My fellow Americans, Remember when you were really excited to get an email from me, even though you were pretty sure someone else wrote it? Me too. Those were good days. This Christmas, I thought it would be nice if I could give you that feeling again. The catch is that you have to help me by pretending a few things. Pretend it's early 2009 and the normal rules of politics for whatever reason don't apply to a president you really, really like. Pretend that the Democrats still control every branch of government, and that the Democrats are actually interested in helping me fulfill my campaign promises. Pretend that you're really excited for this thing called "Obamacare," which is going to be great even though the idea came from a conservative think tank, Mitt Romney was the first guy to try it, and it depends on insurance companies not being total dicks. Can you imagine that?
Obamacare is the greatest wealth transfer program since Soshecurity, in that it transfers wealth from decent, hard-working Americans to health insurance companies. You're welcome!
<blockquote>What is the Southern Strategy? It is this. It says to the South: Let the poor stay poor, let your economy trail the nation, forget about decent homes and medical care for all your people, choose officials who will oppose every effort to benefit the many at the expense of the few&mdash;and in return, we will try to overlook the rights of the black man, appoint a few southerners to high office, and lift your spirits by attacking the &lsquo;eastern establishment&rsquo; whose bank accounts we are filling with your labor and your industry.</blockquote> Merry Christmas nonetheless!
In the spirit of believing twelve impossible things before breakfast, I&#039;d like to wish you, personally, Mr. President, and I know you will read this, a very Merry Christmas! And Sasha and Malia, enjoy your holiday break! And Mrs. Obama (may I call you Michelle? I feel as if I know you), I hope you will consider Michelle/Hillary 2016, because it&#039;ll be fun to watch the wingnuts&#039; heads explode! Love, Goodgawd_yall
Obamacare is the greatest wealth transfer program since Soshecurity, in that it transfers wealth from decent, hard-working Americans to health insurance companies. You&#039;re welcome!
George McGovern (remember him?):
<blockquote>What is the Southern Strategy? It is this. It says to the South: Let the poor stay poor, let your economy trail the nation, forget about decent homes and medical care for all your people, choose officials who will oppose every effort to benefit the many at the expense of the few&mdash;and in return, we will try to overlook the rights of the black man, appoint a few southerners to high office, and lift your spirits by attacking the &lsquo;eastern establishment&rsquo; whose bank accounts we are filling with your labor and your industry.</blockquote> Merry Christmas nonetheless!
In the spirit of believing twelve impossible things before breakfast, I&#039;d like to wish you, personally, Mr. President, and I know you will read this, a very Merry Christmas! And Sasha and Malia, enjoy your holiday break! And Mrs. Obama (may I call you Michelle? I feel as if I know you), I hope you will consider Michelle/Hillary 2016, because it&#039;ll be fun to watch the wingnuts&#039; heads explode! Love, Goodgawd_yall
He&#039;s no John Ghandi Martin Luther Kennedy Lennon but I guess he&#039;ll do for now
BOXING DAY LIBEL!!1!1!!!
(Yes, Ted Cruz, we know.)
ken?
merry christmas everyone. may your 2014 be filled with snark and wonkette and ham biscuits.
Me too, and I did it from Tan Son Nhut AB, RVN.
Billy and the Boingers or GTFO!
You had me at <i>2009</i>.
Now, excuse me while I change my underthings.