13 Comments
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Spurning Beer's avatar

Hey, it's not a robe! It's a black kimono, thank you very much.

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SullivanSt's avatar

Moore makes a better unspoken argument that it might at first seem:

"Gov., the courts are filled with fucking morons like me, who don't know what the fuck they're talking about. Why listen?"

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SullivanSt's avatar

<blockquote>Judge Moore doesn’t answer this, but if Dok Zoom fucks a goat, which births a Satyr, would Dok be committing bestiality or incest if he the banged said Satyr? Someone page Dan Savage…</blockquote>

Sounds like a recipe for Habsburg chin, with a beard.

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God Emperor Emeritus's avatar

Dr. Zoom libel!

It's common knowledge that he cavorts mainly with ponies.

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dslindc's avatar

Interpreting law like it's 1885? In the South? The hell you say!

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JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

<i>“the union <b>for life</b> of one man and one woman in the holy estate of matrimony"</i>

If he's right, we have a crumbling foundation. Especially in Alabama and the South, where <a href="https:\/\/contemporaryfamilies.org\/impact-of-conservative-protestantism-on-regional-divorce-rates\/" target="_blank">divorce rates</a> are highest (by a lot).

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schmannity's avatar

It's Alabama; he just wants to turn his "hose" on those gay couples.

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Ilgattomorte's avatar

"Judge Moore doesn’t answer this, but if Dok Zoom fucks a goat, which births a Satyr, would Dok be committing bestiality or incest if he the banged said Satyr?"

Actually he would be committing bestiality, homosexuality, sodomy and incest, or as we heathen like to call it, "The Quadruple Crown of Sin". Congratulations and a big thumbs up to Dok if he can manage this. I'm pulling for him. Uh, I mean that in the vernacular .. you know .. not actually pulling on my ah .. you know, anything.

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Joshua Norton's avatar

<i> just pulling craziness out of his godly ass,</i>

“The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. An evil soul producing holy witness Is like a villain with a smiling cheek, A goodly apple rotten at the heart. O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!”

― William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice

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JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

<i>He also said that marriage equality is literally the work of the Devil, alleging that it is leading to divine wrath in the form of economic and societal suffering.</i>

God sucks at divine wrath. Unemployment, teen pregnancy, crime, poverty and the abortion rate have all declined as same-sex marriage expanded in the U.S. Life expectancy and infant mortality have improved at the same time. Even deaths due to extreme weather are basically declining (though it's erratic).

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Fitzgerald Chesterfield's avatar

<i>“both for the welfare of this state and for our posterity.”</i>

That was a typo. He meant to say "our posteriors."

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The Quirk's avatar

No, no-- he's talking about John Waters' late friend, Divine.

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Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

Roy Moore is no George Wallace. He should stop pretending that he is.

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