245 Comments

i imagine the same thing would work.

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...yes, she is a VERY nice woman. I don't agree with very many of her beliefs but she has always treated me, my wife and son excellent. She has her points of view and I clearly have mine, but she has never treated me or my family any different despite being VERY religious

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No buttsechs and no birthday cake? Wow, JWs suck right out loud

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The animal shit is VERY important to JWs. They take "the lion shall lie down with the lamb" seriously. I.e. heaven means you get to snuggle tigers and cobras and they'll snuggle you back. LOL FURRIES

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Scientologists actually believe that those E-meters can read your mind. That's why Scientology is like North Korea without the barbed wire - you don't need barbed wire when your slaves honestly think you can read their minds.

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You see, that really gets me. Being dead forever really sounds MUCH MUCH BETTER than going to Jehovah's No Buttsex Tiger-Cuddling Playground.

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Myself am confuzed, dased, smart-founded, and dumb-assed. The Witnesses of Jehovah God Almighty teach that only the 144,000 chosen get into Heaven . . . and stuff. The rest get weeping, wailing, gnashing of teeth, fire, brimstone, devils, etc. So whether you do the Big Nasty from the near side, far side, odd side, or backside, neither you nor your brethren nor you sustren nor your children will see the streets of gold.

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Right on. I'm glad to hear you made it out successfully. I hope your family are less devout than mine and you're able to remain in contact with them. Not so in my case, but thankfully that seems to be less the norm these days than it used to be.

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I don't see the issue with your syllogism. Care to relieve me of my ignorance?

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My Baptist grandmother used to say "Worry is interest paid on a debt that never comes due." One could say the same thing about guilt. I reject guilt and sin and worry. Life is too short. I take one day at a time, and if when I go to bed I can say I did good and did no harm that day, then I am satisfied.

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I grew up JW and thankfully dodged the whole "disfellowship" thing by not getting baptized in the first place. One nice thing I can say about them is they put almost no pressure on me to get baptized or even increase my minimal amount of involvement. I'm sure others had worse experiences. Btw, the best thing about growing up JW is not having to pledge allegiance to the fucking flag :)

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Like many 19th century religious leaders, he's got that creepy uncle/grandfather vibe going.

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Charlie's or Hell's?

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Idk but we just had a teensy weensy earthquake .

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So, did he invent teh gheys, too? Or are they an unexpected side effect of the rainbows?

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Man, I've smoked a LOT of pot over the years, but I can't imagine how much it would take to get stoned to death. Pretty sure no pain would be involved, though. I always forget to say "Jehovah!", so maybe that's part of the problem.

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