479 Comments

William Safire's conspiracy theories about Hillz are still out there twenty-some odd years after he wrote them and they were all mentioned ad nauseam during the last election cycle. Pizzagate will never die as long as their are nutbags willing to believe any conspiracy that makes her out to be a villain.

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I was just about to say the same thing. And I live on a fucking island, the store is closed, and we don't even have pizza sauce that I can pour over toast, mozzarella, and..and...shit...we don't have any kind of deli meat, pepperoni or otherwise in the house. We do have some velveeta though. Fuck

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Hide them in closed Walmart mega-box stores.

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Because it would be harder to blame those on Clinton.

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The local DC news said no shots were fired, but they've been wrong before. Did I miss something?

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Omfg! This urban legend needs to be put into a dump far away and the earth salted.

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Because they'd rather be the traffickers and slave-owners?

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"Trumptitude"?

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Was it unpresidented?

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It's a special kind of ignorance and separation from reality.

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Sounds like there isn't exactly much of a diverse market.

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And here I thought these folks were firmly on the Blue Lives Matter side of the rioters barricade.

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"We do have some Velveeta though."

What, you need to putty a window?

Jaywho'sfat, last time I was suffering from critical munchies, home repair was far from my mind...

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The pizzagate gunman, one "Edgar Maddison (2 Ds, no waiting!) Welch pled guilty to compound douchebaggery and aggravated stupidity or some such. He got 4 years.

The imbecile fired several shots because he couldn't get into a locked cabinet. Thankfully, through no fault of his own, the defective didn't hit anyone. He was genuinely surprised there were no children for sale.

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So did they put child meat on the pizzas? I want to try that - extra cheese and well done.

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Where did the dirt from digging a cavern go?

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