Fish Union Unamused By Radioactive Sushi, Demands Compensation

• A trade group representing Japanese fishermen (see: scummy fish union) has called TEPCO -- the company that owns the nuclear power plant that is currently exploding -- incompetent and "unforgivable." Specifically, the group is less than thrilled about Tokyo Electric and the Japanese government deciding to dump 11,500 tons of radioactive water into the Pacific Ocean, resulting in, among other problems, radioactive fish and eels. But the ocean is so big and 11,500 tons is not that much radioactive water-goo, so these fishermen are probably just a bunch of whiny extortionists! (Just like the lazy fishermen on the Gulf Coast, who keep asking for handouts/"alive" baby dolphins.) Geezus. Authorities have allegedly plugged up the radioactive leaks in the reactors, so maybe conditions will improve and everything will be okay? Ha-ha, Maybe. [ CNN / BBC ]

• Oh great, something new & miserable: There is a serial killer on the prowl in Long Island! [ CBS ]

• Wachovia laundered billions of dollars for Mexican drug cartels -- but bankers aren't allowed to go to prison, since they are upstanding citizens with sweet tax breaks. Meanwhile: Wells Fargo, which owns Wachovia, has been fined (only) $11.2 million for selling shitty investments to people who selfishly hoped they could retired before 80. [ The Guardian / McClatchy ]

• Oil prices continue to hinder America's Economic Recovery. (Wait, what recovery?) We thought that the Freedum for Oil pact that we signed with CIA agents pretending to be Libyan rebels was working? [ AP ]