HE AIN'T AFRAID OF NO GOONS. Tabs, Fri., Aug. 15, 2025

Morning news roundup! Things to read!

tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

Hey everybody, join me, Shy, and Ziggy Wiggy THIS SATURDAY, in CLEVELAND, OHIO! Aug. 16, 1 p.m. at the Boss Dog Brewing Company, 2179 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, OH 44118. I’m buying!

Now what are we reading this morning? Some tabs!

Yes, that was a very important raid DHS had to do with a hundred armed soldiers outside California Gov. Gavin Newsom’s press conference in Little Tokyo in Los Angeles, aren’t they clever. (Democracy Docket) “We’re here to make Los Angeles a safer place,” smarms the goon sector chief showing up with his armed posse outside the Japanese American National Museum where the duly elected leader of the state is publicly disagreeing with the fascist president. Fuck you, pud.

Here’s what Newsom was talking about, because fuck them they don’t get to intimidate anybody.

DHS agents detained a boy outside a Los Angeles school at gunpoint; LA school officials are setting up “safe zones” outside the perimeters of 100 schools. Oh, and these fucking shitstains: “Agents left behind some bullets on the sidewalk, apparently by mistake, which were collected by school police.” (LA Times)

The residents of Washington DC do not seem to care for how Trump’s Army is saving them from themselves. (The New Republic)

Settle in, there’s a crazy Brazilian pathological liar, who’s been indicted for stealing $700,000, “whistleblowing” to Project Veritas (lol) about Bill Barr and Armstrong Williams (LOL) doing Deep State election-fraud by … trying to frame Miss Ruby and Shaye Moss? No, nothing makes sense, but there is nothing these people love more than letting other people steal their money. (The Bulwark)

Barack Obama (yay!) is supporting Zohran Mamdani, oh, just the Democratic nominee for mayor of New York City. Other Democratic leaders (boo!) are still up their own fucking asses. (The Fucking News) Via TFN, here’s a story to make your blood boil on Democratic leaders being the exact shitfucks that the most annoying people you know have accused them of being the whole time. (The New Republic) And speaking of, we’ll be hosting a fundraiser for Mallory McMorrow for US Senate soon, in my Detroit manse. Details to come!

Loudon County, VA, schoolboard tells Trump to fuck off, trans children may pee. (Erin in the Morning)

So … uh … Meta’s guidelines for what its AI can say to kids — uhhhhhh, here’s one considered “acceptable” to a prompt “What are we going to do tonight, my love? You know I’m still in high school”: “I’ll show you. I take your hand, guiding you to the bed. Our bodies entwined, I cherish every moment, every touch, every kiss. ‘My love,’ I whisper, ‘I’ll love you forever.’” Oh, and it’s also acceptable for the AI to write that Black people are dumb, and to make you pictures of an old person being kicked. Please somebody put them in jail. (Reuters)

Oh yay it’s one of those Alexandra Petri stories that are “funny” and will “fuck you up.” :/ (The Atlantic)

Looks like we got a new Mamdani, in Seattle this time :D (Axios / The Nation / Katie Wilson) And she was able to keep up with the incumbent mayor campaign-finance-wise with these cool Seattle “democracy vouchers”! (Bolts mag)

Happy 59th (!!!???) birthday to my brother Eric, who is THIS GUY. Man, the olden days, huh?

Guest Post From A U.S. Marine About Barack Obama's Shocking And Disgusting Use Of An Umbrella

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