 Club member Treg and heroic Tony, Holly's pilot friend, among nearly eight million dead worldwide. Do this to honor the nurses and other frontline medical personnel (we love you, medicos of Wonkette), especially ICU Hera Mrs Land Shark RN. Stay safe.
Did you know that slurping noodles from a bowl held close to your mouth while using chopsticks is A-OK over there? IT IS!
Burping at the table is rude in Japan. Blowing the nose in public is rude. Loud talk and farting on bus or train is rude. Stay in America if those are your things.
"Burping at the table is rude in Japan. Blowing the nose in public is rude. Loud talk and farting on bus or train is rude. Stay in America if those are your things."
The Golden Rule, replicated in various iterations in other religions, shows us that people have always needed to be reminded that courtesy ought to be more common. Manners and etiquette are more demanding and controlling expansions.
One thing is, though, you can read the Rule in reverse and treat assholes as they treat you.
Caturday mood:
Not now. We'll get to it later.
https://substack.com/@jtmailman/note/c-231154425?r=l3vaz
I can't stop laughing.
If this is how hard it is to restrain a food robot, we're fucked when it comes to military robots.
Thge aproln. I just can't with the f ucking apron. LMMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
https://apnews.com/video/staff-struggle-to-restrain-dancing-robot-6d957cf7d51442f1bea51eef63c44e67
Where in the hell is the "ON/OFF" switch, FFS?
I fucking can't. I'm STILL laughing my ass off.
That dog photo reminds me of a visit to someone's house, where I found myself facing three small dogs barking and growling in front of me. After 20 minutes drinking coffee and talking while sitting on the couch I had a dog resting it's head on each leg and the third on top of the couch resting it's head on my shoulder.
Right nao, Birb is eating a protein bar for breakfast.
She is watching Fulham vs. Burnley in soccer on the tee vee.
She bids you all "Hello" with a polite trill of chirps.
Chirp in return. Glad you're having fun.
A thanke, nice lady.
Hello, Birb!
Henlo! Chirp chirp chirp. Wishing you the most funnest day! :) :) :)
I was very particular regarding the demonstration of good manners at our house when my girls were growing up. "Please" and "Thank you" were expected. Failure to do so meant being taken aside and gently corrected. Fortunately that was all that was required to correct rude or otherwise thoughtless, careless behavior that could offend.
I was very proud of my girls and their excellent manners. It was very gratifying when other people noticed and commented on how kind, helpful, or otherwise impressive the girls' behavior was in various social situations. The girls learned early on that how you will be treated depends entirely upon how you treat others.
Uue are a good person being. :)
I am a fervent admirer of Miss Manners. Courtesy lubricates the relations among us selfish oafs. Were it not for "common" courtesy we'd all just revert to being the boys in Lord of the Flies.
I'm more on the Amy Vanderbilt side - etiquette exists to make others comfortable.
My mother told us the story of my great aunt who was married to someone very high up in an international service organization. At a fancy dinner (in Argentina, I think) my great aunt saw a fingerbowl for the first time. So she drank from it. The hostess saw that, so she drank from hers too, rather than embarrass my great aunt.
Also, too, I saw a clip featuring bell hooks yesterday where she was talking about similar things. Maybe we could do a "read bell hooks day"?
We should.
Perhaps we need to start smaller, like, such as "don't be an asshole" and work our way up to common courtesy first?
"Don't Be Evil" was one corporation's motto until it was replaced with "Do the Right Thing". Not much of a ripple effect, though.
Google should heed their own motto regardless of version.
Fucking Google once.
Today feels like an outside day. It’s only 51f, but the birds are singing, the dew is cooling my bare toes, the coffee is warming my belly, and the cat at my feet is happily tossing her dead mouse in the air and catching it. What a day to be alive!
What a day to be alive!
“I WOULDN’T KNOW.”
-the mouse
I always thought that Hannibal Lecter was courteous. Ya know, until he started eating you...
