JD Vance Welcomes All Jews To Participate In Christmas
Deal with it.
In yet another seasonal blunder that’s become almost as much a Hanukkah tradition as wondering how kids in olden days got excited about dreidels or “A Rugrats Chanukah,” Vice President JD Vance’s office sent out invitations to a Hanukkah celebration at the Veep’s residence that treated the Jewish holiday as just one more part of Christmas. Twice!
But don’t worry, it wasn’t a mistake; it was actually a conscious decision, OK? That makes it all better!
Here’s the invite, spotted by Jewish Insider reporter Gabby Deutch, who posted the image to social media Wednesday (Mediaite link). “Hanukkah” at least got the biggest typeface, but it’s underneath a heading that’s all about the Christian holiday:
We initially thought a “Golden Noel” might be some kinky sex act defined only on Urban Dictionary, but then we shouted “Enhance!” and saw the all-caps explanation: “CELEBRATING 50 YEARS OF CHRISTMAS AT THE VICE PRESIDENT’S RESIDENCE.”
Super-classy, and very Christmassy, because Jesus is the reason for the season. Kind of has nothing to do with Hanukkah, though. Or at least so you proles might have thought.
As The Independent reports, a spokesman for Vance explained that “The same branding for invitations was used for all holiday parties at the Vice President’s Residence,” so it was simply a matter of keeping design consistency, not any sort of religious message, silly. The spox continued blathering, “The Vance family is celebrating 50 historic years of Christmas at the Vice President's Residence. They look forward to welcoming all of their guests.”
Donald Trump and JD Vance’s America is a Christian Nationalist America, so of course even Jewish holidays are part of the same Judeo-Christian (but really, just Christian) heritage we all share. Just remember that the “Judeo” part is silent, like the “t” in “Christmas” or the “Donald Trump” in “Epstein Files.”
We can only hope that this year’s Trump and Vance Christmakkah parties don’t turn out like the 2020 Hanukkah bash at the Trump White House, which ended up being a COVID-19 superspreader event.
As every story about this deliberate error points out, this isn’t the first time presidential Hanukkah cards have similarly fucked up. In 2008, the George W. Bush White House sent out invitations to a Hanukkah reception, but the cards had the same image as their Christmas cards, a picture of a snowy White House with wreaths in the windows and an olde-fashioned horse-drawn wagon delivering a Christmas tree.
But the other outlets didn’t go to the bother of tracking down that ridiculous image, while Yr Wonkette did:
At least the Bush team had the sense to apologize instead of insisting that Hanukkah was intentionally treated as a subcategory of Christmas. Sally McDonough, Laura Bush’s press secretary, said that “Mrs. Bush is apologetic,” but it was an oversight that “just slipped through the cracks” as the Bushes were preparing to leave the White House. Heck, she didn’t even blame the mistake on Barack Hussein Obama! No wonder Trumpers hate W.
A few days later, the White House sent out new invites to the reception, with an image of the menorah given to President Truman by Israeli Prime Minister David Ben-Gurion after Truman was among the first world leaders to recognize Israel’s statehood in 1948.
Included in the second-try invitation was a smaller card reading “Please accept our apologies as the invitation you previously received had the incorrect artwork.” Pretty classy, although it would have been even better if it had added that “those responsible have been sacked.”
And while it wasn’t a president, just a failed presidential candidate, Yr Wonkette will always be delighted by the festive greetings in an old email by Wisconsin’s future Gov. Scott Walker, from his time as Milwaukee County executive. Walker replied to Milwaukee attorney Franklyn Gimbel that he’d be happy to put up a menorah in the Milwaukee County Courthouse, and added a festive closing: “Thank you again and Molotov.”
Way better holiday tradition than that Adam Sandler movie! May your own Hanukkah be incendiary extraordinary!
[Mediaite / Independent / LaGuardia and Wagner Archives]
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I decided to re-use the T-Rex menorah pic, from a few years back, but only after searching for "weird menorahs" and considering (then rejecting) this incredible, apparently one-off, menorah featuring Star Trek action figures from the original series, Next Generation, and Deep State Nine. (Yes, that's what I call it).
https://eclecticjudaica.com/products/star-trek-collector-menorah-judaica-hanukkah-repurposed-figures-spock-captain-kirk-vintage
Maybe I'll toss together a weird menorahs post as the holiday gets closer.
During the first White House Chanukiah lighting in 1992, Bill Clinton efficiently smothered the burning hair of a kindergarten classmate of my oldest son.