Jesse Ventura/Howard Stern 2016 Is Your New Presidential Dream Tag Team
It really is never too early to look forward to the 2016 presidential race, if only because it has become a fantasy reference point for when we might have a functioning government again. Hahaha we will never have a functioning government again you guys come one. Right now, though, I'm putting all my money on the rumored Jesse Ventura/Howard Stern ticket, because if nothing else they are for sure going to capture that coveted Older Dude Who Still Rocks Long Hair And Smokes Pot Because Rebel demographic.
Ventura has yammered on about this before, but it sounds like he is finally ready to make his dreams - and all of ours, of course - come true by joining his creepy old man hairstyle with Howard Stern's creepy old man hairstyle to form a veritable Voltron of ick to run for president. READ MORE
the best C list celeb with creepy old man hairstyle they could come up with is Donald the Douche
...geez, this rant was a long time coming. So let me get this straight; Republicans go out of their way to push the Tea-Tard agenda to the forefront, all while gerrymandering the districts that said Tea-Tards are occupying so that they could never lose a primary, even if they took a(literal) shit on the American flag while jizzing on constitution?! All that considered I am glad that I have already began drinking on this wonderful Thursday morning(I'm off)! Now we have clueless fukk-up's like Marlin Stutzman actually saying that they don't have a clue in the holiest of hells what they want in return for not nose diving the economy of the worlds most powerful nation(?) into the unregulated land of Teabagistan. The only thing that keeps me from being sad(outside of double shots of Smirnoff while looking at the wonderful scenery of Miami) is the fact that I get to watch the most corrupt, racist, sexist, fascist, and overall worthless political party pour a gallon of gasoline down its pants and then light a match to smoke cigarette!!!
Oh yeah, and I always liked "Jimmy Super Fly Snukka" better anyways!!!