James Comer Will Hold Hunter Biden In Contempt If He Keeps Threatening To Tell Congress The Truth On Live TV
James Comer Will Hold Hunter Biden In Contempt If He Keeps Threatening To Tell Congress The Truth On Live TV
Whatever, pigfuck.
House Oversight Committee Chairman James Comer just opened another Beanie Weenie can full of his own dick and started chewing. As if it wasn’t embarrassing enough when it was revealed that his last big Hunter Biden GOTCHA! was that Joe Biden, China’s Hunter’s dad, had bought China Hunter a pickup truck and made a few payments on it, because China Hunter was in a really bad place and had bad credit at the time.
Just before that, Hunter’s lawyer Abbe Lowell and Hunter himself had handed Comer a can of those Beanie Weenies over the subpoena the committee had recently sent for Hunter’s deposition. Hunter and Lowell embarrassed Comer and House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jim Jordan by saying “Sure! We are so excited to have Hunter come in and testify on live TV in Congress! He’ll answer your every question, no matter how irrelevant or dumb as shit! Ohhhhhhhh, so exciting, so exciting! Hunter has always wanted to be on TV, OHHHHHHHHHHHH! What are we going to wear? OMG OMG OMG!” (Paraphrase.)
That is not what Comer wanted to happen. He and Jordan wanted Hunter behind closed doors, so they could feel free to lie to Fox News about what he said, instead of giving Hunter an opportunity to throw Comer’s Beanie Weenies at his face on TV.
Lowell and Hunter offered again. Here is their letter:
Like assholes, Lowell and Comer quoted a bunch of times Comer had gone on TV and strummed his hillbilly banjo to the effect of saying that Hunter was welcome to come testify any time any place ANY TV CHANNEL, and shoved them back up Comer’s butt. “We can bring these people in for depositions or committee hearings, whichever they choose,” he said to Benny Johnson. “Hunter Biden is more than welcome to come in front of the committee … he’s invited today. We will drop everything,” he told Newsmax.
The letter closed by explaining that since Comer and his fellow Republicans have shown everybody what lying pigfuck motherfucking trashfucks they are by constantly lying like pigfuck motherfucking trashfucks — paraphrase; Lowell’s exact words were “[T]he Committee has demonstrated time and again it uses closed-door sessions to manipulate, even distort, the facts and misinform the American public” — then let’s just do this in public, ‘kay?
Comer is squealing like newborn Kentucky livestock, obviously, and he and Jordan are threatening to hold Hunter in contempt if Hunter doesn’t come in for a private deposition, so that afterward, Comer and Jordan can immediately run to Fox News with their pee-pees out and lie about what Hunter said. Here is their latest letter back to Lowell and Hunter:
“On November 8, 2023, we issued subpoenas to your client, Robert Hunter Biden, for a deposition on December 13, 2023. We received your letters dated November 28, 2023, and December 6, 2023, concerning the deposition subpoenas. Contrary to the assertions in your letter, there is no ‘choice’ for Mr. Biden to make; the subpoenas compel him to appear for a deposition on December 13. If Mr. Biden does not appear for his deposition on December 13, 2023, the Committees will initiate contempt of Congress proceedings.”
What very big men, ooh big scary guys, wouldn’t you be scared if those guys were after you? And why not?
Don’t quote us on this, but we think Hunter and Abbe Lowell might tell Comer and Jordan to eat some more of those cans of Beanie Weenies again.
In hell.
Oversight Committee ranking Democrat Jamie Raskin is making fun of Comer, obviously:
Hunter Biden will answer questions under oath in front of the world—but unless he testifies in secret so he can be misquoted,
will hold him in contempt? What a joke. Jim Jordan blew off HIS subpoena. Comer doesn’t want the truth—and can’t handle it.
Chickenshit ass pigfuck, he didn’t add, but Wonkette did, because there is no legal limit for how many times you can call James Comer a pigfuck in one blog post, the end.
Evan Hurst on Twitter right here.
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Maybe Hunter should just turn up to the next committee meeting and wait outside the door.
"Like assholes, Lowell and Comer quoted a bunch of times Comer had gone on TV"
Comer is at the point where he's working against himself eh?