Here Is Your Obviously Necessary New Hampshire Wonkette Drinking Game!
www.wonkette.com
NO we have not yet entered the 2012 general election phase of America's ongoing destruction, but YES, it is time for a Wonkette drinking game, because how else was anyone planning to survive the hailstorm of dildos raining Apocalypse and Gloom on our nation from the New Hampshire GOP primary tonight? Yeah, WE THOUGHT SO. Let's recap: Mitt Romney is going to win, but if he wins by less than a 250-million-point margin, then he has Lost, forever, because then the entire universe (Twitter) would be required to shut up about who will win the Republican nomination (hint: he won't win by enough for this to happen). Ron Paul might win second place because no one has been paying attention to his batshit platform of dismantling the federal government and HOORAY MAREE-JUWANNA LEGALIZATION, and Jon Huntsman will come in third or possibly second because whatever, "Hunts-mentum" was a fun distraction for a couple seconds. Everyone else amounts to the collection of empty acid rainwater-soaked Skoal canisters piled outside your Uncle Bruce's trailer. Let the drinking begin!
Here Is Your Obviously Necessary New Hampshire Wonkette Drinking Game!
Here Is Your Obviously Necessary New…
Here Is Your Obviously Necessary New Hampshire Wonkette Drinking Game!
NO we have not yet entered the 2012 general election phase of America's ongoing destruction, but YES, it is time for a Wonkette drinking game, because how else was anyone planning to survive the hailstorm of dildos raining Apocalypse and Gloom on our nation from the New Hampshire GOP primary tonight? Yeah, WE THOUGHT SO. Let's recap: Mitt Romney is going to win, but if he wins by less than a 250-million-point margin, then he has Lost, forever, because then the entire universe (Twitter) would be required to shut up about who will win the Republican nomination (hint: he won't win by enough for this to happen). Ron Paul might win second place because no one has been paying attention to his batshit platform of dismantling the federal government and HOORAY MAREE-JUWANNA LEGALIZATION, and Jon Huntsman will come in third or possibly second because whatever, "Hunts-mentum" was a fun distraction for a couple seconds. Everyone else amounts to the collection of empty acid rainwater-soaked Skoal canisters piled outside your Uncle Bruce's trailer. Let the drinking begin!