Judge Rules Bulldozers Down For Trump's Bunker Baby Ballroom!
Bummer.
Is there any sweeter sound than Donald John Trump, President of the USA and diva of stage, screen, and radio, being told NO?
And that’s what one federal judge for DC recently did, among the many others who have been telling him NO. But this one from Judge Richard J. Leon surely grates his heinie in particular. Leon, who was an appointee of George W. Bush even, has put a screeching halt to Trump’s $400 million ballroom project, granting the National Trust for Historic Preservation’s request for a preliminary injunction that blocks further work on his AI-Versailles nightmare, and telling him to go ask Congress.
The sizzler of a ruling is punctuated with no less than 17 exclamation points, four of them ending a one-word sentence — “Please!” — in response to Trump’s various weak-ass arguments like that nobody can tell him nuffin’ because he’s the president and some sponsors are paying for it instead of the government, and any delay would undermine national security.
If the judge had thrown in that SpongeBob meme, who would blame him.
Judge Leon’s ruling is an epic and iconic pan, the legal equivalent of the John Waters essay “101 Things I Hate,” or that review of Guy Fieri’s Times Square restaurant.
Bon mots: “no statute comes close to giving the President the authority he claims to have.”
“The President of the United States is the steward of the White House for future generations of First Families. He is not, however, the owner!”
What a metaphor for the state of its primary inhabitant, the White House ripped apart and any progress indefinitely halted! The project is already a shady boondoggle, funded by “private sponsors,” greasy enough to begin with were it merely a ballroom. But Trump has also confirmed that there is, or was, to be a whole military BUNKER-complex underneath the Walmart-sized gaudy-Saudi-style room he was designing with the help of a ChatBot and traumatized architects trying to manifest the hideous monstrosity he envisions that dwarfs the existing White House, drawing up his own plans with features like staircases to nowhere.
And the project is funded by “private sponsors,” because no banks (or Congress) would touch it with an Errol Flynn-sized pole! The same banks that were glad to float loans to a post-conviction Jeffrey Epstein were too worried about being involved in what might look an awful lot to shareholders, judges, and/or jurors like bribery. And legislators know nobody wanted to see the White House destroyed.
But some companies were unconcerned with such things, like Meta, Apple, Amazon, Google, Lockheed Martin, Microsoft, Comcast, Altria, Coinbase, Palantir Technologies, and T-Mobile, and also individuals like Jeffrey Epstein’s former neighbors the Lutnicks, former senator Kelly Loeffler and her money-guy husband Jeff Sprecher, Russian‑born private equity investor Konstantin Sokolov, Edward and Shari Glazer (owners of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers), Blackstone CEO Stephen A. Schwarzman, and the Winklevoss twins. You know, companies and people you would trust less than a piece of used chewing gum to keep secrets and not use them for nefarious gain. But whatever, Trump can’t snap his own yaptrap for shit either.
Guess what, everybody, he tricked you! It was never about a BALLROOM for fancy-dancing parties at all, or foreign leaders no longer suffering the indignity of wet feet at events on the White House lawn. Last week Trump blabbed that all along the ballroom was a mere “shed for what’s being built under the military, including from drones and including from any other thing.”
“Now it’s no secret, the military wanted it more than anybody,” Trump blabbed last Thursday in a Cabinet meeting about the “massive complex” he now admits the military has been building under where the East Wing used to stand. “It was supposed to be secret, but it became unsecret because of people that are really unpatriotic saying things.”
Then Sunday on his plane he got out the big rendering-pictures for show-and-tell-all about it.
See, it was a super-spy secret that the ballroom was a mere she-shed for the bountiful baby bunker being built but you bitches made him blurt the dirt, plus prepare visuals mounted on foam-core. Hope you Historic Trust and media assholes are real proud of what you made him do!
Remember in his first term when Black Lives Matter protestors scared Bunky Brewster so much he reportedly hid in the existing White House basement setup, fantasizing about having them all shot in the kneecaps from Blackhawks before settling for having protestors in front of a church gassed so he could go hold a Bible upside down? Seems the terrifying experience stuck with him.
And now the one thing that Trump seems to have personally wanted and obsessed over more than any other, the Beautiful Ballroom (Bunker) he’s TruthSocialed and bragged about incessantly at least several times a week and sometimes several times an hour, has been denied him, unless and until a higher court picks up and returns his binkie.
He’s been having a normal one about it, of course, posting more renderings and ranting ranty rants.
He’s not been getting much of what he wants lately. The Senate won’t pass the SAVE Act and the House won’t fund DHS. His Iran war is a humiliation, his approval rating has sunk to a new low (33 percent!) as gas prices hit new highs ($4.12!), and child-rape accusations against him in the Epstein files are sounding more credible all the time. And as they always have, judges keep telling him no.
He’s losing his appeal, rizz, mind, shapely ankles, and now his ballroom. He is not the girl with the most cake, though he has wet his beak with billions. Still, at the end of the day he’s a tool of the amoral and even-richer pricks who surround him, helping make them richer, and can’t even live his fantasy of being the boy with the biggest balls of them all until he finds a new loophole.
Sad.
Considering that he has enriched himself to the tune of $4.6 billion during his first year in office, he should be forced to pay for the reconstruction of the East Wing of the White House. The White House preservation board should be the only ones to have a say as to the architect chosen to redesign the project and the board should be the only authority the architect and construction company should obey in all manners.
He is an effing tenant and he destroyed part of the building. MAKE THE SON OF A BITCH PAY FOR THE DAMAGE.
Well, Trump has noped out on the SCOTUS hearing. He has some clouds to yell at.