423 Comments

Hey there, you filthy fuckaducks, I guess I need to remind some of you that we actually have rules here, because jesus christ on a burning e-bike some of you seem to have forgotten Rule 4:

Try not to be a bunch of goddamned misogynists. That includes calling rightwing women sluts or otherwise demeaning them solely as sexual figures. Attack their politics, not the fact that they're women.

Why yes, that includes not going on and on about women's looks, because no, what makes Kellyanne Conway a horrible person has nothing to do with whether you think she's attractive.

https://www.wonkette.com/p/rules-for-commenting-radicals

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Thank you for the reminder. I am guilty of typing and sending before thinking. I still find Kellyanne useless tho...

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thank you. The last couple of days has also been a hell of people making sex jokes about Ted Cruz that unnecessarily include Heidi Cruz.

Dont' get me wrong, Ted deserves it. And also don't get me wrong, Heidi married Ted, so I bet she's no cup of sweetness and communism-light. Nonetheless, when Ted makes his stupid joke and you respond with demeaning, sexual stuff that includes Heidi, you're making Heidi responsible for something Ted said. Anyway, that's not this story, but it's been enough of the last 2 days around here that I've been flitting around the comment world like a dragonfly, trying not to hover over the worst of it. (I initially made a couple comments asking people to cut it out, but I gave that up.)

Anyway, this is all just to say that we were due for a reminder that we're supposed to be a bunch of feminists here and I am just super grateful you took the time out of your day to do it from your bully pulpit.

Thank you.

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Conway is an extremely ugly person on the inside. What’s on the surface hardly matters when everything beneath the skin is pure garbage.

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I thought the "god damn it babies, you've got to be kind" quote was part of the rules.

Am I missing it? Is there an appendix?

Seems like it should be in the actual decree.

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I would love to have a 20 questions session with her, but only under oath.

Number 1 would be "Did you ever observe Donald Trump walking and chewing gum at the same time?".

Number 20 would be "Can you tell me what hair condtioner you use?".

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Only so I can avoid it like the plague. That thing on her head looks like straw.

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So, ...you got the snark perfectly.

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I don't know how much she makes, but I guarantee you she can afford a decent stylist and a ten buck bottle of leave-in conditioner.

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Doc, let's face it, you needed some overtime to cover gold-plated Thornton x-mas presents. What better way to generate some inappropriate comments than to post a Conway story?

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A few questions:

1) Am I still allowed to call Matt Gaetz a slut?

2) I used to comment on the quality of KAC's plastic surgery, but in an approving way. She's an asshole, but her plastic surgeon is a genius, and there's no snark there, just mad respect for her surgeon's skill.

3) Someone posted last night that they wished Dior would stop trying to make them want to smell like Johnny Depp. I posted that I would like to smell Amber Heard. I did NOT mean that in a sexual way, but you know how the perverts around here are, so that might be a fine line.

Please take into account that I'm a woman. A very shallow woman.

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You roar pleasantly.

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That may be the nicest compliment I've ever gotten!

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It's true and you are welcome.

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:-) X eleventy million!

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KAC is a horrible person; You could even say she is "deplorable".

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But is it really making fun of her looks if we're actually just making fun of some probably male cosmetic surgeon's works?

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Thank god we don't allow comments (thanks for the warning)

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I agree with Howard Johnson!

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"And I agree with Howard Johnson agreeing with Howard Johnson!"

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I'm glad the children were here to hear this authentic frontier gibberish!

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Can I say she looks like the embalmer over did it?

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The banhammer is POISED

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I'll allow it.

(Wonkette probably won't though....)

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Truth fully, this is why I do not go on WonkZoom or attend any Wonk events.

Too many people here judge by looks, clothes, and appearance.

Yes there was a time after my GQ cover issue I got front row seats at the Catwalks at Fashion Weeks at Milan, Paris and NYC. But I haven't done that since Ike was prez.

For a seemingly smart group, not everyone here knows they will get older. Maybe even OLDE.

Maybe get health problems. Maybe have less $ to spend on looks.

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Have you seen pictures of the WonkMeets? We're all very beautiful people, on the inside. Also on the inside, we're all 8 year olds wondering what the hell happened to our bodies.

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Well, Idk about you, but I'M 23 inside. With a 60ish yo brain.

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Can I make fun of men’s looks? Because some of these conservative assholes are just begging for it.

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Gaetz! Cruz! Comer who looks like a box.

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Are we doing that again? Because I thought we weren't doing that anymore

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I resent that remark as I just stepped out of the shower after the gym and so no longer physically filthy.

To the other charge I plead Nolo contendre

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I don't look good naked anymore

I'm a broke-down, double-wide version of the man I was before

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"I don't look good naked anymore

I'm a broke-down, double-wide version of the man I was before"

But you DO have a future writing lyrics for country music.

