Wonderama had a grand prize, won by being first to find the key to a lock among many keys; for the two top winners. A close friend of the family had a secret conversation with the kid against whom he was competing. When he opened the box, he told Sonny Fox, the host, that his competitor had worked just as hard as he, and thought they should split the prizes. Sonny awarded both kids the entire grand prize. I believe that was the only time that ever happened.
My oldest daughter, when a very small child was given a stuffed aardvark to hold as a cuddle buddy. She kept it for some years and it, though much loved, over the years, got quite soiled. My wife decided it had gotten just too nasty and put it into the washer and ran it on a delicate cycle. The damn thing absolutely disintegrated. That's when the trouble started.
My daughter was creative too. She had an alligator she named, "Allie." I'm kind of jealous. I don't have a stuffed aardvark. I'll have to look for one.
Ever watch the Ant and the Ardvaark cartoons? Jewish humor forever! The ant had a broken leg, and the Aardvark was going to suck him up. “With the cast on?” asked the ant. “It’ll add roughage!” replied the Aardvark. My dad split a gut laughing!
Great choice to start the week Martini! Aardvarks will be kosher forever, thanks to Frizz Freeling!
I am astounded at what MAGA will accept from someone with an R after their name. We on the left have made jokes about their propensity with having sex with farm animals for decades, and they go through the roof every. single. time.
Someone with an R after their name basically makes the same joke, a brown man with a foreign-sounding name no less, and they're like, "Hurr! He gets me."
Google has the power, money, and influence to tell Donald Trump to fuck off with his ridiculous naming bullshit. But instead of "doing no evil," they're enabling a junior fascist and have an endless database of all of our emails, search histories, visited websites, purchases, and everything else a fascist government might want.
Many people and pundits are thinking and writing about Trump being truly insane.
How many truly insane people have ever increased their net worth by 3 billion dollars in 18 months?
He is sane enough to enable his con to millions of believers while paralyzing any powers that try to stop him.
Scotus decisions he doesn’t like-ignored.
Laws on congressional appropriations-ignored
Trolling half the country day and night
Averaged 30 stock trades per day
Enriching his criminal friends and using the feds to torment his political enemies.
Silencing media
DOJ-
FBI
Pentagon
Elections chaos
The overthrow of our country is in the early innings. Trump, Bibi, Putin, and the world’s oligarchs overlapping with the Epstein class, will continue the power grab.
Doesn’t seem insane to me, just very evil and devious
"A year and a half has passed since that freezing cold day in Washington when Joe and Jill Biden climbed into a helicopter outside the front steps of the Capitol as Donald and Melania Trump and JD and Usha Vance stood together and waved goodbye. Their legacy and standing within their party blown to smithereens, the Biden clan stayed pretty quiet until now." ...
"[Biden's] pitch for re-election was that because he beat Mr. Trump before, he could prevent his return. He would talk about Mr. Trump like he was an aberrant blip in American history, a fluke of 'semi-fascism,' 'not who we are.' But the opposite turned out to be true. Mr. Trump is the dominant political figure of our age. Mr. Biden was the blip."
Unfortunately MapQuest isn't a good option for anyone who lives in a major US city and uses public transportation. MapQuest seems to be completely unaware of the existence of public transportation, meanwhile google has been giving me train and bus directions for over a decade. It's not like 2/3 of the US Population lives in or near a major city.
I actually use HERE WeGo, and it's been fantastic for me. I was a Nokia fan back in the day, so I've been using some version of it for forever. It's actually really good, believe it or not. I find it much less frustrating than Google Maps, which I kind of hate anyway. It does NOT have Lake Ontario mis-named.
I put some 'aard work into this post, heh, heh, heh: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/aardvark-in-da-yaard-clark
Also, here is a meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/a22e55d6-e485-49bd-bc1c-c48984df58f0
I 'aardly know what to say.
BABBY AARDVARK KITTEH!
WHAAR VARK?!
A baby aardvark is hairless and pink
if you can't spell the name,
you can't find a link.
