It' s still difficult for her to tell the story. It was a cool morning in 2011, or 1984, or 1526, or 4 B.C., the year doesn't matter. Kellyanne Conway was a young girl, or a teenager, or possibly an old great grandmother, reflecting on a life well lived. She doesn't remember how she ended up in Bowling Green that day, only that she had just left an angry meeting with the owners of the Miss New Jersey Blueberry Princess Pageant, who had told her she wouldn't be able to carry out her duties as
Obviously, she meant Columbine, and in her mind had the thought of Michael Moore's "Bowling for Columbine" and it came out Bowling Green. I instantly knew what she meant, but, I'm neither a dumbass nor a whiny, peevish leftist, let alone both.
The Kentucky hills reveal few frillsFor honest souls who call them homeThey labor long, and right or wrongFind joy when they the hills can roam.But evil isn’t revenuersThe’re people who come from “away,”And they snuck up on the strip-mined hillsAnd massacred Kain-tuck that day.
You talk of horrors of nine-eleven,The twin-towered tragedy was real, of courseAnd Pentagon and Flight 93: many died and still are mourned.But no event compares to the goreThat caused polluted streams to clogWith grandmas’ bras and grandpas’ teethWith blood and guts and heads and handsAnd doors that still held last Christmas’s wreaths.
“Allahu Akbar” shouts echoed through hollersAnd nearly woke the dead long sleepingAs masked men with automatics and scimitarsWere from rock to rock seen leaping.Hound dogs bayed and were dispatched,Outhouses tipped and made into splinters,And worst of all, the saddest of sad--Stills were destroyed: yes, it was that bad!
Oh, the carnage! Oh, the losses,Oh, the blood that dripped from oaks!Oh, the terror! Oh, the fright!Oh, the spilled RCs and Cokes!The Bowling Green Massacre resoundsIn folklore now among the folks,In banjo twangs, in bluegrass beats,In general store stories and backroom jokes.
From big to small, from young to old,We’ll ne’er forget! We’ll oft rememberThe Massacre! In January, or was itIn July or August, or perhaps September.But when we gather to constructThe monument to those who died,We’ll drink a toast of Mountain DewTo Kellyanne, whose brain is fried.
Billy O'Reilly of Fox BJ News was there and covered the story...from a bar stool like he covered the Falklands War.
Obviously, she meant Columbine, and in her mind had the thought of Michael Moore's "Bowling for Columbine" and it came out Bowling Green. I instantly knew what she meant, but, I'm neither a dumbass nor a whiny, peevish leftist, let alone both.
Hail, CatCafeser! Morituri Salutamos (or something like that)
crack ho' looks.
This utter bullshit is in direct contradiction with Kellyanne's own comments on what she was referencing,
Mr. Hurst, you deserve an Alternative Pulitzer for this one! Brava!
Hail norcalOG! Carthago delenda est!
super cereal, you mean...
The Ballad of Bowling Green
The Kentucky hills reveal few frillsFor honest souls who call them homeThey labor long, and right or wrongFind joy when they the hills can roam.But evil isn’t revenuersThe’re people who come from “away,”And they snuck up on the strip-mined hillsAnd massacred Kain-tuck that day.
You talk of horrors of nine-eleven,The twin-towered tragedy was real, of courseAnd Pentagon and Flight 93: many died and still are mourned.But no event compares to the goreThat caused polluted streams to clogWith grandmas’ bras and grandpas’ teethWith blood and guts and heads and handsAnd doors that still held last Christmas’s wreaths.
“Allahu Akbar” shouts echoed through hollersAnd nearly woke the dead long sleepingAs masked men with automatics and scimitarsWere from rock to rock seen leaping.Hound dogs bayed and were dispatched,Outhouses tipped and made into splinters,And worst of all, the saddest of sad--Stills were destroyed: yes, it was that bad!
Oh, the carnage! Oh, the losses,Oh, the blood that dripped from oaks!Oh, the terror! Oh, the fright!Oh, the spilled RCs and Cokes!The Bowling Green Massacre resoundsIn folklore now among the folks,In banjo twangs, in bluegrass beats,In general store stories and backroom jokes.
From big to small, from young to old,We’ll ne’er forget! We’ll oft rememberThe Massacre! In January, or was itIn July or August, or perhaps September.But when we gather to constructThe monument to those who died,We’ll drink a toast of Mountain DewTo Kellyanne, whose brain is fried.
Trump got 1/3 of it right. He stopped with "Veni" and then added the words, "And it was yooouge! The greatest Veni I ever made."
We're expected to tolerate outright lies now?
I hope the day comes soon that they figure out she's a liability, and she gets an epic "You're Fired!".
Sniff! That's beautiful!
Don't you diss Captain O'Reilly, a decorated member of the 101st Fighting Bar Stools!
KAC died in Bowling Green some time back in the Middle Ages (before it was founded) and has walked the earth, undead, since then.
Throwing this out...seeing if it goes viral-
"Bullsh*t Barbie"???