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Thanks for the credit but that is an actual country music song with a video..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOgd9hitEAE

I even screwed it up by substituting broke down for the oritgin deep fried.

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Either way, that song is a masterpiece.

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She's pretty close, but still a bit off. Sure, every day is Jan. 6, but an EV isn't quite socialist enough for us so we use public transportation. As a man, the daily abortion is tough, but I still manage to get one, just to prove I'm no DINO.

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"I think Democrats wake up every morning and they look at the calendar on the iPhone..."

Nope, I hate iPhones. I think Apple is too full of themselves so I would never own one.

I look at my Samsung and see that it's January 6, 2021. Then I get in my 2007 Honda Ridgeline, (which once belonged to my Dad), and go to my Urologist to see why my PSA move up to 7.

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"And then they get into an electric vehicle and go get an abortion."

`

You don't know the half of it, Blondie.

I have eight or nine abortions a year, all of which are performed by a transgender person with blue hair, under an endangered tree, on an Indian reservation.

I sacrifice some of them to Satan, and then make smoothies out of the rest, so I can be whorey AND fat.

::shakes head::

It's like she's not even TRYING.

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I’ll take democracy, EVs and bodily autonomy ANY day of our lord, and so would the vast majority of Americans (including many conservatives) over dictatorships, gasoline, and forced birth.

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I’ll take democracy, EVs and bodily autonomy ANY day of our lord, and so would the vast majority of Americans (including many conservatives) over dictatorships, gasoline, and forced birth.

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𝑺𝒐 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒅𝒐𝒖𝒃𝒕, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕

Oh Kellyanne, sit the fuck down. Organizers of your Jan. 6 house party were convicted of seditious conspiracy, so the event they brought halfway to fruition (including the threatened murder of the Vice President, the Speaker of the House and several representatives) is rightly called an insurrection. The trial court in Colorado heard five days of evidence as to whether Trump did or did not engage in that insurrection, and ruled that Legal Fact Jesus fucking Christ of course he did, he ordered it up and they delivered, and by the way we all watched it live on the tee-vee so don't give us that horseshit about "in doubt."

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Right, Kellyanne; as if we didn't remember that in describing LIES it was you, no other, who dubbed them "alternative facts." GFY, KC, and eat a whole bucket of salted rat dicks.

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What? Will there be no open thread tonight?

Whatever. I just sent a nastygram to the lawn service I hired (the one that persists in requesting a review of my "experience" every time they send some guy to mow the front lawn- I usually don't even notice until much later, there's always somebody mowing in this neighborhood) because they keep sending someone every two weeks despite the fact that IT IS WINTER, the grass is dead and NOT growing, and keep billing me for making no difference. I told them to stop before I cancel and move on to somebody who knows what seasons are.

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My BOWLING GREEN fractures are still apainin me.

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mine ache whenever its agonna rain.

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It was a horrific event! And nobody even got to do any bowling.

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As always, listening to anything Kellyanne says has been a waste of time because it has no basis in reality.

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Oh come on, who can't resist a refreshing abortion every morning?

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The reality is that most voters - including most Democrats - do not live in a J6 fishbowl as there is here.

Even Democrats who are avid to vote care less about what Trump did than what he will do.

Setting up that any mention of J6 is fanatic obsession then goes after even the few throughts about it that most Democrats have and casts a pre-emptive pall on when, in the spring, it dominates the news because the case will be on.

She really is not a fool.

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She just plays one on TV!

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Can we agree that if Obama had summoned a mob of hipsters to storm the capitol to overturn the 2016 presidential election, these people would be crapping themselves and doing everything in their power to prosecute Obama or Bill Clinton or any other democrat who would have perpetrated such activity? Please.

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Roger Stone summoned a mob of Brooks Bros thugs to halt counting in 2000. They were flown down by Enron and threatened the staff doing the count in Florida. This is the SECOND time that tactic has been used by a Repub that lost the popular vote this century.

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IOKIYAR

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Woke hipsters, daddy-o!

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Wait I thought Kellyanne resigned her White House job because she did not agree with the insurrection. Do I have that right? I will have to check Wikipedia.

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I get the rules, but we can't deny that hate makes people ugly. The irrational hatred that people like KAC feel towards the LGBTQ (and frankly, every other) community undeniably festers deep inside them and makes them physically embody that hatred, and thus become fucking ugly people.

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Citation desperately needed, please.

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Exhibit A - Alex Jones. He looks like an unhealthy Medicare patient but he's not even 50 years old. Are you serious?

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Not trying to get in a fight. If you believe one's exterior reflects one's interior, you are free to believe that. It is a very stupid opinion, but I respect your right to believe said stupid opinion.

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You are precisely trying to get in a fight. So fuck off. Your opinion is stupid and you should feel stupid for having it.

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