I like aardvarks! I like to say, aardvark! too!
Oh, we've come to intermission so it's time to stretch your toes
And if you are an aardvark, you should also stretch your nose
When you hear the bell go "bing-bong!"
Intermission has begun
And when you hear another "bing-bong!"
Then intermission's done
https://genius.com/Aaaardvarks-the-intermission-song-lyrics
Aaaaaaarrrdvarks garden like a pirate.
'Aard vark or 'aardly varking?
Aaaaar you ready?
“Oh, fine, A-ARDVARK!”
Martini we appreciate your daily long and aarduous effort.
Did anyone here ever see the show "Wonderama". They had a song about aardvarks.
Wonderama had a grand prize, won by being first to find the key to a lock among many keys; for the two top winners. A close friend of the family had a secret conversation with the kid against whom he was competing. When he opened the box, he told Sonny Fox, the host, that his competitor had worked just as hard as he, and thought they should split the prizes. Sonny awarded both kids the entire grand prize. I believe that was the only time that ever happened.
(opens a box of childhood memories; shudders and closes it) Yes, I recall the show.
It was one of the first shows I saw after we got cable. I loved that show!
There had to be absolutely nothing else on and no one outside to play with and maybe even raining.
Richard linked it below!
Thank you for the meme....and for the earworm.
I'm an aardvark
And I'm proud
I'm an aardvark
And I'm happy
I'm an aardvark
If I tried to be specific
And a little scientific
I am feeling quite terrific (Sesame Street song)
My oldest daughter, when a very small child was given a stuffed aardvark to hold as a cuddle buddy. She kept it for some years and it, though much loved, over the years, got quite soiled. My wife decided it had gotten just too nasty and put it into the washer and ran it on a delicate cycle. The damn thing absolutely disintegrated. That's when the trouble started.
"And then the murders began . . . "
My daughter in a burst of creativity had named it Aardy.
Proud of my sister who named her stuffed dog Bonaparte.
I can top that I had a stuffy brontosaur named "Dino."
My daughter was creative too. She had an alligator she named, "Allie." I'm kind of jealous. I don't have a stuffed aardvark. I'll have to look for one.
It's a collection, not an obsession.
Hopefully it doesn't grow up to be like proto-Trump Cyril Sneer.
Ever watch the Ant and the Ardvaark cartoons? Jewish humor forever! The ant had a broken leg, and the Aardvark was going to suck him up. “With the cast on?” asked the ant. “It’ll add roughage!” replied the Aardvark. My dad split a gut laughing!
Great choice to start the week Martini! Aardvarks will be kosher forever, thanks to Frizz Freeling!
God, haven't seen those in forever. Didn't the aardvark have a Jackie Mason voice? Hell it could have been Jackie Mason..
I think it turned out it was voice actor doing a Jackie Mason bit.
Ev'ryone here / Has a right and left ear / But nobody here has an aardvark!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecpfMoIf5Vc
Sometimes one of the kids was prepared and had a picture of one!
when mtg (who is still a thirsty bitch) is being more reasonable and denouncing you, you've gotten well into the weeds, loomer
You really can't make this shit up.
if this were an episode of west wing the writers would be told to dial it back as too unbelievable
I am astounded at what MAGA will accept from someone with an R after their name. We on the left have made jokes about their propensity with having sex with farm animals for decades, and they go through the roof every. single. time.
Someone with an R after their name basically makes the same joke, a brown man with a foreign-sounding name no less, and they're like, "Hurr! He gets me."
"That's one sexxy aardvark. I would totally understand if one of my agents wanted some of that"
- Kash Patel, probably
It's 1:45 pm on Monday. I guess I should put on some pants or something.
It's a trap! Once you put on pants, people expect you to do things. Mostly for them.
How long after Dear Leader’s gone will Google wait to switch it back to Lake Ontario and try to pretend like they never caved? Five seconds? Three?
Let's Ask Kalshi!
Whatever pays them the most $$$.
