472 Comments
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AIB's avatar

TFG is the new “Set ‘em Loose Bruce.” (NYC arcana)

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FederalHillbilly's avatar

Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, 3%ers, Militia = KKK with better branding.

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Revenant's avatar

The torture never stops.

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Spleen Victoria's avatar

I saw the first arrestee of the newly pardoned “Freedom Fighters” got immediately arrested on gun charges. Womp womp.

Hey, they can also deport Tarreo, right? I mean, birthright citizenship is done now? He doesn’t seem beige enough.

Also, we know now that Tiff was the fave all along since she’ll be the only kid not deported, right?

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Robert Eckert's avatar

"Millions of dollars, hundreds of thousands of investigation hours and court hours spent bringing to justice the treasonous little pukes" but not the treasonous big puke, a mistake we may never recover from.

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Marcie. I. Just. Can't. Even. Anymore.

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

I really feel for the family of Stewart Rhodes. I thought of them specifically when Fuckface von Clownstick released the psychotic hordes. What a slap in the face. What a terrifying nightmare. How do you run a country like this? There is no law and order. There’s suck off the fat emperor or get kicked down a well. The outrage of these pardons alone is so egregious, so awful, so blatant, so fucking disgusting and wrong, so counter to anything this country was supposed to stand for, it beggars belief. We are rapidly becoming coming a shithole country ourselves, steered into a ditch by a decompensating, despotic, degraded, decaying, dumbass. And we had another choice! It didn’t have to be this way. I miss the hope, optimism, intelligence, wit and good cheer promised by Kamala and Tim so fucking much. I miss Joe. I miss sanity. I reject this embarrassing bullshit. The Republican Party and its enablers in the media are a cancer and that weeping fistula at the top that just let loose hundreds and hundreds of newly empowered violent criminals to wreak havoc can, once again, go fuck himself.

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Hank Napkin's avatar

Has Sir pardoned the Nashville High School Shooter yet? WHAT'S TAKING SO LONG!?!?!?!?!

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UnDrewsual's avatar

"Wonder which one of the brain geniuses who filmed each other committing crimes and posted the footage to their Facebooks will get re-arrested on a new charge first?"

Sadly, it will probably be the ones that murder their neighbors and family who testified against them, assuming they don't then turn the gun on themselves. Yeah, they aren't "legally allowed" to own guns. I think we all know that's not going to stop them from getting them.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

They got one on a pending federal firearms charge. That one day of freedom had better have been especially sweet for him.

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UnDrewsual's avatar

I hope it was miserable. These people do not deserve joy.

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Hank Napkin's avatar

Lost amidst the Atlas Shrugged-volume of pages of EO's issued yesterday is the "Styrofoam Peanuts Atmosphere Rescue" or "SPAR" order:

"Most of our breathing for air is right now trapped inside bubble wrap when the peanuts can do the same job better so we can breathe until all the windmills come down, then maybe!" exclaimed Sir whilst struggling to button his Sir coat. "Cold out" he added.

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

Before the inauguration, republicans, including J Divan and Lindsey, said Stinky shouldn’t pardon violent offenders. They were so sure he’d do a careful vetting process and only pardon the nonviolent ones. Nope, fuck you, he just did a blanket pardon of all them, because what part of landslide mandate don’t you understand?

And Little Marco is still emptiest suit in all of DC.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

The global diplomatic community is going to eat him for lunch and spit out the bones.

What I'm trying to say is, I think he's in over his head.

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RRJKR's avatar

And the shortest

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RRJKR's avatar

Having participated in, and helped organize antiwar protests between 1968 and 1973, I can say with certainty that all of us very sincere Leftists, even Marxists, would have had to draw the line at anything as crazy as the shit that went down on January 6th

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Hank Napkin's avatar

One worries that after two days of full-on cruelty and naked venality Sir's chubby is already shrinking while Sir's thoughts turn again and again to "Nine Holes"... Sad.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

He can't leave for Florida until tomorrow night at the earliest.

It's got to be hard.

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RRJKR's avatar

My 22 year old self is standing there puzzled because I'm now on the side of the police, (aka "The Pigs) "Damn, what happened to you , man", he says. One word answer, TRUMP

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Robert Eckert's avatar

"I never imagined that in our great national divorce, the Left would get custody of the football players and the FBI agents, while the Right got the woo-woo health quacks and the Russian fellow travellers" (quote marks because this is someone else's line but I don't remember whose)

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

It’s a damn shame that Irony is dead, or it would have walked up and just bitch-slapped those police unions.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

The sad part? It won't be the last time.

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

I HOPE THEY WERE CANNED CLAMS.

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