475 Comments

On the other hand, if you stand close enough to Judge Jeanine and inhale deeply, you can still get drunk on just the fumes.

Expand full comment

Boy, what a dirty, lowdown, evil trick. I mean, I was hating MM even before it became a status symbol.

Expand full comment

It might just be stuck in that position and he can't not raise it. Sort of like McKayla Maroney's smirk, except I think she can move her mouth to a normal position.

Expand full comment

290 days, if my calculations are correct.

I hope.

Expand full comment

Or Borgias.

Expand full comment

Their best solar-powered, eco-friendly, composting tumbrels.

Expand full comment

Oh, c'mon. I'll be that at least one of them is on the couch, just like Tony Soprano or that Martin Blank guy from Grosse Pointe Blank. Because even if they enjoy inflicting harm, at least one of them has trouble sleeping because of it.

Expand full comment

See my comment to SineDie above.

Expand full comment

If the facts to not fit, they must be eliminated, ignored, or twisted to fit the pre-existing policy.

Expand full comment

You know, in many ways I've thought that this will only hit home -- at least with most of the public -- when a really big celebrity succumbs. Sort of like how Reagan thought that AIDS was no big deal until his old buddy Rock Hudson came down with it. Tom Hanks might have been that person but a) he's well-known to be a liberal, so Fox would just have said "good riddance" and b) he's recovered. But who knows . . . especially if that someone is beloved on the right.

Expand full comment

The Borgias flourished. The Romanovs met an... unfortunate end.

Expand full comment

I was in a generous mood. But he isn't quite bright enough to realize he's no genius. The most dangerous kind of smart. Or maybe the second-most.

Expand full comment

But if her lips explode, you would be spattered with silicone, Botox, and collagen. As they may do, at any moment. Be careful!Or just let me offer you a drink.

Expand full comment

I mean Jared. He's a gay as a three dollar bill, and that's something I know for a fact. Ivanka only gets with gay men. Always has.

Expand full comment

Good point.

Expand full comment

Sorry. I don't owe Kushner anything, and neither does anyone else.

Expand full comment