194 Comments
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Always Be Ithacating's avatar

Tom Fitton does not have a law degree. May his quote about Obama's supposed misuse of intelligence agencies live long enough to bite Fitton in the ass – "When karma lands, it lands hard.”

Queen Méabh's avatar

Law enforcement and prosecutors do this kind of shit all the time. There are 2 recordings of interviews of me conducted by police in 2004, and the quality of the recordings are so poor that you can only hear about 1 word in 5 that I said. Example, in one place you hear me say:

I [mumble mumble mumble mumble] married [mumble mumble] kids.

The prosecutor played these recordings in court, which bored everyone to death for 4 hours because you could barely hear a word I said, and prepared typed transcripts which were given to the defense team, the judge and the jury. The transcript has me saying:

I always wanted to get married and have kids.

But what I actually said was

I never wanted to get married or have kids.

Those are 2 very different statements that can be interpreted in multiple different ways. The transcriptionist MADE ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT WHAT I SAID THAT WEREN'T ACCURATE!

And she did the same thing multiple times on every single page. Only when she couldn't GUESS at what I was saying did she write "Unintelligible."

And I told my attorneys to get new, accurate transcripts nine months ago, and they simply haven't bothered to do it or even tell me why they haven't done it.

Mike Scully's avatar

Someone get that man a shirt that fits

Runfastandwin's avatar

Confederacy of Dunces...

chascates's avatar

"...telephonically interviewed...". Christ.

Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

“mixing metaphors like a Cuisinart in a crossfire hurricane”

Well done, sir, well done.

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Dok. I have no dog or pony (I almost typed phony and maybe should have left it) in this fight. They're all lousy, or perhaps they put the lice in police. Judicial Watch is a pox on this land, and so is Kra$h Patel. Let. Them. Fight.

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

“[redacted] Thomas Crooks [redacted] in [redacted] and [redacted] in [redacted] and [redacted]”

I mean seriously, are we paying these people by the hour or what?

Tetman Callis's avatar

My mom, may she rest in peace, was a big follower of Judicial Watch. She and I had so little we could talk about.

Sgt JMK's avatar

I'm so sorry. My 86 year old mom is a big Judicial Watch fan, also too... she spends hours painstakingly responding to their moneybeg snail mails (she believes they care about her opinions) while she watches her favorite Faux Nooz liars.

She and I don't really have a lot to say to one another, either.

Belial Cruller's avatar

But how good is the shooter's risotto recipe?

Antifa Commander's avatar

DON’T DO STEROIDS, KIDS

Also, don’t pop the collar on your polo shirt like it’s still 1985. It ain’t, kids.

tehbaddr's avatar

Meh! A big nothingburder!

tehbaddr's avatar

It's clear they were exchanging cookie recipes!

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Tom feuds with Kash and NEITHER makes any reference to the other's alcoholism, sexual orientation, skin color, mental impairment, Hinduism or rank within the inner circle hierarchy?

How on earth are we to believe that this is a real feud? The lack of character assassination proves this 'fight' is just a psyop false flag con job aimed entirely at discrediting the growing knowledge that all the 'assassination attempts' were staged hoaxes.

Sister Artemis's avatar

Upvote for the fighting ponies. I miss the once-rich landscape of Wonkette MLP references.

Kateorite's avatar

OT

AnyWonk hear from Hamilton this morning? Has Lewis returned?

SkeptiKC's avatar

Lewis has been found and is safe and sound.

Kateorite's avatar

WHEW! Thank you Skepti : )

Militant Agnostic's avatar

Yes, he was found under a parked car.

Kateorite's avatar

Aw yeah! Thank you MA : )

Sister Artemis's avatar

omg, he DID get out! That little scamp, I hope he learned his lesson and will stay safely in the condo from here on out.