380 Comments
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Riggs Veda's avatar

Thank you for this, Dok. It’s been so hard to laugh at things or enjoy the holidays this year. Molotov!!

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HarryButtle, degenerate artist's avatar

You go to a party at JD Vance's.

Do you sit on the couch?

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Toomush Expectashuns's avatar

See, you got the first part wrong...

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LOU LOU's avatar
28mEdited

Taking the time to get context is not something run of the mill narcissists take the time to do, because they are so convinced their way is the superior way. Recently i got 200 plus replies on one comment on a local government social media post about a white supremacy march shutdown. The white supremacy people argued consistently that BLM and Palestinian protests are no different than white supremacy protests so there, they should be allowed too. My only comment said that there is a core difference and that an education system that educated people how to discern is needed so people can understand the difference. The white supremacy supporters doubled down with insults focused on me probably being a woke, ignorant, self loathing white female, cat person, and liberal. Just got to ignore their ignorance and let them metaphorically or other wise self-immolate.

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RocktonSam's avatar

Guests may wear rubber gloves and masks at Sha-Dees reeducation celebration.

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Richard S's avatar

I wonder what you'd see if you did a further "zoom and enhance" on the house at the top of the invite....

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Punny Name's avatar

Feels like a missed opportunity for W to have called it a Hanukkah Bush

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swmnguy's avatar

If J Divan hands out gifts, he'll no doubt use this wrapping paper:

https://swmnguy.substack.com/p/worst-hannukah-wrapping-paper-ever

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RocktonSam's avatar

The maze of light to xmas

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swmnguy's avatar

With swastikas. Whoopsie-daisies. And it was sold as Hannukah gift wrap, because of the blue geometric design that looks Greek or Jewish.

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Bear: PROTECT THE AMERICUB's avatar

This administration has finally reached peak Cheryl Tunt.

"If you see Conway, tell him his Secret Santa wants to come early. Or, you know, whoever brings Jewish people their Christmas presents."

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Russell Jones's avatar

"The Golden Noel with the Vice President and the Second Lady" sounds like horror on a par with those 1970s Hammer Films flicks starring the late, great Christopher Lee.

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Richard S's avatar

A cheap Amicus knock-off, though.

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Maryland Bear's avatar

Someone better versed in such matters, please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it true that Hannukah is not one of the major Jewish holidays and the main reason gentiles notice it at all is because it occurs near Christmas?

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RocktonSam's avatar

I blame Adam Sandler...

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Notorious J.I.M.'s avatar

" now gimme some candy!"

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swmnguy's avatar

That's what my future daughter-in-law says.

But her family celebrates Christmas anyway, because tree, decorations, presents, candy; why wouldn't you? They're more traditional about it than my decidedly not-Jewish family ever was.

Of course, we aren't Theists at all so my new in-laws' Christmas observances and my family's are equally secular and all about the universal and pleasant stuff, at a time of year that's cold, dark and dreary at our latitude.

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Toomush Expectashuns's avatar

And, um, I think most of the northern nations all had solstice celebrations. And, as you certainly know, many of the "Christian" icons (trees, for instance) went back long before Christ was born in a far foreign place...

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swmnguy's avatar

If we didn't do something nice and fun at this time of year, there wouldn't be any of us left by the time the snow melts.

People who live in southern climes don't get my joke that February is the longest month of the year.

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Bear: PROTECT THE AMERICUB's avatar

Oh, JD, JD, JD / I made you out of clay / But now for your destruction / I fervently shall pray.

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Ellie Alive In 25's avatar

If it wasn't for Haym Salomon, there might not be a White House for Short Fingers to mutilate, nor a VP residence. But, this regime does like to rewrite history, when they aren't simply ignoring it.

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Suel J's avatar

Stop it with the golden eff noel. Is everything cheap plastic now? Guess so. Trump world where nothing is as it seems, it's all cheap imitation. I really really want a t rex menorah while we're at it. So what to do at this weird embarrassing Christmas for Jews party? It is like one of those Star Trek musicals. Thanks to other commenters for getting Star Trek stuck in my head. Jews for Jesus. (Apologies to all for that) Or something.

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Miss Grundy's avatar

Now that the Maybelline Man is a Roman Catholic he has entered the anti-semite wing of Christianity. So, of course, he is going to be an asshole regarding Hanukkah. If Usha had any sense she would take the kids and leave him behind.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

On the menu: ham sandwiches and bacon cheeseburgers

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Howlin Wolfe's avatar

“Molotov! Here, have a festive cocktail!”

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