House GOP Figures It's Safe To Ban Abortion Now That Everyone's Stopped Paying Attention

As further evidence that the GOP really "gets" chicks, House Republicans murdered the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act to ban abortions after 20 weeks back in January, which they'd hoped to pass on the anniversary ofRoe v. Wade, to be dicks. But five months is enough time to get over that, right? So they're planning to bring it up for a vote again next week:

The House of Representatives will vote on a bill next week that would ban nearly all late-term abortions, House majority leader Kevin McCarthy tells THE WEEKLY STANDARD. [...]

The new House bill also has some added provisions that Republican sources say aim to protect the lives of infants and the well-being of mothers. These include protections for infants born alive in the process of an abortion, an informed consent form for those women seeking an abortion that describes the law and the gestational age of the child in the womb, and empowerment of women with a civil right of action against abortion providers who fail to comply with the law.

Funny, because we coulda sworn we've heard Republicans say, about a zillion times, that one of the best ways to cut the costs of healthcare is TORT REFORM, because it's just too easy to sue doctors into bankruptcy, and that's why healthcare is so expensive. Guess they've had a change of heart. So of course this will will make it easier to sueallphysicians right? Nah, just the abortion kind.

So why did Republicans abort the original bill in the first place? Did they suddenly realize that (a) you can't ban abortions because that's not constitutional, the Supreme Court says so; (2) lady voters don't like conservative dudes all up in their snatches; or (III) it's a waste of time to pass a bill Senate Democrats will never in a million years support and the president said he would veto extra hard? Haha, don't be ridiculous. A couple lady Republicans in the House -- who had previously supported the exact same bill -- suddenly discovered how concerned they were about a particular provision regarding the definition of rape, after the entire media was like "OH HEY, Republicans are talking about 'legitimate rape' again, what assholes!"

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The earlier version of the bill, which Republicans have been pushing since 2013, included an exception for victims of rape, but only if they had gone to the police to file a report. No police report, no rape, no exception, YOU WILL HAVE THAT BABY! But Republicans have fixed that part now, so no one should have any problem with a bill that says abortion should be UNLEGAL after 20 weeks because it hurts the babies, even though there is no scientific evidence of that, but science is dumb anyway so who cares?

Instead, the legislation requires abortion doctors to ensure that victims have received either medical treatment or licensed counseling at least 48 hours prior to the late-term procedure.

FINE, you don't have to go to the police after you've been raped, but youdohave to get counseling first, not because you've been raped, of course -- rape is just one of those liberal college campus myths, like evolution -- but to ensure that a licensed professional has the opportunity to talk you out of aborting your rapist's love child.

That's much better for women who've been raped, and since the big "pro-life" organizations are jizzing themselves about this new bill, as it's clearly the next step toward banning all abortions for everyone, it's sure to pass with plenty of bipartisan support, because it's for theladies, ya see, to protectthem, so how could they and their baby-killin' Democrat enablers possibly take issue with it now?

[ Weekly Standard via RightWingWatch ]