Florida governor Rick Scott is one of those charming sociopath fundamentalist teabagger fiscal responsibility screamers who will nonetheless spend millions of taxpayer dollars to make absolutely sure that the government isn't giving a single $104 check to a poor drug user even as the state cuts school funding, just to prove he is an annoying hardass. So far, only 2.5% of welfare recipients have tested positive, making this a very expensive joke Rick Scott is playing on poors and taxpayers. But since "government savings" is nominally the reason behind drug testing state check recipients, Miami Herald columnist and novelist Carl Hiaasen, god bless him,
This is a great idea. What would be even better is to save all the urine from these whiz quizzes and when Dick Cheney drops dead we can pour the piss on his grave.
Note to Rick Perry: If choose to do this in Texas, I strongly recommend you purchase the book "How to Pass The Urine Examination." It's available on your Kindle for $3.99. It will help you pass this exam.
Hmmm, he looks like he might be one of them Nowegian Freedom Fighters now that you mention it. Hiaasen the Assassin.
Didn't Doonesbury come up w/ something like this a long time ago? "Friends, I have come to give SPECIMEN!"
I think there is medical necessity to that plan. To make sure the urine is from the identified individual, it must be collected via cystoscope.
The spikes are not technically necessary, but why not? They're Florida legislators, you know?
<i>because everyone knows, married couples don&#039;t share the wealth</i>
Joe Walsh is on line 2 for you. He was wondering if you&#039;d like to become a star (witness)?
Hey..wait a minute. Hiaasen...isn&#039;t that one of them A-rab names?
As J.J. Walker said about drug testing postal employees, you sure aren&#039;t going to find out they are on speed.
Scattering the powder all over the mirror?
This is a great idea. What would be even better is to save all the urine from these whiz quizzes and when Dick Cheney drops dead we can pour the piss on his grave.
Note to Rick Perry: If choose to do this in Texas, I strongly recommend you purchase the book &quot;How to Pass The Urine Examination.&quot; It&#039;s available on your Kindle for $3.99. It will help you pass this exam.
Has Scott responded with anything other than a derisive snort?