Google has the power, money, and influence to tell Donald Trump to fuck off with his ridiculous naming bullshit. But instead of "doing no evil," they're enabling a junior fascist and have an endless database of all of our emails, search histories, visited websites, purchases, and everything else a fascist government might want.
Many people and pundits are thinking and writing about Trump being truly insane.
How many truly insane people have ever increased their net worth by 3 billion dollars in 18 months?
He is sane enough to enable his con to millions of believers while paralyzing any powers that try to stop him.
Scotus decisions he doesn’t like-ignored.
Laws on congressional appropriations-ignored
Trolling half the country day and night
Averaged 30 stock trades per day
Enriching his criminal friends and using the feds to torment his political enemies.
Silencing media
DOJ-
FBI
Pentagon
Elections chaos
The overthrow of our country is in the early innings. Trump, Bibi, Putin, and the world’s oligarchs overlapping with the Epstein class, will continue the power grab.
Doesn’t seem insane to me, just very evil and devious
If you’re in NC and went to a petting zoo in the past couple of months, you might want to look into this: https://www.cnn.com/2026/08/29/us/nc-petting-zoo-rabies-exposure
A baby aardvark is hairless and pink
if you can't spell the name,
you can't find a link.
Cool spider news (albeit from a couple of months back): https://religionnews.com/2026/06/15/a-native-naming-ceremony-welcomes-newly-discovered-spider-into-community-of-the-land/
Nice Times!
I love this so much!
Wonderful article. Thanks for sharing.
A 17-year-old in Indonesia helps fight fires, dressed as Superman.
Why is he doing that?
To honor everyone fighting fires in Indonesia. He's brave to do that.
https://bbc.com/news/videos/cp84ql8lld9o
No capes!
Especially in an active fire zone.
Wow. I hope he gets rid of the cape.
Earth pig!
Tee heee!
Cute leetle guys. Hug, hug. :) :)
Melinda Gates matched Olivia Rodrigo’s $10 million donation to 10 women and girls’ organizations at Rodrigo’s inaugural Daisy Chains Fields Festival.
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/melinda-gates-olivia-rodrigo-donate-20-million-to-women-and-girls-organizations_n_6a947066e4b05bad05884444?origin=home-whats-happening-unit
Truth Social toot: “Kharg Island being blown to smithereens!!! President DJT.”
I haven't heard anyone use the word "smithereens" since I was seven. And I'm an old.
I bet Trump has this appalling NY Times piece about Joe Biden from June 2026 read to him often. "The Bidens Return to the Stage: Online, in Bookstores and at a Best Western in South Dakota" https://www.nytimes.com/2026/06/06/us/politics/biden-speech-sioux-falls-trump.html, https://archive.ph/1z6VC
"A year and a half has passed since that freezing cold day in Washington when Joe and Jill Biden climbed into a helicopter outside the front steps of the Capitol as Donald and Melania Trump and JD and Usha Vance stood together and waved goodbye. Their legacy and standing within their party blown to smithereens, the Biden clan stayed pretty quiet until now." ...
"[Biden's] pitch for re-election was that because he beat Mr. Trump before, he could prevent his return. He would talk about Mr. Trump like he was an aberrant blip in American history, a fluke of 'semi-fascism,' 'not who we are.' But the opposite turned out to be true. Mr. Trump is the dominant political figure of our age. Mr. Biden was the blip."
So, next he'll say Kharg took a shellacking.
Unfortunately MapQuest isn't a good option for anyone who lives in a major US city and uses public transportation. MapQuest seems to be completely unaware of the existence of public transportation, meanwhile google has been giving me train and bus directions for over a decade. It's not like 2/3 of the US Population lives in or near a major city.
I actually use HERE WeGo, and it's been fantastic for me. I was a Nokia fan back in the day, so I've been using some version of it for forever. It's actually really good, believe it or not. I find it much less frustrating than Google Maps, which I kind of hate anyway. It does NOT have Lake Ontario mis-named.
Google's plan: make people dependent on their product or service, then turn on them for profit and standing with a fascist.
Apple maps still has Lake Ontario.