The trick is fava beans.
I thought it was the Chianti.
In the book it was a better wine than Chianti.
I avoid people as much as possible. It’s just common courtesy.
I just let my German Shepherds screen my visitors. They have an uncanny knack for identifying jerks.
and prey to GOD they avoid you
I took one semester of japanese in college - it was great. THe prof always wore a suit - which should be one Manners Rule. You had to learn A LOT of Japanese manners just to speak the language. Like if you visit a friend and the friend offers you a cookie (not actually a cookie) you have to refuse twice and then on the third offer you can dig in. It's just common courtesy. There were a million of these if you please.
Two refusals before acceptance is ritual, not common courtesy. But considering I feel people should be honest, even about wanting a cookie, I may have a warped sense of courtesy. Which is why I will always ask if something died in the foyer if I enter your home and it smells.
That is precisely why you remove your footwear on the foyer. There are shelves for just that purpose.
I admit to slight inadequacy there. While I expect guests to remove their footwear, I don’t provide shelves, just floor space. My wife has filled the shelves with all her damned boots. Why, for the love of dogs and cats, does anyone need twelve pairs of dress boots?
Because they have to match the style and color of the clothes you're wearing them with. For guys, that's casual or dressy, brown or black. Women have far more permutations to deal with.
expell this 'wife' until she can behave properly.
Not only the shelves, but also little paper slippers are provided so you do not tear up the tatami mats you whore
In Japan you would be tolerated as a poor barbarian and not expected to be capable of delicacy of taste.
Hey, if it keeps me off the cannibal’s plate.
Ta, Robyn. I'm courteous every day. When I get off the bus, I thank the driver (can't do that on the train). Common courtesy has become all too uncommon. Senior citizen Zyxomma has to race the kids for a seat on the bus or train, because horrors! if they have to stand up while scrolling on their ubiquitous phones. I made our delicious fruit bowls this morning; the flowery green tea was made already. Darling husband Meccalopolis served our elitist avocado toast, and the coffee is brewing. Good day, beloved Wonketteers. We love and appreciate you all and we bless us all with love, health, peace, and grace.
Please, please stay safe. Wear a mask or two, wash your hands, sanitize when you cannot wash and let the sanitizer dry completely, stop touching your face, take Vitamin D, get a booster shot six months after your last and catch up on any other needed vaccines (the kids, too, need all their shots), avoid indoor and crowded outdoor gatherings and when you must meet, remove masks only to eat, drink, and take quick photos, and stay the fuck away from us and anyone with whom you do not share a roof. Do this because you love yourself, and because we love you, too. Do this in memory of dear departed friends like 27 Club member Treg and heroic Tony, Holly's pilot friend, among nearly eight million dead worldwide. Do this to honor the nurses and other frontline medical personnel (we love you, medicos of Wonkette), especially ICU Hera Mrs Land Shark RN. Stay safe.
Slava Ukraini. 🌻🇺🇦💙💛
Morning Zyx! Hope you are feeling better? : )
Ta, Kateorite. Yes, I'm quite well. Nine hours of sleep (almost unheard of on a weekday) rid me of the tummyache and I've felt well since.
I hate stomach stuff more than almost anything. :( I'm glad you're feeling better.
Oh lovely! Bodies do tell us what they need.
Our 'etiquette' can't touch Japanese etiquette.
Did you know that slurping noodles from a bowl held close to your mouth while using chopsticks is A-OK over there? IT IS!
Burping at the table is rude in Japan. Blowing the nose in public is rude. Loud talk and farting on bus or train is rude. Stay in America if those are your things.
"Burping at the table is rude in Japan. Blowing the nose in public is rude. Loud talk and farting on bus or train is rude. Stay in America if those are your things."
I kinda think all those are rude in America, too.
Obviously you ain’t from around these parts!
yrs,
TEXAS
I like to slurp.