If This Hillary Clinton Ad Doesn't Make You Cry, You Are Dead Inside

Martha Soltani of Jamestown, NC has a story to tell you about her daughter Sara.

Oh hi, Wonkers, are your eyes very dirty right now from all the sexxx porn you watch, and need to be cleaned out with healthy human tears? AS USUAL. Well, you are in luck, because Hillary Clinton, damn her, has released a seven-minute ad that made intern Dominic cry and made Editrix Rebecca cry, and it is about healthcare policy. (Wut?) No, for reals!

You see, fighting for children has been at the forefront of Hillary Clinton's 30 years of experience in public service, and one of the things she fought hard for was the SCHIP children's health insurance program, which since the 1990s has given health insurance to MILLIONS of kids. And wouldn't you know it, but lots of those families are grateful to Hillary for her hard work in that area!

This is the story of Martha Soltani and her daughter, Sara, who was born deaf and premature. Martha explains that, to give her daughter the best shot in life, they started hearing and speech therapy from the beginning, but as their hometown paper in Greensboro, North Carolina, explains, the cochlear implant Sara needed was $60,000. Moreover, as the paper explains, because Sara required so much care, her mom quit her job and her dad was self-employed. They were in that weird middle zone where they were way too "rich" for Medicaid, but also normal people who cannot just fling $60,000 at problems:

But the Soltanis did qualify for coverage under the program Clinton championed.

Known as the Children’s Health Insurance Program, coverage provided hearing aids and upgrades for Sara, who is now a college junior majoring in archaeology and anthropology, and has worked at the Smithsonian Institution.

Because of Hillary's SCHIP program, that $60,000 price tag amounted to a $10 deductible for Martha and Sara.

Martha Soltani also explains that the work Hillary did for the Children's Defense Fund, to make sure disabled kids can get a good public education, contributed significantly to Sara's ability to become the woman she is today. Ready to watch the ad and CRY SO MUCH YOUR EYES FALL OUT OF YOUR FACE? Here you go:

As we've said one million times at this point, Hillary Clinton's ad game is STRONG. (Just like her ground game and her debate game and her hot sauce game and her SICK BURNING DONALD J. TRUMP ON TWITTER game.)

Heck, she came out with another ad Friday, that will make you cry also too! It features Khizr Khan, the Gold Star dad Donald Trump decided to shit on, as a way of Making America Great Again. He just wants to know, after his Muslim son's sacrifice for the United States, would his war hero son even have a place in Donald Trump's America?

Doktor Zoom didn't cry at the ad above, because he was busy Not Crying watching this one, according to him:

And now your eyes are all clean, from your silly boo-hoo blubber sobs, and you are going to vote for Hillary Clinton at least 30 more times than you were planning to HAHA JUST KIDDING VOTER FRAUD IS A MYTH.

(OR IS IT?)

[ Hillary Clinton / Greensboro.com ]